


Tumblr Prompt Collection: Various Shyan Fics

by Ghoulboyboos



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Chapter specific tags in chapter notes, Drabble Collection, Ficlet Collection, M/M, One Shot Collection
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-02
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2019-07-05 20:59:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 39
Words: 80,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15871653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ghoulboyboos/pseuds/Ghoulboyboos
Summary: The complete collection of the fanfics I have written and posted on Tumblr. Each prompt has been submitted by asks :D





	1. Shane and Ryan - Living together as a couple but not being out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> spaceaceofficial asked:  
> PROMPT maybe Shane and Ryan have been secretly living together for a while and almost blew their cover when they were talking about spring cleaning together??
> 
> Tags: Secret relationship, a bit of angst, hurt/comfort  
> Rating: G

“Maybe we could do a little spring cleaning together.” Ryan suggests.  
“I mean,” Shane stares at him, nonchalant and an unspoken question between them, “we live in seperate locations, so…”  
“Yeah.” Ryan answers automatically. “We could do it concurrently though-”

On the inside he is screaming in panic. He can’t even follow the rest of the conversation completely. They had agreed to keep their “thing” a secret. At least for now. And that included not spilling that they lived together. Ryan just almost blew their cover over fucking _shirts_. Their conversation putters on about facetiming and then he really feels like it’s too much. He makes a gesture towards the camera crew. “Five minute break?” They don’t seem to notice anything odd and merely nod as they shut off the equipment and Ryan is out of his chair in a split second and speed-walking towards the bathrooms. He is pretty sure Shane is following him, but Shane is great with a pokerface and he probably doesn’t have to rush at all. Ryan sees him enter the bathroom when he is splashing cold water in his face at the sink. He rubs his eyes and suddenly Shane is there, behind him and visible in the mirror. Shane leans against the door, making sure nobody can just burst in and Ryan feels heat raise in his wet face. “Shane,” he croaks and he notices with alarm that his eyes are welling up, “I’m so sorry… I forgot and I almost blew it and-”

Shane shakes his head. His hands are stuffed in his pockets and he looks over Ryan carefully.  
“Don’t worry. Nobody will gain anything from that. To the world, we’re just two bros facetiming because it keeps us doing actual housework on the weekend.”

Ryan dries his face and tries to hide that he teared up, patting the paper against his eyes carefully. He nearly flinches when Shane’s arms slowly snake around his waist and he is hugged from behind. Ryan lowers his hands and looks at the mirror, meeting Shane’s eyes in the reflection.

“Maybe…” Shane strarts softly. “Maybe we should tell them at one point. I know you’re a private person and I know you want to keep it away from social media. I respect that. But if they knew, we wouldn’t have to keep doing this little dance of hiding every tiny aspect of our lives. Don’t you think?”

Ryan sighs and closes his eyes as Shane presses a kiss to the back of his neck.

“I want to, Shane. I really want to. I’m just scared…”

Shane hugs him a little tighter and Ryan allows himself to relax into the embrace. In the reflection, Shane looks a little sad and a little helpless.

“I know, baby. I wish I could help you with that.”

Ryan covers the hands on his belly with his own.

“I’ll get there, Shane. I swear to you. You deserve this and I’m not ashamed of you.”

Shane nuzzles the back of Ryan’s neck and sighs, some of the tension melting away.

“I love you, Ryan.”

Ryan swallows.

“I love you too.”


	2. Ricky Goldsworth and C. C. Tinsley - Interrogation & Secret Relationship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> justanotherspn asked:  
> Ricky goldsworth and cc tinsly fanfic maybe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First installment of Goldsworth and Tinsley "secretly" shacking up.
> 
> No real tags, except for Ricky making references to their intimate relationship.  
> Rating: T

“Listen here, sweetheart!” Ricky slams his hands on the table and C.C. is sure he would have gotten up if he wasn’t currently cuffed to it. The detective glances over at the mirror in the wall and shakes his head slightly, just in case the officers behind it decided to interrupt them. He looks back at Goldsworth who has brought up a hand to point at the private eye.

“Extortion, robbery, theft, alright, I’ll fess up to that. I like pretty things, fucking sue me later. But I’m no murderer. I didn’t harm anybody, just the old fart’s bank account and he can take it. He has enough money stashed somewhere in Mexico. But I had nothing to do with the killing. And I know you don’t really think I murder someone because you know me.”

His face takes on a catlike smile.

“You… _know me_. In the biblical sense of the word.”

Tinsley feels his face and neck flush. Goldsworth leans over the table and brings his bound hands as close as he can to where C.C.’s are linked.

“And if you don’t plan on putting these cuffs to good use, I would suggest you get me out of them. I could put my hands on you much better without this… and your little friends behind the wall would surely like a show.

C.C. Tinsley is very intelligent. He is also, he thinks, as he is working a finger under his collar, very weak.


	3. Ryan in Lingerie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> theawfuledges asked:  
> Omg, I'm so excited you're accepting shyan prompts! Because I'm weak for it, how about lingerie/the first time one of them dresses up for the other in the bedroom?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter tags are: Crossdressing, Lingerie  
> Rating: probably T

“If you’re not out there in the next ten minutes, I will start and finish alone and then fall asleep, just out of spite!”

Shane’s voice is muffled by the bathroom door and Ryan allows himself to roll his eyes a bit. He has come home with a hidden bag in his backpack and the promise of something new for the bedroom. Shane had expressed curiosity but otherwise seemed nonchalant about the whole thing, probably to make Ryan mad. Ryan chuckles to himself. Shane wouldn’t know what hit him.

He turns in front of the mirror. It’s not big enough to give him a full picture, but enough to gather that he looks _good_. It’s definitely not something he has expected to rock, not after how weird he felt in the bathing suit video. But this was different.

Soft black lace on the trim of the dark panties that - sure, do put a lot of focus on the bulge they were not designed to carry, but they do present it very nicely anyway. A corset that barely covers his nipples, closed with little buttons in front and Ryan has a perverse urge to rip it open dramatically. Both pieces are connected by tight straps and the outfit clearly shows off more through the lace than it actually covers. If someone with boobs were to wear this, they would be on full display. Ryan turns and glances down at his ass. “Nice.” He thinks and grins to himself. It’s tight but not too tight, giving his ass a nice bubble butt shape. The long straps on the top, that hang down his front still have to be done up so he pulls them upwards over his shoulders and carefully ties them into a bow at the back of his neck. He feels the silken bands fall on his back and shivers. The garters hanging from the panties are tugging on the thigh high socks he put on and he flexes his toes under the mesh.

While it feels good, he is still afraid of making himself look foolish. But by the end of the day, this was Shane. Even if he found the idea stupid or ended up laughing at Ryan, they trusted each other and Shane would most likely still go through with it just to make Ryan happy.

He sighs and fixes his hair a final time. Then he turns around and opens the door wide.

“Finally! I thought you fell asleep in th-”

Ryan struts out and casually leans against the wall with his arm draped behind his head. He settles his weight on one foot, crosses the other one behind it and tries to take on a pose of absolute nonchalance. “Think _Big Spender_!” His brain supplies without really helping because Ryan feels himself blush.

But it’s fine because Shane is sitting on the bed, mouth open and cheeks slowly reddening as he stares at Ryan. His eyes are almost comically wide and the laugh that works itself out of his throat is breathy and nervous and Ryan feels a thrill in his chest.

“Like what you see?” It’s an old line and it’s stupid but it just works _so well_ in this moment.

He pushes himself off the doorframe and walks over to Shane, trying his best to give it a proper catwalk strut. Shane leans back on his hands from where he sits when Ryan reaches him and Ryan wastes no time climbing on Shane’s lap and putting a finger under his chin. Shane swallows with some difficulty, letting his eyes roam Ryan’s body and the soft clothes he is wrapped in. Finally, his boyfriend finds his voice again.

“Would it be cheesy to say that you look delicious?”

Ryan doesn’t quite scoff but he rolls his eyes at that.  
“Either that or worrying. Depending on if you want to eat me or not.”

“Hmmm. Define “eat”?”

“Oh my god!”

They both start to giggle and he feels a lot better about this little fancy now. Shane brings his hands up as if unsure if he is allowed to touch, but when Ryan waggles his eyebrows at him one hand settles at the back of his neck, pulling slightly on the bow. He bares his throat and Shane latches onto it with a growl, nipping and sucking on the skin while his other hand shoves itself in the back of Ryan’s panties.

Oh yeah. Definitely a good idea.


	4. Demon! Shane and Angel! Ryan - Angst: Don't go where I can't follow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> buckybarnesnoble: Just an idea for the “Every Demon is assigned an Angel to gain passage to Heaven” but with the quote “do not go, where i cant follow” like what if the demon thought they couldnt follow the angel and like tried to go back to hell to just like mope but like the Angel sends little messages in a bottle kinda like sending a message in the sea bc thats the only way they could send that message. And like it takes a long time for the demon to get the message and during that time an angel war broke out and the angel was injured, and the only way to save them is to get the one they love the most to revive their essence with touch. But like the demon doesnt know that. So its like an awkward after math. I dunno sad with happy??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Demon! Shane, Angel! Ryan, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Temporary Character Death, also warnings for Shane being a bit blashphemous...?  
> Ratings: T for swearing?

All those eon’s have passed since Lucifer told good old dad to go eat a turd - which might not have been the exact words, but the meaning had definitely been that - and Shane still remembers the sight of heaven. Of course he does. They all do. It’s their punishment, because God is a bit of a dick and likes whatever he does too much. So of course they remember heaven the way a truck driver remembers that one roadside bar that had the best chicken wings in the entire universe and which he just can’t seem to find again, no matter how often he drives past the spot.

Shane yearns for heaven. Even if he is especially mad about the situation, he still does. No matter how true every rejection of it ever felt, he still needs to get back there, because otherwise he is going to be destroyed. Shane likes life. He doesn’t mind hell but “life” is really _oddly_ fun. He likes the times he has spend on earth and all the thwarting and meddling that has happened between him and his siblings and the angels.

Angels. He doesn’t really have beef with angels. They are made from the same stuff in the end, even though angels tend to lean a little too much into being “the favorite”. Most of them, at least. He meets “his” angel on earth, funnily enough.

When they figure out who the other is, they have loads of fun doing the little show. Ryan is jumpy and worried, despite his powers, because the thought of human souls on earth and not behind the pearly gates freaks him out and Shane thinks it’s the funniest fucking thing he has ever heard. He is picking fights with his kind in the meantime. Ready to fight Mothman in a parking lot. He stole that bridge from Steve and because Ryan chipped in last minute, he can’t even give it back, because it also belongs to Ryan. Steve doesn’t talk to him anymore, but Shane hardly sees that as a loss. The guy is just weird.

When the cycle of their “mortal” life comes at an end, Ryan promises him to pick him up afterwards. Shane pretends not to know what he’s talking about, even though he breaks out in a cold sweat.

“I’ll take you to heaven, of course. You know it’s in my power to ask for forgiveness for of your kind and you are obviously not happy down there if you like hanging out here so much.”

Shane shrugs and mumbles something about the food being much better up here but he is sure Ryan sees through him right away. Ryan says he will send him a message and that it will take time. It’s all fine to Shane. Time is so weird on earth, because every day leaves such a huge impression on your senses, even if you just lie around in bed all day. Time in hell is just… sitting around, mostly. Scaring a couple of bad souls. Playing poker with some heart-eater or another.

He doesn’t tell Ryan. He _can’t_ enter heaven. Some part of him truly knows it. When they left, God had offered forgiveness to each and every one of them. Most said nothing. Those where the kind of guys that could come back when an Angel held their hand and asked nicely. Shane had been the type to flick the big guy off and walk backwards into hell, because he has always been confrontational when he is angry and man… he had been _pissed_ back then. He doesn’t even really remember why. Maybe it was watching God make another little plaything and then torture it like he did to the humans. Because it showed, that that’s what all of them were to him, right? Just something to get time to pass. Another round of playing Sims.

Shane doesn’t get forgiveness and Ryan doesn’t know that. Shane doesn’t have it in him to tell Ryan the truth, so he just nods and says he will wait.

-

Hell is boring and even though Shane doesn’t have a physical brain with hormone balances in it anymore, he feels himself getting more and more depressed. He wants to be with Ryan. He doesn’t even want to go back to heaven, he just wants Ryan. It hurts like a motherfucker and Shane buries himself in soulsand till the weight holds his chest and his heart together and he mopes. He doesn’t know how much time has passed but one day, when he tosses skulls in lake of lava, (because Lucy is too fucking extra to have a bit of water and a couple of rocks) he finds the bottle.

It’s shiny and blue in all the red and black and as he fishes it out, it’s warm to the touch. Not hot as he would have expected something to be that had bobbed around in lava. It’s just a small blueish bottle and it has a sheet of parchment in it. Actual old parchment and he sees the glint of a golden band around it to keep it in shape.

“What the fu…?”

He peels the wax seal off the bottle, which strangely enough hasn’t melted in the heat. As he shakes the scroll out into his palm, the weight of the golden band surprises him and he sees that it’s actually a ring.

When he slips it off the paper he absentmindedly lets it drop onto his finger and it fits, which would be disturbing if not for the calm feeling that settles over him. He knows that feeling and he doesn’t even have to open the scroll to know that this is Ryan’s message.

> Shane,
> 
> I have reached heaven safely. If you touch the ring and call my name, you can reach me. Don’t be afraid. I will wait right at the bottom of the stairs for you and I will hold your hand when we walk. I can’t wait to see you.
> 
> Ryan.

Shane’s kinda glad that demons can’t cry because this would get him to. He holds onto the parchment and shakes. He can’t. He can’t take Ryan’s hand and walk up those stairs - that really are just there for the image, like seriously, they’re not even corporeal - and see the pearly gates only to hear the gatekeeper tell Ryan that Shane is not one of those who have been forgiven. He can imagine Ryan’s face falling, the confusion and the hurt in it. He can see Ryan arguing for him, trying to convince the gatekeeper that there must have been a mistake, a mixup. Because Shane has only ever been _nice_ to Ryan. Well, Shane has only ever been nice to _Ryan_. He doesn’t care about others. And imagining that he would hurt Ryan in such a way, would betray him like this breaks his heart. He’s not sure he has one, but whatever’s in there is definitely breaking.

He can’t.

He doesn’t reply. He’s not even sure he can, but he keeps the ring and tries to cry at night over the unfairness of it all and about himself because he was young and rebellious and _stupid_ and now it keeps him from being with Ryan. It sucks.

More messages come. Each and every one of them calls out to Shane, begs him to come, to use the ring or to answer him. Sometimes, Ryan sounds angry over Shane not responding, sometimes he sounds sad or worried. He asks if Shane is alright, if he has done anything that would cause Shane not wanting to answer and Shane stabs himself in the thigh with one of those stupid fucking pitchforks because otherwise he will run right to Ryan, not even use the ring, just fucking bolt out of Hell and all the way up.

Finally, they stop. He’s sad, of course. But he hopes Ryan has moved on. What’s one heartbreak in the lifetime of earth and humanity? Ryan will find another demon to save, someone who actually could be saved and Shane would manage. Maybe.

-

He’s sleeping, or at least pretending to, when he hears the first whispers of war. Angels fighting Angels and he feels transported all the way back to the beginning of time when Lucifer attacked Michael because dear ol’ Mike wouldn’t let Lucy talk to “dad”. They still hated each other. Had left scars on each other, too. Killing an Angel was hard, but not impossible and if anyone could manage, it was another Angel.

He is curious. And he’s worried. So Shane asks around to find out what happened. Apparently, some Angels had questioned the way humanity is going, about how they seem to think humans are destroying everything, including themselves. Ryan would have been on the side of the humans, Shane thinks. He loves humanity. He would go on about how they would face so many hardships and struggles and losses and about how the mass of them would still always be ready to take another stone in their path as long as they could ease life for someone else. Shane wasn’t quite as positive, but he would have fought anything and anyone for Ryan’s view and he loves Ryan for all his good hopes, he really does.

And then he gets a final message. It’s shakey and there are spills of essence all over it, more pungent than blood and Shane freezes as he sees and smells it. Ryan’s dying. He’s fallen on the battlefield at the hands of one of his kind because he has tried to prevent them from going to Earth and putting an end to humanity themselves. He’s somewhere outside of Heaven and that’s why he’s dying and his last wishes to Shane are not to come and save him. He is not pressing him anymore to go to Heaven. He simply states that he wishes he could hold Shane’s hand once more, because that had been what he really wanted to get at with these letters. Just hold his hand and be with him. Anywhere Shane chose.

Shane feels like he has fallen into the coldest and hottest part of hell at the same time. He doesn’t even realize that tears are streaming down his face and once and for all disprove the theory that Demons can’t cry. He is clutching the message in his hand and heaves He tries to focus, but all he can do is reach for the ring, hold it underneath his palm and speak Ryan’s name.

He feels comfort. No heat, no cold, no pain. Just sadness and comfort. He opens his eyes. Shane is standing on a battlefield and there is carnage _everywhere_. The chariots of the heavens are destroyed and burning. Angels are dying around him. He sees too many tattered wings to count and he knows his true form must be visible here, but the Angels are either dead or too weak to cry out at his appearance. 

Numb, Shane walks the battlefield. He doesn’t know where to go and he can’t see Ryan in this mess. He doesn’t even know the color of his Angel's wings and he falls to his knees as he realizes how hopeless it all is. 

“Ryan… I just wanted to hold your hand, Ryan. It’s all I ever wanted.”

Something touches his shoulder and he flinches at the thrum of angelic essence under skin. He doesn’t know what to expect, maybe someone is going to smite him, but he still turns his head, slowly. 

It’s not an Angel he knows, but they seem kind and they have an open face.

“I’m taking care of the wounded. I think I know who you’re looking for.”

Ryan’s at the sick bay. He is lying on his back on a simple linen sheet. h´His armor has been replaced with a light tunic and his beautiful golden wings are so torn that Shane wonders if that’s what his own had looked like, right before Uriel had ripped them off.

 

Ryan’s dead.

 

Shane falls on his knees, buries his face in Ryan’s chest and _wails_. He has never experienced grief before and he is sure he has never felt a pain like this. It’s not even comparable to any physical trauma, because even when you were gutted, the burn of the cuts and rips and tears would mix with the sudden hollow and empty feeling and that heat was so different to how cold he feels right now. He knows he will not be consolable, he will die right here, outside of Hell and Heaven and become nothing, because being nothing was better than being this.

An Angel touches his shoulder again and Shane knows it’s the same one but he can’t stop crying, he can’t stop holding onto Ryan’s robe and he can’t lift his head because then he would have to see him dead and remember every single message his Angel had sent him, so hopeful at first, then confused, then sad, then… nothing.

“He’s not completely gone.” The Angel whispers in his ear.

Shane can’t answer, but he hiccups. It’s enough.

“His essence has been drained, but he’s still in there.”

Shane finally tears himself up and stares at the Angel.

“What… How… Can I….?”

He can’t form words and it hurts his throat to speak. The Angel is beautiful and radiant and their form burns Shane’s eyes because Demons are no longer allowed to look at the creation without pain. He suddenly realizes, that Ryan’s form never hurt him.

The Angel smiles softly.

“Only the one he loves the most can bring it back. A touch of their hand would be enough. After all, we are made from nothing but Love.”

Shane nods and swallows. The one Ryan loves most. He needs to find them, needs to get them here, but he doesn’t know who it would be. Could it be one of the Angels? They aren’t “siblings”, because they are not born of blood or grown in a womb, but they do love each other, right? Or maybe because Ryan loves humans he has fallen for one? Would they still be alive? Could Shane maybe get a soul from heaven to restore Ryan? Fuck it, he would have to try and if it destroyed him, so be it. 

He nods firmly and the Angel steps back. Shane looks down at Ryan’s form and he has to clear his throat over and over because the crying has broken his voice, which again makes no sense to him. He doesn’t even have a physical throat to ruin. Yet, grief very much affects the spirit.

“I’ll find them, Ryan. I‘ll bring you back, I promise. I swear to you any oath and if after it, you still want to take me with you, then I will go, even if they smite me right in front of the gates and it will be worth it.”

He clutches Ryan’s hand and squeezes. It’s neither cold nor warm, but it still feels dead and empty. For a second.

Then Ryan gasps and Shane, who has been looking at him is nearly blinded when bright light flares in his eyes and mouth and he feels the tug of _something_ as if he is pulled closer to his Angel and then the hand grabs his so tight he is sure he is going to lose fingers - and Ryan shoots up in a sitting position.

Shane’s dumbfounded. Part of him wants to scream and hug Ryan and pour his heart out and apologize over and over again for his behaviour. But…

Ryan is back. Ryan’s essence has been restored. _Ryan’s essence has been restored after Shane touched him._

When the Angel meets his eyes, Shane realizes he is crying again and it’s a little embarassing to note that this is going to be the first time Ryan sees him again and Shane is covered in tears and snot. Ryan doesn’t seem to mind, though, because his eyes light up as he sees the Demon and he surges forward to pull him into a tight hug. Shane buries himself in Ryan’s arms and he clutches onto him, ready to not let go for at least a millenia.

Finally, Ryan releases him enough to look at him and laughs softy, wiping at the Demon’s wet face to dry it a bit.

Shane sniffles. He says the first thing he can think of:

“I’m sorry.”

Then he says the second thing he can think of.

“I am the one you love most?”

Ryan’s laugh is nothing short of the much described choirs of heaven and Shane knows he will never let go of his Angel’s hand again.


	5. Jealous! Shane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> @tryingmybesttobeaesthetic wanted some Jealous Shane he he

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Jealousy, a bit of pining  
> Rating: T for swearing

“Shane? Are you listening to me? Shane! Hey!”

It takes for Sara to snap her fingers right in front of Shane’s eyes to get him out of his trance. He looks at her, wide-eyed and immediately feels like an asshole. Sara has been one of his best friends for years and even though dating her didn’t work out, he valued her as a person. Not listening to her and phasing out instead was _really_ not a way to show that.

“Fuck.” He says eloquently. “I’m sorry. I was completely out of it. What were you saying?”

She gives him a seething side-eye and Shane feels very small all of a sudden, which is a laugh because he looks twice as big as she does.

“Sorry.” He says again.

“What got you so out of it?” Sara looks over her shoulder and Shane instantly wants to yell at her not to look but he can’t because that would get everyone to notice. He wants the ground to open up and swallow him whole when she looks back at him with that smirk and a dancing eyebrow.

“Someone’s getting really friendly with Ryan, huh?”

Shane sucks in a breath through his teeth.

Ryan Steven Bergara. Believer, Producer, all around great guy, amazing arms, best laugh in the whole world and the target of Shane’s affections for about half a year. Probably more. Shane bites the inside of his cheek. He has never told Ryan because he doesn’t want to freak him out but it’s hard to not get jealous when Ryan is being fawned over by beautiful men and women. The crew of models they brought in to do some sort of clothes swap nonsense or maybe it was a Q+A, has the priviledge to have Ryan show them around and they seem happy with that. They also seem happy to openly show that they find him attractive. One of the guys that looks like the people Shane only saw on posters when he still worked at Abercrombie laughs a little too loudly at something Ryan said and _settles his arm around Ryan’s shoulders_. Shane feels his nostrils flare. The hand on Ryan’s arm squeezes experimentally, probably feeling firm muscle and Shane knows his palms are sweating, but even some bullshit Eminem line about spaghetti can’t make him laugh right now. The women aren’t much better. They hang on Ryan’s lips as he’s talking and it takes a loud snap for Shane to realize he broke the pen he was holding.

He looks up and Sara is still standing in front of him. She looks a bit done, which Shane understands because he keeps fucking ignoring her and he really has to make up for that soon or else she will kick his ass. He drops the pieces of the pen on the floor and then bends down to pick them up. For a second he catches Ryan look over and right at him but then he’s behind the next desk and prepares to hide for the rest of the day.

“Really, Shane?” Sara sighs above him. He grits his teeth and picks up the broken pen.

“Shut up!”

“You should just tell him how you feel, he’s obsessed with you anyway.”

“The fuck he is. Look at those people!” He glares over the edge of his hiding spot and wants to bite right into the top of the desk when one of the women takes Ryan’s arm and very obviously presses her boobs against it. “Why would he go for “Bone Stilts” when he literally could have a harem of people who get money thrown at them because they look hot?”

He meant it as a joke but something ugly twists his heart and stomach and he can’t decide if he would rather curl up and die or race over there and throw the models out of the next window. He knows he is being ridiculous and those people didn’t do anything. Who can really blame them for thinking Ryan is attractive? He _is_ attractive.

Shane really wants to stab those Adonises and Aphrodites in the - well not the neck. Maybe the ankle, just so they can’t spill themselves over Ryan like that.

“Shane… Just talk to him.”

He feels guilt. Guilt for being a shitty friend to Sara. Guilt over being a shitty friend to Ryan because he has feelings for him and won’t say anything. Guilt because he really just imagined hurting random people who are just being nice, if a little too on the flirty side. He’s acting out. At least he could act out of love?

Shane gets up. Fuck it. If Ryan thought he was being stupid, he could live with that. He tosses the pieces of the pen in a trashcan and nods at Sara.

“I owe you so much coffee.”

She just rolls her eyes.

“I’ll add it to your tab. It’s long.”

He nods again, straightens his shoulders and marches toward the group.

“Hey Ryan!”

Man, his voice is a bit too loud and in between the dulcet and sweet tones of those pretty people it sounds croaky and weird. Ryan doesn’t seem to notice because his eyes widen and he smiles widely and somehow manages to untangle himself from the unusually grabby guests.

“Hey buddy! What’s up?”

“Can I go through some Postmortem footage with you? I found something and need your opinion.” He sighs inwardly and adds the polite: “Or are you busy?”

Ryan looks around for a moment, contemplating.

“You guys can find the stage again, right? It’s not far. Sorry I gotta see this.”

They all express their disappointment over seeing him go, but nobody dares to make him stay and Shane allows himself to believe it might be because of the glare he is fixing these people with.

When they’re walking away, Shane slips an arm around Ryan’s shoulders even though that gains him a bemused look from his friend. If this is going wrong, at least he has a memory of how it feels walking with Ryan like this. He smiles at him as they round a corner.

“Sorry man, I don’t really have any footage to go through. I just kinda wanted to get you away from them.”

“What? Why? They were really nice.”

“Maybe a bit too nice.”

Ryan frowns at him. He looks at the arm around his shoulders and Shane pulls it back, guiltily. Shit. He brings his hands together behind his back so he doesn’t twiddle around on his fingers. Ryan is silent for a minute, as if contemplating. Then, he finally speaks.

“Shane… are you… jealous?”

Ryan seems confused, like he doesn’t quite understand, but there is a bit of a smirk on his face. It’s still overshadowed by disbelief and wonder, but it’s there. Shane knows he’s blushing and he stares at the ceiling. Hard.

“Yes.” He finally admits. “Yes I’m jealous. They were all so flirty and beautiful and it fits because you are beautiful. I mean models are usually tall-”

“Shane-”

“-but you fit right in with them you all looked so great and I sat-”

“Shane!”

“-over there looking like… well. Sloth-like, floppy, penguin nosed, that thing. I originally wanted to ask you out today but I feel like I totally blew it. Please don’t hate me, I’ll never touch you again just say the word and-”

“Shane you really need to learn to listen to people sometimes.”

He stops and looks at Ryan. His friend his shaking his head with a fond smile.

“So. Where did you want to take me?”

_Oh._

Shane feels a grin spread on his face.

“Really?”

“Hey if it gets Shane “No Distress” Madej this worked up, it has to be important, right?”

“Right.” Shane grins at him stupidly. “I could pick you up at eight?”

“Sounds good, big guy.”


	6. Ricky Goldsworth and C. C. Tinsley - Partners in Crime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mexican-with-a-laptop asked:  
>  Holy shit I love your works so much, you're such an amazing writer!! ❤️ I was wondering if you could do a little Ricky/C.C in some partners in crime au?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Crime boyfriends, Fluff, mentions of smut, Writer!Tinsley not Detective Tinsley  
> Ratings: T

The car parked on the side of the small but tidy street is the only occupied one. The tall guy on the passenger seat burrows his hands in the opposite sleeves of his trench coat to keep his fingers warm and sighs.

His partner behind the wheel looks at him with a bit of a sneer.

“Cold, sugar?”

“It’s been raining for three days straight, the weather gets me in a mood. And don’t call me ‘sugar’.”

Ricky chuckles and drums his fingers on the wheel.

“Don’t tell me you’re getting cold feet?”

“It’s my hands that are cold. And no, I‘m not.”

C.C. Tinsley leans his head against the window and closes his eyes. He’s not exactly sure what posessed him to come here today. Well, that wasn’t true. He is sure _who_ posessed him: The handsome guy to his left. Leave it to Ricky Goldsworth to catch his eye and make him follow him down the rabbit hole of crime.

A hand in his hair brings his attention back. Ricky’s gaze is unusually soft as he pets his scalp and searches his face.

“If you don’t wanna do this, stretch, it’s cool. I’m not gonna make fun of ya.”

C.C. smiles a bit. Wasn’t that the cutest thing ever.

“Nah. I’m good. I know you like nice things and you deserve them, babe.”

He cups the hand on the side of his face and brings it in to kiss the palm. Ricky’s smile widens a little.

“You’re fucking sweet, you know that? Usually men complain when I keep spending their money.”

Tinsley shrugs and smirks against Ricky’s palm.

“I’m a writer, I know money comes and goes. It’s no big deal as long as you’re happy. I just wish it could be less… aggressive. I guess I’m more into organized crime.”

Ricky laughs.

“You read too much trash, you should read your own stuff more.”

“It’s just the rags, Ricky. I’m not a bestselling kinda guy.”

“That’s fine. Once this is over I’ll book us a suite even King would be impressed by.”

C.C. laughs. 

“The only writer you could think of, eh?”

“Hey in my line of work you don’t have time to read much…”

“That’s fair.”

Ricky leans over the console to kiss him. C.C. instantly brings up his hands to cup the other man’s face and he feels the tension drain from his body. He is so fucked. Ricky Goldsworth could probably make him kill a man and Tinsley would do it because, fuck, if this man looks at him with adoration and pride and - yeah, a bit of lust, too - he is _gone_.

“I think, I’m gonna keep you, sugar,” Ricky whispers against his lips as they part. “You’re my favorite ever.”

C.C. smirks.

“I told you not to call me ‘sugar’. It makes us sound like Bonnie and Clyde.”

“Is that so far off?” Ricky’s eyes are twinkling.

“No, but I don’t like the ending.”

Ricky shrugs. One of his hands is running up C.C.’s thigh.

“It’s what happens in this line of work.”

C.C. dips his head to kiss him. He keeps it chaste and warm and soft enough to feel Ricky’s smile against his lips. He locks eyes with him as they part.

“I know. But I want you to live long. I have this dream of growing old with you and I would like to know if it’s as good as I imagine.”

Of all the things in the world, after all the things they have done in the privacy of Tinsley’s flat or all the hotel and motel rooms, this is what gets Ricky Goldsworth, robber and gentleman thief, to blush.

“Well, shit, sugar.” He says after a pause, still staring right into his partner’s eyes. “If that isn’t the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard. What are you, a poet or something?”

“Writer.” C.C. corrects, pulling him in for another kiss. 

When they finally part, it’s to put on the masks they dig out of the bag. Tinsley checks if their weapons are loaded and Ricky starts the car, leaving it running as they get out.

In the end, they make it out of town with two bags of expensive jewelry, a very happy Ricky who sprouts a sparkly earring and a pretty content C.C., who is leans back in his seat to stare at his newly adorned boyfriend.

He knows, Ricky is going to “make it up to him” for the hard work, because Ricky knows, that C.C. doesn’t exactly _love_ robberies. But in the end, he feels like it was all worth it when he sees the pure glee on Ricky’s face whenever he holds something precious or unaffordable. It’s suspiciously similar to the look he gives Tinsley after they made love that night - and C.C. refuses to call it anything less than that - which probably means that he’s not opposed to the thought of growing old together.

Leave it to C.C. Tinsley to catch his eye and make him follow him down the rabbit hole to something... at least close to a normal life. Ricky wonders if there’s a ring in C.C.’s size somewhere in their loot and he doesn’t even feel foolish about it.

“Illinois is too cold." He says. "Let’s go to California. I want beaches and the sun.”

“Wherever you go, I’m gonna follow, babe.”

“See?” Ricky rolls back on top of his partner and nips at his bottom lip. “Sweet as sugar, Mr. Tinsley.”


	7. Hybrid AU - Winged!Ryan learns to fly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Winged!Ryan learning to fly? Or Shane getting to see pictures of it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m gonna give you a quick preview of an upcoming chapter of [Diurnal & Crepuscular](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15702042/chapters/36491715) first and then add to it because I literally just wrote a piece of that! :D 
> 
>  
> 
> _Shane is shown the family home and coos over baby pictures of Ryan, sees him with his little brother train flying for the first time, safely strapped to one of their parents so they don’t fall and crack their head._
> 
>  
> 
> Tags: Hybrid AU, Flying, Fluff  
> Rating: G

Ryan gulps at the sight of the open field. He just turned six and according to his parents, it’s the perfect time for him to stretch his wings a bit. Both his mom and dad drove him and his brother out here and now, the four of them are standing in the middle of the wide, uncultivated field. His little brother Jake is seated securely on his mother’s hip and she is laughing at him pointing out every sway of the far off trees and the little bugs that keep jumping about in the grass. Ryan swallows hard. He feels like he somehow has to prove himself as the older sibling. But that’s not all of it. If he fails he’s going to be a laughing stock at school. 

He heard before that there are Avians who can’t fly. Sure, there are birds who can’t either, but somehow Ryan has started to fear that he might be the only one in his family who won’t be able to handle flying. He stares up at the wide, unlimited sky above him and swallows again. How is he ever going to manage _that_?

His father seems a lot more relaxed than he is. In general, Ryan’s dad is, as his older cousins would say, a “chill guy”. He helps Ryan to put on the harness, a set of straps around his shoulders and waist that mirror the bigger ones on his dad with the chord between them.

“It’s just for emergencies,” his mom had said when she had presented him with it. “If you were to fall, your dad will catch you. So don’t worry, okay?”

Ryan worries. He really wants to do well and all that worry overlays his excitement to get up in the air. He has dreamed of flying for a while now, hoped for the day he was allowed to get up there. But now that it’s so close, he’s afraid.

His dad puts a hand on his shoulder.

“Okay, Ryan. Ready?”

Ryan swallows down all his fears. _Showtime_ , he thinks and nods. He takes a deep, deep breath and spreads his wings. Both his parents have showed him and explained it multiple times, but still, the first time he beats his wings, he feels nothing. So he does it again. Again. Again. And again.

Then, for the first time he feels something catch on his wings, something that is more than just the air he would bat at his little brother to knock him over till Jake is giggling. Ryan feels light on his toes for a moment and before he can get caught up in the moment, he does it again. 

Next to him, his dad bends his knees for a moment and Ryan mirrors him, still a little unsure. Then, his father shoots up, wing beating harsh and Ryan’s heart is racing as he mirrors him, pushes himself up as if jumping-

His wings pick up a rhythm he’s not controlling. Everything around him is harsh winds and air, air, air. There is no ground below his feet and Ryan gulps as his wings continue to pull him into the air. He sees the shapes of his mother and brother shrink below him but the steady beating of his father’s wings is audible above him and Ryan tries his best to match the speed.

“Very good, Ryan!” His father calls above him. “Keep it up. Up and down, up and down!”

Ryan feels his muscles strain and the wind hits his face, drying the sweat that has built in nervousness and then-

He sees the whole field below them. The wind catches his wings and pulls him up and up and up and he’s not afraid. He’s tethered to his father who shows him just how to tilt his wings to glide across the world and Ryan feels a shout of joy bubble up in his chest, work its way through his throat until it echoes across the field.

Ryan is not a prodigy in flying. But he is damn good at it once he has the time to practice a little.

-

Ryan quickens the beat of his wings as he carefully lands next to Shane. The field is a little yellowed compared to his childhood memory of it, but it’s still pretty. It’s wide and it sings of freedom. Shane has watched Ryan fly and glide and do a little airshow - nothing too extravagant, just a couple of somersaults and spirals - for half an hour now and Ryan is worried that his boyfriend will get bored. But when he hits the ground and looks up, all he sees is admiration and joy on Shane’s face.

He sighs as his face is cupped in long-fingered hands.

“You look amazing out there, babe.” Shane whispers against his mouth. “So strong and confident and fast. How did you learn to fly like that?"

Ryan chuckles and kisses him, slow and sweet. He cups Shane’s face as he pulls away and brings his wings up and in front to wrap Shane in them.

“I had a great teacher. My dad sure knows what’s up.”

Shane laughs and brings their foreheads together.

“He clearly does. Wanna go for another round? I love watching you.”

Shane doesn’t have to ask twice. Somehow, Ryan feels even lighter when he swings himself into the air again, knowing that Shane follows his every move with his eyes.


	8. Beauty Guru / Beautygara AU - Make-up endurance test through sexytimes (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> theawfuledges asked:  
> Okay, this prompt is silly but I love the beauty guru Ryan au more than life, so here goes - what about Shane testing how well Ryan's look can hold up during sex? Like, he hears Ryan recording a video and telling his viewers that this look is totally smudge-proof, it won't crack or run or anything no matter how active you get, and Shane takes that as a personal challenge? ;) (Bonus points if he loves seeing Ryan's makeup smeared all over them both afterward)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Based on [Lipsticks and Let's Plays](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15758637) , the "Beautygara" AU.
> 
> Tags: Beauty Guru AU, Youtuber AU, Established Relationship, Make-Up, Blowjobs, Anal Sex, Rough Sex, Dirty Talk  
> Rating: E (this is some FILTH and I'm proud)

Shane gives the webcam finger guns while the credits of the long story-based game he just finished are playing.

“So, to all the Shaniacs out there, if you played this for yourself or watched a friend play it, feel free to tweet me your outcomes and reactions! I really loved this, the writing is so good that I can overlook the flaws in programming and all that.”

He grins up at the webcam.

“If you liked this video, consider to subscribe, share and comment. Hope to see you tomorrow! Bye!”

Shane gives an exaggerated wink at the camera before turning it off. The words “stream ended” feel like pure relief and he sighs, relaxing in his chair. It had been a good live stream. People really liked the game he had picked and there were a bunch of donations during the stream. In fact, there had been enough for him to call for a break where all he did was read off donations and drink water. He scrolls through the comments and giggles at the “shooketh” comments when he reached the ending of the game. Generally, there is a lot of love. Many, many heart emojis, thanks for picking the game, other people who simply thanked him for being positive. A couple of people who popped in and talked about Ryan’s latest video, the usual. Shane smiles. He never would have expected to date a beautuber. And even if, he really wasn’t prepared for his followers to embrace Ryan the way they did.

It gives him a strangely fuzzy feeling to know that the Shaniacs love Ryan so much. Ryan deserves all the adoration in the world in Shane’s eyes. Then again, he’s biased.

He snickers at he gets up and grabs his water bottle to empty it. Four hours of streaming had left his voice hoarse and dry. He should probably go to bed, but Shane Madej hasn’t become a twitch stream superstar by making good and healthy decisions.

So he gets up and walks over to Ryan’s recording spot.

When they rented a place together, they had focused a lot on both of them having their own recording space. It hadn’t been easy, but with the help of some very crafty friends who had _built them a soundproof wall_ they had finally found their dream home. Shane tries not to think about it too much, because he tends to get emotional when he remembers the day he asked Ryan to move in with him. Their relationship had still been kind of new, if you just counted the “kissing” phase and not the “hanging out for hours and days on end” phase. Shane had been worried they were going too fast but Ryan had instantly hugged him tightly. Shane remembers the feeling of being squished so hard he could barely breathe and just- not caring. He had picked Ryan up and spun him around as if they were in a fucking Disney movie and Ryan had laughed and cussed him out the way Shane loves it.

And now, he can comfortably stand in the door while Ryan is finishing up his video. He looks amazing. When Shane had started to question his sexuality in high school, he had expected that he liked girls for their femininity and boys for their masculinity. Guys in make-up had never caused him to react a certain way until he met Ryan.

Shane guesses, it’s just because of the way Ryan is. Whether his boyfriend emerges from their bedroom in sweat pants and showing off his muscled chest or whether he is wearing mesh and silks, face all dolled up in more layers of make up than Shane can imagine- Shane adores him. Ryan is always beautiful and handsome and magnificent.

He smiles as Ryan says his usual goodbyes and stops the video. He is wearing an amazing combination of eye make-up. Shane will never fully understand all the terms, but it doesn’t matter because his breath still stutters when Ryan turns. The eyeshadow and liner above his eyes forms a wing of sorts, blues and black and white merging into a beautiful swirl and swing. It’s a bit much for an everyday look, but not quite drag queen extreme. The blue is dotted with lighter and darker colors, giving Ryan a look as if he accompanied David Bowie on tour. His lipstick is dark. A deep purple-ish tone that looks almost black and enhances the golden tone in his skin. Shane catches himself licking his lips as he looks at Ryan. His boyfriend is beautiful, there is no doubt about that. But Shane, despite everything his fans might think, is very respectful of Ryan’s work. While he doesn’t understand make-up, he knows how much work goes into a good look and he also knows that kissing your boyfriend while he is in in full make up might ruin the look. So he is simply standing there and admiring the art his partner has put on his face.

Ryan seizes him up and smirks.

“Livestream done?”

Shane nods. His throat is still a little dry but he can manage.

“We got a bunch of donations. I think it’s a reason to celebrate. I could take you to Knott’s Berry Farm this weekend?”

Ryan’s eyes sparkle and Shane knows that the lurch his heart is undertaking means so many things, mostly that he is drawn to Ryan in every way possible.

Ryan laughs and Shane feels himself starting to smile.

“I would love that!”

His boyfriend gets up and walks over to wrap his arms around Shane. He tilts his head back and looks up as if contemplating. Shane smiles down at him.

“What was your project this time?”

Ryan chuckles.

“Smudge-free make up. It’s why I put on so many layers.” He brings up a finger to tap at the corner of his eye. “Nothing will get this look to run down my face.“

Shane feels a tingle in the depths of his stomach.

“Nothing? Really?”

Ryan seems to catch his drift because his smile widens while his lips get thinner. He looks smug now, self-assured and cocky.

“Yes. Nothing. No cracks, no smudges, no running. You could do _all sorts of physical activity_ in this and there would be no troubles at all.”

Shane swallows. Well then, Ryan has not only picked up the ball, he has tossed it right back at him. Shane feels himself smile.

“So, has someone done an extreme performance test for these products yet? Because, well, you know, I want to make sure your viewers get a full on tested product. That’s why I’m curious.”

“Sure.” Ryan’s eyebrows twitch and a smile spreads those beautiful, dark painted lips. Shane wants to lick them, bite them, fuck. He is such a goner.

“Sure?” He manages. “Does that mean someone has done that already?”

Ryan shrugs. “I’m sure they have. But you bring up a good point. I think we should test it ourselves. You know, you’re a good second opinion on this. I would like your-” He falters a bit as he laughs. Ryan pushes up on his tiptoes and his breath tickles Shane’s ear. He gasps as teeth nip on his earlobe and a tongue drags down and up again on his neck.

“I would like your _input_.” Ryan growls into his ear and Shane grabs him, hoists him up as well as he can and feels arms cling to him as he carries his boyfriend to their bedroom.

—

The make-up holds up better than other products, Shane has to admit. No amount of kissing, licking or biting moves the lipstick from Ryan’s lips. Shane gasps his admiration of the color into Ryan’s mouth as his boyfriend moans and undoes his pants.

“Let’s do an endurance test first, big guy.” Ryan groans into his mouth and Shane bites his hand as his beautiful, beautiful boyfriend drops to his knees and lowers his head to shove Shane’s cock into his mouth. Shane twitches and groans, not sure if he should act without permission, but then Ryan smacks his thigh and Shane fists a hand into his lover’s hair and starts taking control, jerking Ryan’s mouth up and down his cock. He looks down at Ryan’s blissed out face while Shane fucks his throat. Tears well up in the corners of his eyes, from the strain, but the eye make up stays where it is. The lipstick is slowly fading with every thrust, Ryan’s luscious lips dragging over the skin of Shane’s cock and he can see them slowly using their dark color.

“Fuck, baby. Your beautiful mouth is too much.” He gasps. “You’re gonna make me come if you keep this up.”

Instead of pulling off, Ryan forces all of Shane down his throat, working against the hand in his hair because Shane is trying to hold him back. Ryan’s hands grope his ass, dip a finger between the cheeks to push against his hole while Ryan’s beautiful throat is spasming around Shane and Shane gives in; whining and groaning as he grabs Ryan’s head and fucks down his throat a few times before spilling his load into his boyfriend’s mouth.

Ryan seems to be in no distress at all. He’s groaning when he gets enough air and otherwise, he is swallowing around Shane so perfectly the taller man wants to weep. It’s times like these where he is baffled that Ryan picked him of all the people he could have had. Ryan deserves someone to buy him satin sheets and carry him above everyone on their hands.

The thoughts about his own inadequaty fly out of the window when Ryan pushes up on his knees and kisses him, harsh and hot and desperate. Shane tastes his own cum and the expensive lipstick and he grabs his boyfriend’s face to smear the tears in the corners of Ryan’s eyes across the eyeliner and shadow. His thumbs feel like they are getting caked in the colors, but he doesn’t want to open his mouth because he is focused on kissing Ryan.

Finally he gets his head together enough to pull away.

“What do you want, baby?” He groans against his boyfriend’s lips while Ryan still tries to suck and bite on his lips. “I’ll do anything. Suck you off. Eat you out. Fuck, you can top if you want, just tell me.”

He tears open his eyes and gasps as Ryan pulls him into another kiss. For a couple of seconds, they kiss with open eyes, something Shane considered really awkward until now. Ryan’s eyes are so dark. They always are, but they are downright black now with his pupils blown wide and arousal burning somewhere in the darkness.

“Shane. Fuck. I need you to fuck me. Wreck me.”

Shane swallows. He doesn’t look it but he is pretty vanilla when it comes to his boyfriend. Maybe it’s his infatuation and love, but most times he just wants to lower Ryan onto a soft and comforting surface and lavish him with kisses. Tonight is different, however. Ryan wants to get fucked, hard and to the point of desperation and Shane is definitely not the type to deny him.

Slowly, carefully he lowers Ryan into a nest of pillows he prepared on their bed. The lube is in reach, luckily and he allows himself some time to work his boyfriend open, even though Ryan gets impatient by the time Shane pushes a second finger in.

“Fuck- Shane- Stop with the super careful act. I want it rough. I want you to make me cry and scream in pleasure!”

Shane swallows hard and pushes the fingers deeper. Ryan jerks underneath him.

“I get it, babe. But I don’t want to hurt you. That-”

He looks down and sees that Ryan bites back a complaint, maybe a sour comment.

“I could never live with that, sorry.”

“Fuck.”

Ryan wraps his arms around Shane’s shoulders and pulls him down into a kiss.

“Okay, babe. I get it. Sorry. Thank you. Whatever- _fuuuck_. Just please, please. I want you to fuck me. Fuck me hard, Shane. I need it tonight.”

Shane swallows at the amount of dirty talk. He shoves a third finger in without much of a show.

“Okay. Okay Ryan- Fuck. I want to give you what you need. Wanna make you feel so good.”

He smears some lube on his free hand and jerks Ryan’s half-hard dick. His thumb rubs precum all over the head, then onto Shane’s palm and he leans over to bring the hand up and cup Ryan’s face.

“Just wait for the hit, babe. I will ruin this make up. Cause the production company to scratch their well-groomed heads.”

Ryan snorts a laugh, but he hisses as Shane's hand cups Ryan’s cheek. Their juices and the lube get smeared all over Ryan’s face while Ryan chases Shane’s thumb with his mouth, his tongue. Some of the eyeshadow is flaking, there are sparkles of white and blue on Ryan’s temples and cheekbones.

When Shane fucks into him, he more feels than hears Ryan stifling his moans against his collar bone. He starts to move earlier than he planned, because Ryan grabs his ass, wraps his legs around him and cusses and demands for Shane to fuck him, keep fucking him, never stop fucking him.

They gaps and groan and curse into each other’s mouths as Shane picks up speed. He sees Ryan’s sweat mingle with the colors on his temples, sees tears burst from those beautiful eyes as Ryan’s moans of “yes, fuck, harder, please, _Shane_ ” echo in his ears, he sees streaks of black cover Ryan’s nose after his lover brushed his face against Shane’s chest.

Shane shoves two fingers in Ryan’s mouth and despite the first reaction being a gag and a soft bite, he soon groans as his fingers are sucked on, soft breaths hitting the wet flesh with each thrust he manages.

He pushes into Ryan, deeper and deeper until the wet, tight heat around him clenches and then starts to milk him. Ryan underneath him is babbling by now, going on and on about how fucking good it feels with his spent cock dribbling the remains of his cum stash over his stomach. Shane swipes some up and into his mouth before kissing Ryan, mixing their tastes and he is shocked by his own actions and how filthy he has gotten-

When he comes inside of Ryan, his boyfriend is holding onto him for dear life, rocking up against him to somehow take Shane even deeper and he is-

A mess.

When Shane collapses on top of Ryan and they try to catch their breaths, he feels how absolutely _covered_ in filth they are. Cum is sticking to both their bellies and chests, their legs, Shane’s cock and Ryan’s ass. They are sweating, breathing hard as droplets of sweat roll down their back and arms.

Ryan’s make up is ruined. The lipstick is almost gone, most of it smeared over his cheek and chin. There is spittle everywhere and Shane realizes he made his boyfriend drool while fucking him. A burst of pride and affection fills his chest at that. Ryan’s extravagant eye make-up has melted. His cheeks and temples are smeared with the stuff. Not a single dot has survived, but there is still a gradient to all of it, despite being unintentional. With the runny eyeliner, Ryan looks like he is the protagonist of a dystopian apocalypse show.

Shane bends down to kiss him. It’s a sweet kiss, full of affection and he sighs when Ryan slowly settles his arms around Shane’s neck.

They part and look at each other. Ryan is laughing a bit, instinctively wiping at his make-up and staring at his palm when his hand comes back smeared with blues and blacks.

“Sorry, darling.” Shane sighs and kisses Ryan again. “It’s not quite as stress proof as advertised. You should ask for your money back.”

He moves to pull out but Ryan wraps his legs around him and keeps him inside.

“Maybe we should redo. See how much residue stays after a second stress test.”

Shane swallows hard and lowers himself next to Ryan to gather his boyfriend in his arms.

“If you say so, babe. You’re the boss in the make-up department.”

Ryan groans and it sounds sort of like “damn straight”, but Shane feels like it would ruin the mood to make a quip about the word “straight” in the saying. Instead, he simply recalls Ryan’s blissed out and _wrecked_ face and starts to move his boyfriends body up and down his slowly re-hardening cock while their bedroom again is filled with moans, creaks and whimpers.

—

When Shane wakes up the next morning, his boyfriend has tucked his head into his neck. Something is off, Shane notices. Ryan is awake. He blinks a couple of times and sees a phone hovering above them. It takes him a bit to realize that Ryan is taking a selfie.

“What are you doing?” He rumbles softly.

Ryan doesn’t respond. Instead, he hands Shane the phone.

Shane has to focus first, but then he feels every bit of breath leave his body.

 

On the picture, he and Ryan look truly and blissfully fucked out. Ryan’s eye make up is nearly gone, except for the black and blue smudges that drag over his temples and the single deep purple spot on his bottom lip. Shane, however, has not quite expected the way he looks.

There are lipstick marks all over his neck and jaw and he remembers the spots where Ryan has kissed him while he fucked his partner open. Single splotches of blue and black are all over his face, a big smear on his forehead where he might have wiped off sweat after cradling Ryan’s face. There are two blotches on his chest, fitting perfectly when he imagines Ryan burying his face right there while Shane fucks into him hard and desperate and needy.

He looks at Ryan again, takes in the black tear tracks in eyeliner and his chest swells.

“God.” He whispers. He wants to say something about how hot Ryan is, something like ‘I’m so glad you get us to experiment’, a show of gratefulness for their sex life and how Ryan keeps it fresh.

Instead he says:

“God. I love you.”

Ryan’s eyes sparkle warm and brown under the remnants of the make-up.

“I love you too.”

They kiss again and Shane tastes the echo of Ryan’s lipstick. Maybe the stuff held what it promised, he thinks as he rolls on top of his boyfriend. He should send the studios a thank-you letter.

Then Ryan bites the side of his neck and Shane decides it’s too early to think about make-up. His attention is needed elsewhere.


	9. Buzzfeed Video gets them together / Valentines Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> hey i’m a slut for the prompt “they had to do x for a video and now they’re a couple” could you take a gander at it? ly!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kinda wrote something like this with [Best Friends get married for a week](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15368460) before. This is a slightly different take.
> 
> Tags: Valentine's Day, Fluff, Candy (kinda)  
> Rating: G

Valentine’s Day is coming up and Ryan doesn’t need the sarcastic text with a whole lot of gun and knife emojis from Zach to understand the sentiment. Yeah, the day kind of sucks when you’re single. But Ryan can’t help it, he’s a hopeless romantic at heart. Even now, waking up alone in his bed he can’t hate the day. Why would he hate a day made for love? Who cares if it’s a commercial thing! He feels like he should take someone out on a date at the beach, bring a picnic basket and laugh about silly little things.

He’s not _in love_. But he loves the _idea_ of being in love.

Maybe one day.

He sings in the shower to the tunes of one of his playlists and he doesn’t think about the fact that it’s mostly love songs.

 

-

 

Work is alright. Sure, there are a bunch of Valentine’s Day decorations, pink and red and white paper hearts everywhere, but Ryan secretly loves it.

Shane is sitting next to him, drumming his fingers on the desk in a rhythm Ryan doesn’t follow and it’s surprisingly relaxing. He barely notices someone coming closer to their desk.

It takes Kelsey – Darragh, not Impicciche – to smack her flat hand on his desk for him to pay attention to her.

 

“What? Huh? Sorry?”

Kelsey just snorts.

“Dozing off at work? I thought you were professional, Ryan.”

Ryan huffs and shuffles in his seat.

“Shut up. What do you want?”

Kelsey grins. There is a hint of bitterness in it.

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but based on what I know you’re single?”

Ryan frowns. It feels like a loaded question.

“Yeees?”

Kelsey leans on his chair. She looks like she just gave into something she regrets.

“So. You’re single. On _Valentine’s Day_.”

Ryan’s left eyebrow twitches for a moment.

“Yes?”

Kelsey grins smugly.

“So is Shane.”

Ryan glances over at his best friends and finds his seat empty.

“Wanna review cheesy Valentine’s Day gifts with him?”

Ryan blinks. He has no idea what Shane’s stance on Valentine’s Day is. He hasn’t said anything so far, so Ryan assumes he is pragmatic about it. Shane probably thinks it’s just some capitalist bullshit and that you should show the person you love that you love them every day of the week. It makes sense. But Ryan likes cheesy stuff. So, if anything, the video would make for good banter-based content.

“You know what? Sure. Why the fuck not.”

Kelsey’s grin widens and Ryan has the feeling he has made a mistake.

 

-

 

He’s sitting next to Shane and Shane has just opened a big, striped, heart-shaped box.

“Oh boy, I remember these!”

His friend’s voice is part excited and part mocking and Ryan snorts.

The box is filled to the brim with cheap sugar hearts and Shane is already digging through them. Ryan turns to the camera.

“You know, they look cute as a gag or decorations, but I know nobody who actually likes them.”

He looks over just in time to catch Shane shove one of them into his mouth.  His face goes quickly from anticipation to disappointment and Ryan frowns in sympathy.

“Yeah, uh, I was gonna say they taste like-”

“Chalk.” Shane finishes the sentence. “They taste like fucking chalk.”

Ryan is laughing as Shane dips to the side and bends over to spit the candy heart into the trash can that mercifully stands within reach. Meanwhile, Ryan digs through the hearts. He catches one of them and smirks and waits for Shane to come up again.

“Hey, Shane.”

Shane looks at him.

Ryan holds up one of the weird little hearts. This one’s yellow.

“Smile!”

The caption on the heart and Ryan’s readout of it seems to do its job. Shane snorts and then turns away to giggle a little.

Their final verdict is that the candy hearts are cute in concept, but terrible when it comes to them actually being candy.

 

-

 

Red roses are cute. Ryan stands with that sentiment. A dozen red roses are a nice gesture, whether it’s Valentine’s or any other day. Girl’s like flowers. He amends that statement.

“I think _people_ just like something colorful and alive that smells nice!”

Shane, the realist and skeptic and pessimist, of course disagrees:

“They’re probably gonna die within a day or so.”

Ryan rolls his eyes.

“Sure. If you say so. But that still means that you had a whole day of enjoying them after I gave them to you. That has to account for something, right?”

He originally meant to keep the sentence neutral. But somehow, the they’s and them’s slipped his mind and he is now imagining surprising Shane with a dozen red roses on Valentine’s Day.

 

It doesn’t feel as weird as it probably should.

 

They work their way through a set of perfumes and body care. Shane actually agrees with him on the topic. If you know your partner’s preferences and products, it’s a very thoughtful gift. If you just buy them a random cologne or perfume, you imply that they smell.

The two of them share a hearty laugh at the scenario and Ryan notices how he curls in on himself while laughing and falls against Shane and Shane- is a solid support against him, holding him up and even placing a hand on his back.

 

On jewelry their view is also the same: Buy your partner something you _know_ they will like. Don’t just buy a random necklace. Shane looks ridiculous with the golden chain around his neck. The pirate earring looked better.

 

They are busy digging into the chocolates the producer has placed in front of him when Shane pops the question.

 

“Hey Ryan. I know it sounds weird… but… do you want to go on a Valentine’s date?”

Ryan pauses in the middle of chewing a Lime Lush chocolate.

“Are you… serious right now?”

Shane only nods. Ryan can see how nervous the other man is, because he tries to swallow nothing and fiddles with his fingers.

“Sure.” Ryan feels a lot of breath leave his lungs. “I like Valentine’s Day. I would love to go out.”

Shane blinks too fast and Ryan realizes how emotional his co-host is getting. He swallows hard and decides to wait.

 

-

 

Much later, after a nice dinner at a Spanish Tapas place, Ryan grabs the back of Shane’s head and kisses him, because Shane is clearly worrying as he tries to explain that he has liked Ryan for months, maybe years, that he was waiting for the right opportunity and that he was scared, _fuck_ , so, so scared…

 

Ryan kisses Shane within an inch of their lives and he tastes candy hearts and chocolate and Spanish food and _Shane_ …

Ryan loves Valentine’s Day.


	10. Protective! Shane and injured Ryan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Ryan getting knocked out at a haunted location and protective!shane

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Protective!Shane, slight injuries, a tiny smidge of angst, fluff, First Kiss  
> Rating: T

It’s not what is supposed to happen. Ghosts, demons and all that stuff aren’t real and Shane _knows_ that, has known it for years and years. There is no evidence. None whatsoever.

Ryan _told_ him. Over and over. Something is pushing him, shoving him. Ryan hears “Leave, now!” in the static of the fucking stupid spirit box and Shane rolls his eyes. It’s dumb. He can’t hear anything but annoying hissing and the skipping of channels. Ryan – again – says that something shoved him and Shane laughs at him because it’s _really_ ridiculous. He catches the look on Ryan’s face, however, so he decides to shut up for a while and let Ryan do his thing. They descend the stairs, simple, undeterred when suddenly, Ryan yelps and falls past him. Shane wants to make a grab for him, catch him as his partner is falling – but he misses and Ryan tumbles down the stairs.

For a second, Shane is frozen in place, heart hammering and acutely aware of all the cameras in play. Then he all but throws himself down the stairs.

“Ryan? Ryan! Ryan!!!!”

He drops on his knees next to Ryan, fingers searching for a pulse – thank god, he is still here – and then his breathing – he is here, he is alive, oh  _God thank you, I’m sorry for not believing whatever is out there please help him_ – and then he very, very carefully checks Ryan’s neck.

Shane dimly notices that the crew is calling and ambulance while his fingertips check every single vertebrae in Ryan’s neck. Nothing seems out of the ordinary, considering his very basic knowledge, so what he does is curl himself over Ryan, hold his ghoulfriend’s face in his hands while everyone else is losing their shit. Shane doesn’t care. He is whispering:

“To whatever is out there. Whatever or whoever pushed him. I will find you, I will hunt you down. I don’t care if I believe in it or not… You piece of shit, I will find a way to destroy you, to torment you. Whatever you are, I will destroy you. Not before making you pay, of course. You think you’re safe because I don’t believe in you? I don’t give a shit. You will pay for this.”

He holds onto Ryan until an ambulance arrives. Shane feels numb as he is pushed away from Ryan and has to watch how people check the other man’s pulse, his breathing, his eyes. He is strapped to a stretcher and pushed out of the house and Shane is equally happy and terrified about it. He follows the paramedics  like he’s in a trance , asking questions they cannot yet answer.

One of them knows their show. She takes one look at him and whispers: “Look, I normally can’t allow this, but just get in the ambulance with us and- Just sit and try to keep calm, okay?”

Shane nods. He has never been this glad to be some sort of public figure.

  
  


-

  
  


When Ryan wakes up, Shane still has his head pillowed on the hospital bed and holds onto his friend’s hand. He’s not at the point where he is embarrassed or gives into bi panic anymore. 

He has known for a while, but the truth of the realization hit him the moment he saw Ryan passed out and injured.

“I love you.” He whispers hoarsely, fully aware that it’s not fair to spring this on Ryan. Ryan, who just came out of unconsciousness, who will surely say that the ghost of the house attacked him, pushed him down the stairs as if ready to murder him-

Ryan squeezes his hand and pulls it up to kiss Shane’s knuckles.

“You’re here.” He says, softly.

“Yeah.” Shane swallows. “I’ll always be here.”

Ryan blinks. Shane takes a deep breath.

“I don’t care anymore. Tell me whatever you believe in. I’ll be here. I’ll fight them.”

Ryan blinks again, but then bursts into a wheeze.

“Are you serious? Shane, dude, you can’t fight ghosts!”

“I will.” Shane swallows. “For you, I’d do anything.”

“Wha-?”

Ryan’s eyes are so big and dark and Shane is so glad he has the privilege of  seeing them again.

“So… what? You’re about to become a Boogara?”

Ryan’s grin is kind of in the shit-eating category. Shane doesn’t care.

“If it keeps you from being hospitalized? I’d get Boogara tattoo-ed on my chest.”

Shane sees Ryan swallow hard. He knows he might be misinterpreting things, but he is already about to bare his heart to Ryan. So, fuck it.

He leans in and kisses Ryan’s forehead. Shane squeezes his eyes shut.

“I love you.” He whispers again, this time against Ryan’s skin. “I don’t want you to get hurt. I want you to be save. God, I love you so much.”

It comes out all in one breath against Ryan’s forehead and Shane prepares to be pushed away, to be called delusional or otherwise weird. But he just sits there, his lips  _still_ pressed against Ryan’s forehead, hands braced on either side of his friend’s body as if he can somehow keep everything else at bay like this.

Then, Shane finally hears Ryan speak again.

“You don’t have to feel obligated to save my ass out there, Shane. I can take care of myself.”

Shane swallows.

“I know. But- Uhm-”

He dips his head and brushes their foreheads together.

“I know you can hold your own. I know you’re strong. I know you have all sorts of things that will probably hold off a ghost. I know – for myself – that ghosts are not real… But. I-”

“I know.” Ryan’s voice is soft. “Is it true?” He glances up at Shane’s eyes and seems almost hopeful. "Do you really love me?”

Shane can’t take it. He has to kiss Ryan. He pushes forward against these soft, supple lips and sighs, knows it might only be for a moment, knows that Ryan might be riding an adrenaline high and knows this is bad-

Ryan drags Shane into his arms and kisses back, harsh, demanding, clearly into it.

Shane ends up braced over Ryan’s form, not even really touching but rather shielding him from the outside world.

“Ryan?” His voice is barely a whisper.

“Yes, Shane?”

“Whatever you believe in, I will protect you from it, okay? So no more weird rituals without help, no more of all the Ouija business. I don’t care. I know I don’t believe but you do. And I would rather look like a fool than leave you behind.”

Ryan swallows hard in front of him.

“Shane.”

Hands on his face. Warm, loving, real.

“Shane, oh god, I love you- I- Fuck.”

“I’m here.” Shane whispers. He moves in and towers over everything laid out before him. “I will always be here, love.”

Shane is ready to fight. Fight through every single layer of hell if he has to. It doesn’t matter if they exist. He’s here and he has Ryan and if  _anyone_ tried to fuck with him, Shane would handle it.


	11. Ricky Goldsworth and C. C. Tinsley - Enemies and Lovers / Protective! Tinsley (slightly NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Could you write C.C. and Ricky being in a relationship despite being on opposite sides of the law, and one day C.C. sees someone about to kill Ricky (either with a gun or with something heavy, idk) and C.C. shoots them right before they can and Ricky looks up in time to see it happen, and he's in awe at both the fact that C.C. would kill someone to protect him, and the cold look that was on his face as he looked at the wouldbe killer before shifting back to his normal soft expression as he looks at Ricky and asks if hes okay and if he got hurt or not

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Goldsworth/Tinsley AU, Detective! Tinsley, Criminal! Goldsworth, Established Relationship, Mentions of violence, mentions of smut  
> Rating: I'd say M, just to be safe.

From day one, C. C. knew that getting involved with Ricky Goldsworth was going to ruin his life.

He was a pretty good detective. He had a reputation. He was clever, ready to take risks, careful not to harm civilians. Tinsley was a name that got linked to the police, to reliability, to professionalism.

But Ricky Goldsworth was different. The guy, for the lack of a better description, liked pretty things. He lived in a town for two years, taking over the Mayor’s house, making the Mayor – for the lack of a term that described the situation well – his little _bitch_ – while Ricky lived the life of a celebrity. He got fed, cleaned and coddled whenever he wanted, which seemed to be just the thing the guy was after. C. C. was impressed the first time he read the file about the guy. Goldsworth was a bad guy, sure, but he wasn’t a killer. He stole, he lied, he extorted. All illegal things, but in the end, he didn’t murder, maim or cause other long term problems for people. C. C. was almost charmed by the intellect of the guy.

Then he _met_ him.

The first time he saw Goldsworth, the guy was in a cell, clearly upset that he had to exchange his pinstripe suit for a prison jumpsuit. Somehow, he still cut a great figure in it. They talked for a while, their conversation drifting away from the topic on hand way too fast. Tinsley didn’t mind. He took a lot of notes on Ricky. It wasn’t until he returned home that he realized, that the guy had already wrapped him around his finger.

Afterwards, life got complicated.

Goldsworth dipped in and out of prison, buying his freedom more than once through ratting out other criminals. Sometimes Tinsley wondered if Ricky had paid off a couple of men of the law and a ridiculous jealousy burned in his stomach when he wondered _how_ the man paid them off. 

-

The worst thing was that Ricky Goldsworth was _into him_. Their first talk was filled with flirtations and innuendos. Whenever Goldsworth was out of prison, Tinsley would receive saucy messages on note cards in his mailbox. Once or twice, a gift would arrive at his agency. Chocolates, flowers, a new tie. Tinsley always knew that he could expect to find a monogrammed card with the initials R.G. in the gift boxes. He ate the chocolates, despite the advice from multiple people not to. They were delicious.

-

One night, when he is about to leave his office, he almost runs into the man in question. There is no warrant against him right now, so Tinsley isn’t sure what the game is. He still bets on it.

They go drinking. They talk. He doesn’t remember what about. He does, however, remember Ricky’s tongue in his mouth and a hand down his pants. He remembers the distinct thought that he will hate himself once morning comes. He also remembers ignoring the thought.

-

Afterwards, he can’t get rid of Goldsworth. He shows up in his flat, his car, his _head_. Tinsley can’t help it. He is pretty sure he is obsessed and he knows it’s bad, really bad.

Even if he was a civilian, falling for Ricky Goldsworth was just stupid. He was a man who knew what he wanted and what he wanted was a comfortable, beautiful, first-class life. Tinsley couldn’t offer him that. He could offer to fuck him into the mattress and Ricky didn’t seem averse to that. But C.C. Tinsley was only a little private eye and Goldsworth wanted and _deserved_ so much more.

Tinsley is about to pull back. He knows he has to, before he breaks his heart forever.

But then the letters pile in.

Ricky Goldsworth has some sort of reputation in the underbelly of L.A. and someone has noticed. Someone has developed a little… crush on Goldsworth and made it very clear that they don’t want anyone else to touch the man. Goldsworth merely laughs whenever he drops off a letter at the police station or Tinsley’s office. He doesn’t see how C. C.’s heart aches at the thought of Goldsworth on the ground, bleeding out, just so that the faceless stalker can claim him. Ricky doesn’t see it. He doesn’t see it when he rides Tinsley that night, he doesn’t realize that Tinsley kisses his forehead before getting out of bed the next morning, he doesn’t see the detective get dressed and grab his old service revolver.

-

Ricky isn’t stupid, however, Once he is about to be lured into the trap, he quickly recognizes the person who tries to end is life. In true fashion, he puts them down, crushes their self esteem and waltzes right over them with his words. Goldsworth is about to grab the weapon from his “admirer” when he notices the finger around the trigger tighten. Ricky is smart, he’s a survivor and Tinsley can even see from afar the possible modes of survival after being shot that Ricky’s brain supplies as he tries to move back.

Tinsley doesn’t try. He just shoots. The stalker drops like a bag of flour and Ricky looks at him.

For a moment, it’s completely quiet. Ricky’s eyes seem to widen slowly.

“Fuck, Tinsley.” The low, growling voice breaks the silence. “What was that?”

C. C. puts the gun away.

“I prevented a criminal from murdering a useful witness. Simple question of a life versus a life.”

His voice is calm. His demeanor is calm. The hand that pockets his gun, however, is shaking hard. He looks up and is startled to see Goldsworth stand right before him.

“Your face when you killed him… I don’t think I have ever seen something like that before.”

Tinsley swallows hard.

“Something like what?” He knows his expression is calm again, mostly emotionless.

Ricky Goldsworth cups his face in his hands. 

“You murdered him in cold blood. You never did anything in cold blood…”

Tinsley is shaking. He should move away but he can’t. Ricky’s eyes search his face, but the usualy cool and calculating manner is replaced by surprise and a hint of reverence.

“You killed him for … me.”

Tinsley swallows hard and says nothing.

“So many men have done wonderful things for me. Nobody has ever … killed for me.”

Ricky pushes up on his tiptoes and kisses him. Tinsley is shaking and he knows he can’t grab the man or else he will _know_. Instead, he pulls back a little.

“Are you okay? Are you… are you hurt?”

His eyes are wrenched shut but he can hear the chuckle that is _so fucking Goldsworth_ and he clenches his hands into fists.

“I’m great. Thanks to you.”

Another kiss. Tinsley shudders and feels himself melt into it. Ricky pulls back only a tiny bit.

“I think, I know what that look means, now.”

C. C. doesn’t ask, he chases Ricky’s mouth.

“You love me.” Goldsworth sounds surprised himself. Maybe a little amused, but also a tiny bit touched. When C. C. slips his tongue into his mouth, Ricky buries his fingers in the taller man’s hair and kisses back like he just almost died.

Which, if C. C. was being honest, was fair.


	12. Shane carrying Ryan Fluff

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> I just want Shane to carry Ryan please give me that in a non sexual way

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Fluff, minor injuries, can be read as platonic Shyan  
> Rating: G

Ryan is a bit stunned.

 _He_ is supposed to be the strongman. Shane doesn’t work out. Shane hates sports. Shane has long noodle arms and everyone and their grandma loves to compare him to the wird floppy inflatable guys in front of gas stations.

Then shit happens on location and Ryan has a possibly broken ankle, a swollen foot - that doesn’t fit in his shoe anymore - and a long, long way to walk back to the car. He clings to Shane’s shoulder and hobbles along, jumping on one foot while using Shane to keep himself upright. 

To his surprise, his friend has not made a single joke about him jumping at a noise on the haunted farm, only to step into a rabbit hole or something similar. Ryan had felt his foot twist with his leg staying in place and the pain, while bearable, was a bit too much to stand on. He grits his teeth as he keeps hobbling next to Shane. The soft, earthy underground is bad to hop on, but he doesn’t want to complain. Then, his remaining good foot gets caught on something and he falls over. Ryan is sure he is about to smash face first into the ground or at least bruise his hands badly, when an arm catches him around his chest.

“Jesus, Ryan. Watch out, okay?”

Ryan swallows hard. Shane pulls him back in a sort-of standing position. He looks up at his coworker, surprised that the other man actually caught him in time.

“Sorry. I mean, _thanks_. Sorry.”

He buries his face in his hands and groans. This sucks. They will probably have to call the filming for the episode off. Which means they have to revisit the location and call their bosses and rearrange a new sighting and speak to a bunch of people… It’s going to suck.

Ryan drops his hands, feeling a bit miserable.

“Sorry.” He says again. “I kinda ruined the episode. Now we have all this extra work.”

Shane scoffs loudly.

“Ryan, come on, that’s not what matters now. Right now, we should get you to a doctor. And since I’m the only one around, that’s my responsiblity now!”

Ryan is about to tell him that he can take of himself, thank you very much, but before he can speak, one of Shane’s arms settles around his back and pushes him so he is bending his knees a little and there is an arm under his thighs and-

With a swoop, Shane stands up and pulls Ryan in his arms. Ryan gasps and gabs onto Shane’s shoulders out of instinct. For a second, he expects to fall, expects Shane to fold under his weight - he isn’t exactly heavyset, but he has muscle and muscle tends to add to someone’s weight. But Shane only grunts a tiny bit and adjusts Ryan’s weight in his arms.

“Okay. I got you. I can do this.”

Ryan wants to snap at him, yell at Shane to put him down, push against the man’s chest and struggle free… But he realizes that Shane isn’t exactly being weird here. 

Ryan’s ankle is ruined, whatever it will take to fix it will be a job for a medical professional. Shane, even when carrying Ryan is quicker than Ryan hobbling along. And… also…

He relaxes just a tiny bit in Shane’s arms as the big guy carries him out of the haunted farm. It’s… nice. Ryan flushes a little. He gets to be close to Shane and Shane shows that he cares. It’s almost sweet.

Ryan closes his eyes and tucks his head under Shane’s chin, determined to blame it on nausea or dizzyness later. Shane chuckles above him and seems to hold him a little tighter for a moment.

“Almost there, Ryan. Don’t worry. We’ll get your foot figured out and then we’ll get back to our ghost hunt. Can’t have them mess up your body and get away scot free, right?”

Ryan should punch him. Instead he chuckles.

“Sure. If you keep giving me lifts like these, I might be able to get back here before next week.”

Shane is laughing at that. The rumbles in his chest warm Ryan’s entire body. He feels so oddly secure, it’s almost embarrassing.

“I would carry you to the end of the world, Ryan.”

It comes out very soft and Ryan swallows. Well then, that’s something they can talk about later. Right now, he can see the crew running towards them and he holds onto Shane’s shoulders as the other man is carrying him to safety.

It’s nice.


	13. Demon! Shane saves / protects Human Ryan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Ryan getting attacked by a ghost/ghoul and seriously hurt and demon Shane having to fight it off and take care of him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Demon! Shane, Protective! Shane, Description of major injuries  
> Rating: M, for injuries and blood?

It’s quicker than anything Ryan has ever seen. Shane is standing next to him, making a quip about the “decor” and then, there is a shadow where there should be light and Ryan loses the ground under his feet. He drops on his back and before he can catch his breath, he sees the large mirror fall from the wall.

_No._ He thinks. _Please. Not like this_.

He manages to bring up his hands in time to shield his face but he hears the shattering above him, even before the mirror has touched any part of him and then shards fall into him. Glass and fake silver digs into his body, his stomach and chest as the shards keep falling and he knows there is a malevolent force behind it that drives the shards deep, deep into his body, destined to find his heart, his lungs, his stomach- ready to kill him and add him to the collection of restless spirits in this place. He gasps as the sharp, burning pain hits him, as he feels his clothes get drenched with hot blood, as he hears just the hint of a cackle somewhere apart from the plane of existence he lives in. Ryan blinks. He tries to keep his gaze fixed on the ceiling and ignore the shattered frame of the mirror around him and the pieces stuck in his organs.

_Shane_. He thinks. _I’m so sorry I was right._

“What have you DONE!”

Ryan shudders on the ground. He still feels his blood seep out of him and he is not even sure he really understood the words he just heard. Maybe he is growing faint already. But if he had to describe it, he would say that it sounded like Shane and not-Shane, layered over one another in some sound editing program, as if something sat behind Shane and added to whatever his friend was saying.

Wow, blood loss really makes you feel cold, he muses as he is staring at the ceiling and his body starts to shiver. He knows he will die and he is truly sad about it. Maybe he should tell Shane about how he feels. It seems unfair to Shane, but at least he won’t keep up the lies that way.

“Shane?”

Something in the room rumbles, there is a slight tremor in the ground. Then he hears a whimper that doesn’t sound human.

“I’m sorry-” A terrible voice rasps. “I didn’t know he belonged-”

Then the voice _burns_ in screeches and terrified whines. Ryan blinks. He is sure he heard the pits of hell for a moment, if hell really exists. He hopes it doesn’t, because he isn’t sure if he has earned his way into heaven yet.

“Shane.” He whispers again and suddenly, there is a hand cupping his face and another touches his chest, close to where the worst of the pain sits.

“Shane… I’m so sorry. I wanted to tell you-”

He ignores all the shushing and cooing noises above him. Of course, Shane is trying to keep him from talking till the ambulance arrives. But Ryan knows he’s dying. So he keeps talking.

“I love you. I wish we could have shared a life together. I’m sorry I’m already leaving you-”

Warm lips cover his own and Ryan shivers. Shane’s hands hold his and there is a warmth that floods into Ryan, something that doesn’t feel like it’s of this world and when he opens his eyes, he sees the blurry outline of Shane who pulls back after kissing him. He could swear that Shane has horns. And wings.

Funny. Ryan always imagined Demon wings to look like Bat wings. But he sees feathers. Large, protective. And suspiciously well groomed.

Shane whispers words and Ryan tries to listen. It takes him a while to realize that Shane isn’t speaking English. Ryan wants to ask, really really wants to-

But he is so fucking tired.

-

He wakes up again. He hasn’t expected to, if he’s honest. Ryan looks around.

Hospital rooms aren’t exactly comfortable. It smells of disinfectant and pain and death. Ryan hurts but not as bad as he has expected. A warmth in his torso fights against the piercing and tugging and stabbing that has happened to him.

Ryan turns his head. Shane is sitting next to him, head pillowed on Ryan’s bed and Ryan’s hand held in his. Ryan swallows.

He reaches out and starts to pet Shane’s hair. Somewhere, in the back of his mind, he recalls the hallucination he had, Shane, large and powerful with wings and horns, protecting him, helping him, kissing him-

Ryan smiles down at his friend.

“Oh Shane…” He whispers. He can’t help himself. Ryan runs his fingers through Shane’s hair. “If you… only knew.”

Slowly, carefully, Shane lifts his head and Ryan’s breath stutters to a halt.

“I know.” Shane looks like he’s in pain. Weakened and sick where Ryan feels new strength and healing thrum in his body.

“What are you?” Ryan whispers as Shane leans in to kiss him.

“Does it matter? I failed. I never wanted you to get hurt…”

“You didn’t fail.”

Ryan grabs Shane’s collar and pulls him down.

“I’m here. I’m still here. You’re here. And I love you.”

Shane’s breath hitches as Ryan kisses him.

_Who’d have thought…_ his brain muses. _Demons can get breathless._


	14. Co-Workers try to set them up but they are already dating in secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Co-workers trying to set them up but they’re already secretly dating

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Secret Relationships, Set-Ups, Shenanigans  
> Rating: T

“Hey Shane, check this out.”

Zach half sits on Shane’s table and knocks two cups with pens and the Gene plush onto the ground and Shane lifts both his eyebrows as he gives Zach a look. It’s ignored. Instead, Zach shoves a phone in his face.

Shane glances on the screen, expecting a cat picture or something, but instead it’s a collage of pictures of him and Ryan. Most of them include both, sitting next to each other on set or talking on location. Someone has edited the colors of the pictures and given them more warmth and Shane scans over them. Sitting in the pub with Ryan, listening intently while he is talking. The hug they gave each other when they tried to figure out how someone was shot by the person hugging them. There are other pictures peppered in there, pictures that are not of him and Ryan but _could be_. Two hands clasped together, fingers intertwined. Two people embracing, their size difference about the same as the one between Shane and Ryan… and so on.

Shane looks up at Zach. He’s not exactly sure what the other man is getting at, so he is very, very careful.

“Okay?”

Zach gives him a crooked grin.

“Did you know that the fans think that you and Ryan would make a good couple?”

Ah. For a second, Shane had been worried.

“I’ve heard it once or twice, yes.”

“What do you think of that?”

Shane gives him a pointed look.

“I think people should keep their fingers and noses out of other people’s relationships.”

Zach opens his mouth, closes it, frowns, opens it again.

“Jeez, fine. You’re not in the mood for jokes today, I get it.”

Shane is about to say that Zach hasn’t made a single joke yet, but instead he shouts after him:

“Hey at least pick up the mess you made!”

“Ah, so, so sorry, Shane!” Zach walks backwards, still away from him. “But my back, you now, no can do. Oh, there’s Ryan, hey Ryan, can you help Shane for a minute? Yeah? Great! Bye.”

With that, Zach passes Ryan who just came back from the coffee maker with two cups in hand. Ryan only blinks and then looks after Zach for a moment before joining Shane.

Shane is on his hands and knees and is picking up his shit and Ryan crouches down next to him to help.

“The fuck is up with Zach?”

Shane huffs a laugh.

“I have no idea. He’s being weird.”

-

Behind a cubicle wall, Zach and Kelsey D. stare at the two men who are now sitting next to each other on the ground, chatting and laughing while they pick up Shane’s office supplies.

Zach sighs.

“I think that was a failure.”

Kelsey smacks him on the shoulder.

“Hey, no giving up yet! My plan!”

-

Kelsey invites them to a drink taste test. Ryan forgot what the exact wording is but it’s somewhere on the line of “Strangest drinks on the internet”. Most of them are bearable. All of them are _immensely_ alcoholic.

Shane coughs next to him as they try to get the shot down. Ryan has already forgotten what's in it, but there is a hint of pickle juice that just tastes worse than anything. It’s not good. Ryan makes a face and can practically hear Shane shudder next to him.

“Uh- ew. No. Nonono I would _not_ drink this ever. At all.” He says, trying to force the taste out of his mouth.

“Yeah, agreed, it tastes like…” Shane thinks and then looks at Ryan. “It tastes like you burped but while getting acid reflux at the same time.”

Ryan makes a face.

“You’re right that’s exactly what it tastes like. What the fuck, internet?”

 

They banter along, getting progressively more drunk which is, of course, a bad idea for a Wednesday, but at least he gets to suffer with Shane and doesn’t have to do it alone.

 

It’s not until later that Kelsey reveals that all the drink testers can also join her for a “Drunk People…” video where they probably will have to do something that is tough on its own and way harder while drunk.

“Okay! What do we have to do?”

Shane has his hands on his hips and stands in the recording spot, relatively confident. But Ryan can hear the light lisp in his voice and sees the flush in his cheek. Both of them are relatively buzzed by now. The drinks had tasted bad but the alcohol still had the usual effects.

 

Someone throws them a sheet of paper.

 

“Friend Yoga.” Shane reads with a stunned expression and Ryan groans.

“Oh god, not that shit.”

Shane is giggling next to him as he turns the paper in his hands and tries to decipher the pose the two people on the illustration are in.

“That stuff is hard enough if you’re sober! And you’re supposed to do that with someone your height! I can’t balance out _this_ :”

Ryan gestures towards Shane accusingly but Shane gets a lost in a fit of drunk giggles as he is still trying to understand how the fuck the pose is supposed to work.

 

They both give in, eventually, and Shane lies on his back, muscles shaking and straining while he tries to hold up Ryan by the shoulders while Ryan tries not to lose balance on Shane’s knees and crash on top of him.

“What is this supposed to _do_?! Ruin friendships through severe injuries?” Shane grunts out and Ryan is wheezing and wobbling and they barely manage not to tumble into one another.

-

Kelsey makes a face and sucks on her teeth in disappointment. Eugene claps her on the shoulder reassuringly.

“Don’t worry.” He says. “I have been a wingman so many times, I know what to do.”

-

Shane tries the doorknob again. It really doesn’t open.

“Ryan?”

“Hm?” Ryan’s voice comes from further into the storage. They are in the process of moving some old stuff from Ghoul HQ to their prop closet so they can place a few of the gifts the fans sent them on the set. But now, on their last trip back, the door of the storage apparently refuses to open and Shane pushes his shoulder against it, feeling absolutely nothing give way.

“I think the door is broken. Or the lock, either way, we’re locked in.”

“What the fuck?”

Ryan glances around one of the shelves and watches as Shane demonstatively twists the doorknob.

“It won’t open.”

“Jesus. This place is falling apart.”

Ryan pulls out his phone and calls maintenance. They tell him it will be half an hour at least and for a second, Shane can swear he hears a giggle outside.

 

“Hello?” He calls out. “If anyone’s out there, could you get someone to let us out? The door is stuck.”

It’s quiet for a moment, then he hears the voice of Eugene.

“The door is stuck? Oh, shit guys. Okay I’ll get someone. Just, chill and… I dunno, don’t make out in panic or something, okay?”

Shane frowns at the door.

“Eugene… What the hell?”

But there is no answer.

He looks at Ryan who looks very suspicious.

“Huh.”

-

When the door is opened, Eugene throws in a glance over the maintenance woman’s shoulder and lets out a huff of disappointment.

Ryan and Shane are sitting with their backs against a shelving unit and they are _playing cards_. For a second he wonders where they found them, but then again the prop closets carry a bunch of random shit. He is surprised it’s not Monopoly.

Both guys look remarkably like they didn’t have a violent make-out in close proximity and Eugene slumps away, clearly annoyed.

-

Ryan is editing something for Unsolved when three people step up to his desk. He sees Shane move in his periphery, taking his headphones off and Ryan follows suit.

 

“So.” Zach starts and looks at Eugene and Kelsey. “We… kinda have a confession to make.”

He keeps staring at his two friends and Kelsey finally rolls her eyes and groans.

“We’ve been trying to set you up last week. Zach tried to hint that you would be a cute couple and gave you a… well, not very effective push. I thought alcohol would lower your defenses and Eugene thought you just needed some space to bang it out. Because, I’m not sure if _you_ noticed, but everyone else thinks you have some serious sexual tension going on. And… romantic too, I guess.”

 

Shane is wheezing behind Ryan and Ryan cups a hand over his mouth to hide his own grin.

 

“And the three most single people who think long standing relationships are bullshit tried to set us up? What, is Ned sick or something?”

He gets three sour looks in return and Shane behind him cracks and he is laughing uproariously, causing Ryan to break into giggles as well.

“Yeah, yeah. You guys laugh.” Eugene says with a grumble. “But that doesn’t change that you two have this… chemistry.”

“No, no it doesn’t.” Shane says and Ryan looks over to see him wipe his eyes.

“Wait… what?” Zach blinks and looks between them. Ryan takes pity on him.

 

“We’ve been dating for almost half a year, Zach. We just don’t… you know, make up in the cleaning closet or bang in public bathrooms.” He snorts again as he sees three jaws drop.

“What, you never thought about just… asking?”

 

Someone sitting nearby goes to grab a camera, because the sight of the Ghoulfriends laughing at three very stunned employees is a scene that would at least make a nice instagram. Before they even leave the office area, they can hear Eugene, Zach and Kelsey start shouting at each other and at Ryan and Shane. Most of it sounds like “What the fuck?!” It’s answered by more laughter.


	15. Shane gains clairvoyance and Ryan is smug

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Could you do: Shane suddenly gets the ability to see ghosts and after testing it out to make sure he hadnt just gone crazy, he tells Ryan and proves it to him, and Ryan is appropriately smug (which Shane anticipated, because yeah, fair) and then they realise that ghosts just seem drawn to Shane now and harmlessly follow him around and Ryan finds it hilarious cause its just so ironic lol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Seer! Shane, Clairvoyant! Shane, Established Relationship, Banter, Ghosts  
> Rating: T, I guess

“What are they doing now?”

Shane groans in exasperation.

 

It’s not for the camera this time, there are no cameras. There is no crew. Just Ryan and him. And… the fucking… ghosts.

 

Shane has always said that if he one day saw some compelling evidence, he would concede. He would join the Boogaras and work on the study on how to see or hear or at least measure ghosts somewhat. But this-

This is _stupid_. He can’t work with this. He can’t do a scientific study on the whole thing if he is the only one who can see the ghosts. If he were to talk on the show about it, he would look like he is either joking or hallucinating and both doesn’t sound very good.

-

It had started after a week of being sick. He had fought a pretty serious fever and if not for Ryan, he isn’t sure how he would have survived the week. His boyfriend stayed with him almost the entire time, placing cool towels on his forehead, making him food – well buying and heating it up – and helping him sit up at night when the coughing fits threatened to suffocate him.

Shane had been so grateful that Ryan had been there, even though he kept worrying he could get Ryan sick in the process. But finally, finally, the fever had gone down, the medication had worked and he woke up one morning realizing that he could smell Ryan’s shampoo when he buried his nose in the soft dark hair and things hat gotten back to normal.

 

Except… they didn’t. It didn’t start on location, funnily enough. It started in a relatively old house that had opened up a coffee shop in the bottom floor. They had sat together, cuddled on one of the dark green couches there when Shane had seen a movement out of the corner of his eye. He had turned, paused and upon realizing what he was seeing, dropped his coffee. Ryan had yelped and jumped up when the cup hit his lap, but Shane didn’t even react when he was shouted at, not even when Ryan shook him. He was staring, just-

Staring at the silver, wispy foggy shape that looked suspiciously like a woman in a dress from the 20’s who winked at him and blew him a kiss when she caught him staring.

-

Since then, it had only gotten worse. Shane eventually had to tell Ryan. He prepared for it. He sat his boyfriend down and swore that he would be absolutely honest, that he wasn’t kidding or mocking or anything. Ryan had looked almost scared, but when Shane slowly and with a shaking voice started to explain, his eyes had widened in surprise, disbelief and then – of course – glee.

Ryan was _smug_ about it and Shane can’t even be mad at him about it. It’s “I told you so” in the most delicious way and Shane knows, he would do just the same. But Ryan is still a good person and he is still there for him, because he takes Shane’s hands and kisses his forehead and thanks him for telling him. And then he makes plans. Plans to figure out Shane’s new abilities and maybe even how to prove them.

 

Shane asks if Ryan wants a proof too and all he gets is a shrug and the words: “You didn’t believe in ghosts, but you believed me, right?” And that’s it.

-

“They keep following me. I kind of hate this.”

Ryan stifles a giggle.

“For the record!” Shane says quickly. “I’m not scared. Because… you know, they are pretty much still like thin air, none of them can throw shit or touch me, like- ,“ he reaches out and tries to touch the elbow of the older man that hovers near him. It goes through without resistance and Shane rubs his fingertips together.

“I don’t even feel weird or cold when I try to touch them. They’re like… holograms or some shit.”

Ryan takes his hand.

“Maybe they follow you because they can see you. I mean, I get it- and I’m sorry, but it’s really fucking hilarious that they are so drawn to you after everything you’ve said to them.”

Shane gives him an exasperated look and Ryan squeezes his hand to placate his feelings.

“I mean… remember Sixth Sense? The ghosts freaked the kid out, but most of them just wanted someone to see them. It must be horrible, being stuck here for decades or centuries with nobody acknowledging you, don’t you think?”

Shane sighs.

 

Ryan is right and even though he won’t say it out loud, Shane is really glad he is not alone in this.

 

“Ryan, I can’t go in public with this. People would think I’m either lying or crazy. You know that, right?”

Ryan sighs and then nods.

“I know.”

“Okay. But… whenever the cameras are off, just… Ask me whatever you want. Because right now we are surrounded by four ghosts and you are _not_ freaking out and panicking and while I love to give you shit for that, I prefer you like this.”

Ryan gives him a small smile.

“Do you think we can help them?”

Shane blinks.

“You want to help them?”

Ryan shrugs slightly.

“I mean… if they have any unfinished business that keeps them from moving on… maybe we can help them with that?”

“They don’t talk to me, though.”

“Well, maybe they can show you?”

 

Shane takes a deep breath.

 

He looks around. The old man wears a lot of tweed. It’s been some time since the people got more… texture, but Shane has gotten good at placing people in their respective eras – thank goodness for that obsession with history.

“So, uh.” He starts. “If anyone has a problem with this guy being my life partner, you can leave because I’m not helping homophobes.”

He waits, staring them down, but gets only blinks and waiting expressions in return.

“Baller. Then let’s start with you.”

He turns to a woman in a maid uniform that looks like she might be from the 50’s.

“Can I help you with anything that would allow you to move on and… uh, rest?”

 

She stares at him for a moment and then heads off towards the master bedroom. Shane follows, her, still holding Ryan’s hand. He looks over his shoulder and sees the other ghosts following and rolls his eyes.

 

Ryan starts giggling. Even though he can’t see them, he clearly gets what’s happening.

“Shut up.” Shane grumbles without real malice, but he smiles when Ryan jogs to keep up with him and jumps to press a quick kiss to his cheek while they’re still walking.

“I’m proud of you, big guy.”

Shane feels warmth spread through his chest.

“Hope you don’t mind me being a weird ghost magnet now, babe, because our future seems to be quite… high-spirited.”

“Terrible. Horrible. Absolutely disgusting.”

“Love you too.” Shane snorts before returning his attention to the maid.

 

 _Well then,_ he thinks. _Let’s ghostbust._ Nicely. Through communication or some grown-up shit.

He can do this.

With Ryan by his side, he can do anything.


	16. Demon! Ryan turned by Demon! Shane to save his life - Demon Husbands

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> how about: ryan has recently become a demon cause he was about to die and he sold his soul to shane, who was already a demon, because he didnt want to leave shane yet. so now shane is showing ryan how to work his new powers and how to hide his new demonic look. (and maybe shane teases him for having small nubby horns, cause a demons horns grow the longer theyre alive and ryans tiny horns are oddly adorable on him) just sweet mentor!shane showing new demon!ryan the ropes with his new abilities

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Demon! Shane, Demon! Ryan, Gun Violence (kinda), Major Character Death / Transformation, Demon powers, flying, Fluff, Getting together, Getting married (kind of)  
> Rating: I'd say T

Of all the things that could kill them on location, Ryan has not really thought of this.

 

He thought about ceilings caving in or the floor giving out or the roof dropping on their heads. Falling down the stairs. Getting crushed by a chandelier. Having an old fridge fall on you.

Then there was the possibilities of ghosts and/or demons ripping them apart in all the ways Shane lays out so _cheerfully_ that Ryan gets goosebumps just standing next to him in the empty rooms.

 

In the end, he has expected that if he dies because of Unsolved, it’s either the environment or something supernatural.

Not a redneck with a shotgun.

 

They haven’t been followed around by locals since the Keddie Cabin murders but this time it was just as scary. Someone passing by in their van, eyes fixed on their little group with a very shut off expression. It freaked him out a little. Even Shane was uncomfortable, following the man with his eyes as he passed.

“That looks like trouble. Maybe… maybe we shouldn’t sleep here?”

Ryan chews his bottom lip.

“No, we don’t have enough evidence yet.”

Shane opens his mouth, most likely to disregard everything they found so far and Ryan hisses “shut up” before he can say anything. Shane, to his credit, shuts up.

-

Ryan can’t sleep, of course. Shane, that asshole, is snoring next to him as if they are hanging at a Disneyland hotel and aren’t rolled up in sleeping bags in a haunted house filled with the souls of innocent victims.

He gets up and stumbles outside to take a leak. It’s not like he will be able to pee in the bathroom, feeling watched every step of the way. He doesn’t have a shy bladder, but ghosts are a different thing. Ryan yawns as he walks back to the house, hopeful to get at least an hour of sleep. But then, he hears footsteps. He turns around.

 

“You city folk really don’t know what’s fucking good for you, right?”

Ryan opens his mouth as he stares down the double barrels the man is pointing at him. It’s the same guy that drove by the place earlier.

“I- People know we’re here. Our crew filmed you earlier. Listen- whatever you want, I’ll leave I-”

“I really don’t care.” The guy says. He sounds tired. “I’ve been keeping the secrets of this place for fifty years now. If I go to jail tomorrow, at least you’re not taking them with you.”

Ryan wants to say something but the blast and the light of the explosion of two loads going off swallows the sound-

 

Ryan braces himself, surprised he even can think about bracing himself. There is a ringing in his ear and something around him shifts as if he is losing balance. He feels sick to his stomach for a moment and wonders if he’s already been shot and the shock just skipped all the pain and went straight to numbness.

He slowly opens one eye. The guy is still holding the shotgun. The blast of both shots going off is still there, light, smoke, everything seems just frozen in time. Someone is standing next to Ryan and he carefully glances over and up.

 

It’s Shane. There is something ragged and broken around his head, as if he is wearing a crown that got tossed into an incinerator for a while. His face is the same, except for the strange ripple of shadows that pass across his skin once in a while. He turns to look at Ryan and Ryan swallows. His eyes are the same color, but his pupils have stretched wide and resemble a goat.

 

“You’re going to die.” Shane says. He sounds almost… disappointed.

Ryan glances all over his friend’s face, up to the broken crown – or are these horns? Spikes? A broken halo? - and down at his eyes again.

“Well.” He finally says, feeling a surprising calm fill him. “That sucks.” He runs a hand through his hair, sighing deeply.

“You could have told me earlier that you’re a fucking demon, Shane. I thought… I thought we were friends?”

Shane looks actually sheepish for a moment.

“You wouldn’t have stayed friends with me if you had known.”

“So.. is Unsolved some sick game to you?”

“No.” Shane looks away. “Many of us hang out on earth… hell isn’t exactly _fun_. And this world has food and amusement parks and cats…” He sighs. “And you.”

Ryan blinks and makes a noise of confusion as he stares at Shane.

“Well.” Shane tilts his head and looks at him. “I agreed to the show to just hang out with you, because I do like you. I’m glad to call you my friend. We’re not incapable of feelings, you know? We also don’t want to be alone.”

“Okay.” Ryan says slowly. “And all that stuff about… taunting demons and ghosts?”

Shane smiles a bit to himself.

“It’s partially to mess with you, I admit. But also, Steve is a piece of shit and I know that me taking the bridge ruined his enture century.”

Ryan blinks in disbelief.

“You’re shitting me.”

“I’m as honest as can be. Which is more honest than you would believe considering the stories about my kind.”

 

“Well.” Ryan finally says. They have been standing next to each other in silence for a while and he has been pointedly ignoring the shotgun that is still firing a killing shot at him.

“Thank you for telling me. I’m glad you were my friend, too, for the record. But it kind of still sucks that I’m dying.”

Shane turns to look at him. His expression seems pained.

“You can’t… you know.” Ryan makes a wavy hand motion at the man as if pretending to magic him away.

“No. Because you’ve already been hit. I just pulled you… I don’t know how to name it in your language. It’s that “space between spaces” thing. Ethereal plane. Something.”

“Ah.” Ryan swallows hard. “That, sucks. Still, thank you. It’s… not bad here. I wish I could stay.”

Shane bites his bottom lip and looks away.

“What?” Ryan tilts his head and tries to catch his eye.

 

“There… is a way you could. But you would have to make a deal. Which… probably isn’t what you want because, let’s face it, even if you don’t hate _me_ , apparently… you still fucking hate demons and I get that.”

Ryan breathes in.

“Are you… saying I would sell you my soul?”

Shane cringes.

“It’s not just like that. Humans can’t survive this.” He gestures to the shotgun. “Demons can. But in order for a human to become a demon, you have to hand off your soul. And without a soul, you can’t go to the afterlife.”

Ryan swallows.

“Would I go to hell?”

“Well, for your new… job, I guess, yeah. But not as in, wheels and bone-grinders and that shit. That is just for people who are really shitty and you’re a good guy. Still, no soul, no heaven, no paradise and that shit. So if you’re looking for that, you’re on the way right now.”

Ryan blinks a couple of times. He could swear that Shane is tearing up a little.

“So… selling my soul would make me a Demon?”

“Yup.” Shane shrugs. “Sorry, I don’t have anything else to offer. You probably don’t want to spend all eternity with me. Me taking your soul would kinda bind me to you so… you’d probably be weirded out by me. If not right away, then eventually.”

Ryan is still staring.

 

“So… you taking my soul… would basically… marry us.”

Shane snorts.

“Uh. Yeah, I guess you could say that. Except marriage is often defined as a union before god and… weeeeeeeeell…”

He drags out the word, voice rising in pitch and Ryan can’t help it. He starts laughing.

“I think if I went to heaven, I would miss you too much, big guy.”

Shane’s mouth drops open and Ryan could swear he sees the other man – well, the demon – shiver a little as he steps closer.

“So… Shane Madej, if that is your real name.”

“It actually is.” Shane says with the tiniest smile.

“Will you make me the shittiest demon in the world and take my soul so I can punch the lights out of this guy who thinks it’s chill to shoot me in the middle of the night?”

Shane looks down and swallows.

“Ryan… this isn’t a silly little game. This is _forever_. Till the end of time.”

“I know.” Ryan looks up at him. Determined and almost a little impatient now.

“What do I have to do? Cut my palm? Say a phrase? Sign a contract? Shake your hand? Come on, I’ve made my decision so stop stalling.”

 

Shane swallows.

“Are you… blushing?” Ryan starts to wheeze. Why is this situation so hysterical?

“Shut up.” Shane huffs. He reaches up and cups Ryan’s face in his hands.

Ryan blinks and looks up at Shane.

“What are you doing?”

“Well… How are marriages usually signed off?”

“Oh.”

Ryan places his hands on Shane’s chest as he gets it. He slowly pushes up on his tiptoes.

“Yeah.” Shane whispers against his mouth as he leans in. " _Oh."_

-

Being a demon is a lot more work than Ryan would have expected. He thought that maybe a terrifying, painful transformation would happen, where he is gifted a new form, but at first nothing had happened.

 

His lips had tingled and his lungs had burned when Shane pulled away and Ryan couldn’t help it. He had chuckled that this definitely wasn’t the worst first kiss he has ever gotten and Shane had rolled his eyes and smiled.

-

Shane is a strict teacher. Mentor. Sire. _Whatever_. Ryan doesn’t have to use titles with him because this is _Shane_ and Shane thinks traditions are bullshit. He calls Ryan dipshit sometimes, when Ryan messes up spectacularly, but Ryan doubts it’s an official term for a Demon in Training.

Changing his shape is terrifying at first, because Shane shows him how many layers are between looking like a human and their _true form_. All Shane has done the night he had revealed himself was the equivalent of taking off his glasses. There is glamour on every part of his essence and stripping it away is even harder than putting it on. But Ryan will get there, eventually.

 

He asks about Shane’s “horns” eventually. He sees the bent shape, how burnt they look and Shane smiles at Ryan’s suspicion that they are the remains of a halo.

“You’ve always been really fucking clever.” He says with affection.

Ryan reaches up and runs a hand through his own hair, lost in thought.

“Will I not have horns, then?”

The corner of Shane’s mouth twitches.

“You’ll grow them. Give them time.”

 

-

 

Ryan’s _true_ eyes are as dark as they used to be. But there is something in there, swirls of something vast, maybe eternity, maybe a whole universe. He looks at himself in a reflective surface and stares, mesmerized.

“What _is_ this?”

Shane steps up behind him and leans in. Before Ryan can process what Shane is doing, the other demon places a kiss on his hair.

“Everything. And nothing.”

Ryan scoffs, not at the kiss but at the answer.

“Cryptic…”

Shane shrugs.

“It’s all of time and space, if you will. It's around us. But it’s also inside of us. We’re not bound to the laws of physics anymore. I don’t know how to explain it, I never studied that shit.”

Ryan giggles a little and changes the subject.

“You know, you can kiss me if you like. Or hug me.”

Shane shuffles uncomfortably.

“I don’t have the right to that shit just because I’m your mentor. This isn’t some weird vampire rule where your sire enslaves you. You’re still your own… guy.”

Ryan feels a smile spread over his face. It’s oddly warm.

“I know that. This isn’t school, you’re not my fucking teacher, Shane. We’ve been friends for so long and you saved my life. And don’t worry: I’m my own guy and I would prefer it if you kissed me. Because, believe it or not, I do like you, _hubby_.”

Shane makes a gagging sound at the word and pulls a face, but Ryan catches the smile and slight flush underneath.

-

His horns are tiny little nubs. They are lighter than his hair, the color of bleached bone and Shane is _laughing at him_ because of course he is, that bastard.

Ryan kicks him in the shin and the wheezes get interrupted by slight whimpers and pained groans.

“Owww. That wasn’t nice!”

“Oh and you were? Nah, you were being a dick, you deserve this.”

“Ryaaan.” Shane whines as he stands up again, still rubbing his leg. “I’m sorry. They just look so cute!”

“You’re still collecting negative points here, Shane.”

“Sorry, sorry.” Shane huffs another laughter and moves a little closer, carefully as if he is expecting Ryan to kick him again. “Come on, I'll make it up to you. I’ll show you how to bamf, would you like that?”

“ _Bamf_.” Ryan repeats with a blank expression. “What like, Nightcrawler?”

“Yeah.” Shane grins. “It sounds cooler than apparate, beam or teleport, don’t you think?”

Ryan shakes his head.

“You’re so fucking weird.”

It’s really hard staying mad at Shane when you love the big guy, Ryan muses. Shane takes his hands and helps him concentrate, focus-

 

They end up a couple hundred feet too far left, but it’s not a big deal. Shane pokes his head out from behind the building they ended up at and looks around. Then he groans.

“Ryan… really?”

“What!” Ryan walks past him and crosses the street to the Chipotle. “It’s been a while since I had this!”

-

Unsolved goes on as if nothing happened. Technically, to the film crew and other creators and the fans, nothing did happen. Ryan left his sleeping bag at night to use the bathroom and he came back a few minutes later. At least that was what the footage shows.

 

Ryan stares at the screen and feels whatever is nesting deep inside him leak through his eyes, shift the reality the camera had been focused on so, that… other things happened. It’s not manipulating footage, he realizes. He is manipulating what happened right in front of the camera. It feels strange, but he is working well and he hears a pleased hum from Shane who is standing behind him, shielding what’s happening from the rest of the office.

“You’re a natural.” Shane mutters. “Not surprising, though, you were always good at editing.”

Ryan laughs and leans back to look up at him. Shane looks soft, not at all demonic. His glasses are goofy and his hair is all over the place and he reaches out to brush the hair from Ryan’s forehead and he looks incredibly sweet.

 

“You’re cute.” Ryan says. It sounds like an answer to Shane’s statement and the other man huffs and ducks his face in his collar. Ryan just smirks.

He can get one of the really high ups – or… low downs, technically – turn all flustered and cute. He clearly _is_ a natural.

-

His favorite, absolute best new ability however, are the wings. Shane shows him his. Angel wings, torn and frayed and darkened by soot, but still large, still impressive and still functional.

Ryan’s wings are smaller and don’t carry any sign of injury. The feathers look strange and as he runs his hand over it he realizes why. They’re not real feathers, they are steel, beaten so thin that they ripple in their air, fine, fine cuts forming them perfectly and Ryan’s heart drops as he thinks:

_Steel… Planes are made of steel, but wings?! How will I ever fly with that?_

 

Shane puts his worries at ease.

One night in the open desert of Nevada, Shane pulls Ryan into the air with him, glamour tied around them so nobody thinks he is seeing another UFO. Ryan is hesitant at first, content with just letting Shane carry him through the air, but when he spreads his wings he feels every single of those light, metallic feathers catch the wind and he is almost torn from Shane’s grip as the lift pulls him up.

Shane’s cheer is swallowed by the air but Ryan feels it anyway as they begin chasing each other through the air. He can feel his heart, that no longer has to beat, pump excitedly and he tries to grab onto Shane’s shirt, to catch him out of the air and they are both laughing and Ryan feels like he can absolutely spend an eternity like this. Keeping an eye on humans who dwell too close to the abyss, spending the days with Shane still doing their show. Flying at night when nobody else can see them.

 

He finally catches his husband – the word has stopped feeling weird a while ago – and proudly shows off the little horns that are starting to poke out through his windswept hair by now. Shane huffs a laugh as he pulls Ryan close, still in the air.

 

“I told you they would grow, man, no reason to feel all emasculated.”

Ryan scoffs.

“You’re terrible. You should be glad I married you.”

“I am.” Shane glances at him and Ryan wants to stay fake-mad, but he can’t.

“Oh yeah? Prove it, then.”

Shane rolls his eyes and kisses him and Ryan lets out a pleased hum.

 

Yes, he definitely can do this an eternity. Maybe two.

 

* * *

 

 

Bonus:

**Anonymous** asked:

so in the fic thing where ryan became a demon, did he ever get around to punching the guy that shot him?

* * *

The moment they leave the space between spaces and Ryan steps next to the redneck, the blast and echo of the shot rings in his ears. Ryan takes in the man’s face, reading the calm and distanced expression that slowly turns confused until the guy glances over and jumps back in surprise.

“What the fuck! What is-”

“Sorry about that.” Ryan says, already drawing back his fist. “I had to get married real quick.”

He catches a second of utter confusion on the guys face which almost makes him snort before he clocks the man right in the middle of the jaw and watches him fall over like a felled tree. Ryan shakes out his hand, which hurts like a fucker and man, Shane has to teach him a trick how to punch someone with demon powers. Speaking of Shane, the man is standing next to him and chuckles.

“Not bad the whole ‘time and space is my bitch’ thing, right?” He asks and Ryan rolls his eyes and chuckles.

“Yes, fine. You were right, waiting for this moment really made it special.”

“Nice of you to say that.”

Shane cradles his hand and kisses Ryan’s bruised knuckles. Ryan feels himself relax at the sight.

“Come on, big guy, let’s go home.”

“Okay.”

Shane wraps an arm around Ryan’s shoulder as Ryan closes his eyes and concentrates. There is a soft “poof” and they’re gone. Silence falls over the place.


	17. Ryan breaks into ice - Shane warms him up - Clothes Sharing (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> How about Ryan wearing Shanes clothes and he looks so adorable. And fluff or smut and fluff occur. Or Hypothermia where Ryan runs onto some thin ice over a pond or something to escape from a ghost or demon and falls through. And needs cuddles and panicked!shane to make him feel better. Great stuff so far! I really like all the prompts you've answered :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Getting Together, Clothes Sharing, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Getting Together, First Time, Shane takes care of Ryan  
> Rating: I'd say M but it kind of teeters on the edge of E

Bigfoot hunting in the woods had gone well, so why would hunting in the snow be any different

Ryan knows why. Because the world hates him and wants him dead. With the filming crew gone for the evening, he and Shane do one last loop around the cabin they have rented out, trudging through the snow in silence, worn out after a day of trekking and keeping their eyes open for any Foot activity. Shane wants to take the long way back but Ryan outright refuses. He’s tired, he wants to sit in front of the hard-to-light fireplace of the cabin and fall asleep and not think about snow and cold anymore. Shane calls him a delicate lily that’s too used to soaking up the California sun and Ryan flips him off and stomps down the short path. He faintly hears Shane shout after him to remind him to stay on the path but he ignores him. It’s not like Shane really cares anyway.

 

The last thought stings and he knows he’s being unfair. Shane does care about him. They’re friends, best friends even. But it’s so easy to get frustrated with the big guy, especially when he keeps up his jokes and nicknames and the way he needles Ryan about some things, unaware that he sometimes mentions stuff Ryan is insecure about.

“ _What if you ever fall for a Midwesterner_ ,” Ryan repeats Shane’s statement in a mocking voice, muttering it into the cold air. “ _They would never bring you home to meet the family during Christmastime in fear of you just dying out there_.” Ryan shoves his hands in his pockets and stomps onward. What if, indeed. His brain conjures up the sight of Shane earlier. Wrapped in a warm coat and a soft beanie, face a little flushed from the cold but eyes wide and bright as he trudges through the snow, stomps his feet in his boots to keep them warm- He looked like he was home. And Ryan knows it’s a great opportunity to make a Shane-is-Sasquatch joke but his mind has already interfered with:

_Shane wouldn’t take me home to meet his parents._

 

Which is dumb. They’re not together. Of course Shane won’t. Although he might if Ryan were to ask, because Shane is a sweetheart and if he heard that Ryan was going to spend Christmas alone, he would drag him along in a heartbeat. Somehow, the thought doesn’t lift Ryan’s mood.

He stops and picks up a rock to toss it at the small, frozen lake next to the path. It hits the ice with a low “tock” and then starts to skip across the ice, making a strange, chirping noise whenever it hits, until it skids to a halt. Ryan stares ahead. A tiny part of his monkey brain wants to go out and grab it but he is smarter than that. Just because the ice can hold a tiny rock didn’t mean that he wouldn’t break through and land in ice water. It’s not necessarily deep, but he shudders at the thought of the cold water lapping at him. Ryan turns to go back to the cabin. Maybe he can fall asleep before Shane comes back. That way he can’t put his foot in his mouth and accidentally insult him more.

 

Ryan is so lost in thought that he screams when suddenly, a small body breaks out of the underbrush next to him and crosses his path. He stumbles back, catches a glimpse of the shape of a small animal bouncing off – probably a rabbit – when his foot slips on the snow and he drops down the slope.

He barely manages to should before he hears a crack and ice cold water seeps into his jeans and jacket. Ryan gasps for air and tries to grab onto the slope in front of him, but the few dead plants that grow there are to weak and all he manages is ripping pieces off as he claws at _something_ for support. He slips lower, snow sliding up his shirt and he gasps for breath, yelping as he drops deeper into the river.

 

As it sometimes is, his brain instantly sends him a feeling of relief because he didn’t bring any equipment or a camera on the walk, so he didn’t just ruin a GoPro or something. But at the same time, ice cold water is now seeping into his _underwear_ and it starts to hurt, burn even. Ryan’s teeth are chattering as he tries again, tries to push himself out of the lake he is stuck in. His muscles tense and it’s fucking painful. Ryan grunts as he pushes himself forward, landing face first in the snow and shuddering. He thinks about calling for Shane, but he is out of breath from dragging himself up.

 _Am I going to die from Hypothermia…?_ He blinks as the thought goes through his pain addled mind. Part of him says no, his chest is still _relatively_ dry, except for the snow that is slowly seeping in, but at the same time he is shaking hard now and his legs feel like he just ran a marathon. Ryan gasps and army crawls further, trying to pull himself up the slope. He really wants to rest, but that would be the worst decision, so he keeps pushing forward. He is about half way up when he hears footsteps.

 

He takes in a gulp of air.

“Hello? Shane?”

Ryan shudders as he realizes his voice is shaking and way too quiet, but the footsteps do pause. He is about to suck in a deep breath to shout when the steps suddenly pick up again and then he sees snow and dirt rain down the slope next to him and Shane slides into view, stumbling as he tries to keep on his feet on the steep incline.

“Ryan! Ryan what happened?!”

Shane rolls him onto his back and Ryan winces as the back of his head lands in the snow and it soaks his hair. His beanie got lost somewhere… huh. He tries to push Shane off, Shane, who is touching him, holding his face and reaching for his neck with cold, naked fingers while babbling questions and Ryan doesn’t want him to fuss all over him because he still has _some_ pride left- but then Shane hauls him up and half drags Ryan on his back and shoulders. Ryan should push off of him, but Shane’s back is warm and even though he knows he is soaking the other guy’s coat, he clings to him while Shane struggles up the slope more or less on hands and feet while balancing Ryan on his back.  
  


Ryan doesn’t remember how Shane made it, but he pulls him to his feet once they’re back on the path and drags him along, clearly not caring that Ryan can barely move his legs. Ryan stumbles, but Shane grabs onto him and presses him against his body to steady his steps and Ryan flushes.

He is glad that Shane will think it’s just the cold.

-

The cabin door closes behind them and Ryan stands in the entryway, teeth not chattering anymore – which he guesses could be a bad sign – but his whole body is still shaking. He is so cold and so in pain, so all he wants to do is lie down. Before he can even lower himself however, Shane grabs him.  
  


“What happened, Ryan? God, I told you to stay on the fucking-”

“It w-wasn’t me. S-saw ssssssomething.” He sounds so stupid, but he can’t control his mouth and teeth and tongue like this. “M-maybe a rabbit. Stumbled and fe-fell.”

He is still shaking and Shane pulls off his soaked gloves and unzips Ryan’s jacket.

“Startled by a rabbit?! God, Ryan. Scared of your own shadow…”

Ryan whines. He wants to tell Shane to shut up but his head is pounding.

“Sorry.”

It’s so quiet that Ryan isn’t even sure he heard it. He stares at Shane.

“I’m sorry I made you walk back alone. We shouldn’t have split up. And I’m sorry I made fun of you. I… I didn’t want this to happen.”

Ryan is stunned. He really would like to tell Shane that it wasn’t his fault, but words are still tough. He has almost gathered enough courage to thank Shane for the rescue when his brain screeches to a halt. Shane has pushed his hands under his sweater and t-shirt and undershirt and starts to push all three upwards. Ryan yelps and grabs at Shane’s hands, trying to pull his clothes down again.

“Ryan.” Shane sounds tense. “You’re soaked to the bone! You can’t stay in those clothes or you will get hypothermia.”

Ryan shudders again. Shane’s hands have warmed up since they left the cold and they are still brushing his stomach, leaving his skin tingling. This is bad, very bad. But Shane has a point, so Ryan grits his teeth and lets him go. The clothes get pushed up and he brings up his arms to allow Shane to take them off. He can’t look the other man in the eye, so he looks to the side as Shane pulls the shirt and undershirt out of the sweater and throws all three over the back of a chair. Then he turns and opens Ryan’s pants and Ryan screws his eyes shut because he has already seen that coming.

“Ryan?”

He realizes he is holding his breath.

“Yeah?”

At least his voice was back.

“I’m really trying to help you here, I know it’s awkward but I just want you to put on something dry. Can you… maybe help me a little?”

Ryan looks down. Shane is half crouched in front of him with his hands on Ryan’s hips. Fuck it. If he didn’t die from embarrassment, he wouldn’t dare die from the cold.

“Okay.”

Shane seems to relax at that. He helps Ryan on a chair and then takes his shoes, socks and jeans off. He throws the soaked clothes aside and then runs to grab the blanket from the sofa. He wraps it around Ryan’s shoulders and it’s kind of scratchy but at least it’s warm. Ryan pulls it around himself and Shane starts to rub the rough fabric over his back and shoulders and arms, then his legs and Ryan feels pins and needles, not unlike when a limb falls asleep. He hisses and hears Shane murmur an apology.

“You gotta lose the underwear too, by the way. Don’t want that space to freeze.”

Ryan flushes and throws a look at Shane, but his friend is not looking at him. The tips of Shane’s ears are pink and Ryan wonders if it’s from the cold or the awkward situation. Shane gets up.

“I’ll grab you some fresh clothes, be right back.”

Ryan nods. Once Shane is out of sight he wiggles out of his boxers, keeping the blanket tightly wound around himself. He migrates to the sofa and sits down on it, feet tucked under himself as he rocks and shivers. He can feel how his body tries to heat him up again, but his wet clothes in the cold air have drawn a lot of body heat from him and he doesn’t really know if it’s working.

 

He nearly flinches when a stack of clothing is dropped next to him. Shane had come back without Ryan noticing.

“I got you your sweatpants and underwear, but I don't think you have another warm top so- uh.” Shane gestures to the soft red sweater on top of the pile.

Ryan stares. It’s one of Shane’s. It’s pretty much just a red sweater with thin black stripes but… it’s _Shane_ who it belongs to and it’s kind of large and Ryan feels terrible that the thought of wearing Shane’s clothes fills his stomach with warmth.

 

“Get yourself together, Ryan.” He thinks. “It doesn’t mean anything. He’s your friend and doesn’t want you to die.”

-

Shane moves to the kitchenette and Ryan ducks behind the sofa to get dressed with at least some modesty. Underwear, socks, sweatpants and… Shane’s sweater. It’s a bit too long for Ryan, of course and the sleeves cover his hands. He doesn’t push them up, because his hands are still fucking cold and the sweater is fluffy and warm. He buries himself in it, all the way up to his chin and it is mostly to warm up but also because he noticed Shane’s smell in the fabric. He swallows hard. This wasn’t good. Ryan wraps himself in the blanket and tries not to think about it too much.

-

 

-

Shane is still freaking out. He doesn’t show it to*Ryan, but he is very close to losing his shit.

When he returned to the cabin and found it locked he had instantly turned and rushed up the short path. He had a feeling that something bad had happened. Ryan wouldn’t just walk off into the winter woods, he’s smarter than that. When he had seen the disturbed snow and the shape of a body down below, he had nearly chocked with how hard his heart had jumped into his throat.

And now, he has a shaking Ryan wrapped in a blanket and _Shane’s sweater_ on the sofa and he tries to make tea with the old kettle on the counter. Shane grabbed the sweater as an afterthought, when he couldn’t find any of Ryan’s warm clothes, but he has made the mistake and looked over after Ryan put it on and… fuck him gently with a chainsaw Ryan looks so _cute_. His hands are pulled into the sleeves and he has put his glasses, that luckily survived the fall, back on and he looks soft but also miserable and Shane’s heart hurts. The click and whistle of the kettle rips him out of his thoughts and he quickly grabs the tea pot and two mugs and returns to Ryan.

“Here.” He fills one of the mugs, even though the tea probably hasn’t steeped enough yet. “Hold this, it’ll help your hands. Drink it when you can, it will warm you more.”

Ryan takes the mug, sweater still pulled over his palms and tries to hold it straight despite his shaking fingers. Shane swallows and quickly turns away to light the fireplace. For all the failure the two of them had with the thing earlier, he somehow manages to do everything right on the first try this time. The small lighter cubes burn bright and the paper around the wood that’s stacked in the place quickly catches the wood on fire and Shane shuts the small glass window, too stunned to feel proud in the moment. He looks over his shoulder at Ryan. His friend seems a little calmer. His lips, blue before are slowly regaining the healthy, reddish tone and his skin looks less icy and more the usual bronze. Shane stands up, grabs the towel he brought earlier when he got the clothes and steps behind Ryan to carefully towel his hair dry. He feels Ryan stiffen under his touch and Shane bites his bottom lip, feeling guilty. If he’s true to himself, he really isn’t trying to use the situation to touch Ryan more. But he can’t deny that he feels happy taking care of Ryan like this.

 

Of course, Ryan doesn’t like it if the way he freezes whenever Shane touches him is anything to go by. Shane doesn’t want to be creepy, but he has to make sure that Ryan will be okay, that Ryan won’t get sick or harmed because of the silly little fight they had earlier about Ryan being too weak for the cold.

Shane has already tried to apologize, but he feels like he should do it again, now that both their brains aren’t occupied with the fear of Ryan freezing. He allows Ryan to ruffle through his almost dry hair and puts the towel down, unsure how to proceed. Ryan turns a bit and looks up at him.  
  


“Thanks…” He whispers.

“Hey… Ryan. I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean-”

“I know.”

Ryan looks up at him and then shuffles on the sofa to make room for Shane. Shane sits down and instinctively reaches out to rub a palm over Ryan’s back.

“How are you feeling?”

Ryan looks into his mug.

“A little better. Thanks again for … well, rescuing me.”

Shane swallows.

“Of course.” He should make a joke, something about keeping Unsolved alive or not wanting to give up the only other huge kernelhead in the office. But he can’t get himself to. Ryan is looking at him, hair ruffled and face slowly reddening. Maybe he really is warming up.

“I feel… too hot now.” Ryan grunts and pushes at the blanket, but Shane is quick to hold it in place.

“Don’t. Your body is trying to heat you up. You’re still cold.” He reaches out and touches Ryan’s forehead. Ryan is indeed still a little cool.

Ryan scoffs and shoves the blanket off anyway and Shane sighs and leans in to wrap it around him again. Ryan struggles for a moment and then jerks to the side, dropping the - thankfully empty - mug to the carpeted floor. He is now half lying on Shane’s arm and Shane grunts and pulls Ryan back to wrap the blanket around him. When Ryan grabs his shoulder however, he pauses.

Ryan is half lying down now, blanket trapped under his body and he is holding onto Shane who is braced over him. He looks better, less dying, but also a lot more soft. Ryan blinks up at him from behind his glasses, wearing Shane’s oversized sweater and Shane swallows hard. He looks… beautiful and Shane really wishes he could just lean in and kiss him. But he can’t because that’s not what they are. Still, Ryan keeps staring at him, as if searching Shane’s face for something.  
  


Shane nearly jumps when a hand settles on the back of his neck. Ryan’s fingers are warm from where he clutched the mug and Shane glances down at the carpet quickly. No matter how weak the tea had been, Ryan drank it, which is good. He really hopes he has done what he can to help against the cold. The hand on his neck tugs and Shane leans down a little. He’s not sure what Ryan is doing and he is definitely getting nervous being so close, but he assumes Ryan wants to say something and his voice is still too unstable.

 

“You could help me... warm me up even more.”

Shane frowns. His nose is almost touching Ryan's, and despite his nose being pretty big, they are so very close by now. He searches Ryan’s face for an explanation, but only sees how Ryan pulls an arm to his chest, hand still adorably hidden in the long sleeves.

“Uh… I- I think I did what I could?” His throat feels dry.

Ryan blinks.

“I … You’re probably right. Maybe I’m being stupid. You wouldn’t take me to meet your parents anyway.”

Shane blinks, dumbfounded.

“I’m sorry, what?”

Ryan looks at him, face hardened and he seems almost… accusing?

“You said it yourself. No Midwesterner would take me to meet their family on Christmas. I’m too weak for the cold. Clearly that was proven right afterwards because I’m too dumb to walk a path without falling in a lake.”

Ryan drops his gaze and swallows and Shane realizes with horror how upset he looks. Before he can interrupt, Ryan continues:

“I just thought… maybe… because you took such good care of me... Well, I guess you were just being a great friend and I’m the creep hitting on you just because you gave me your sweater.”

He isn’t looking at Shane anymore. He has both his arms drawn to his chest defensively and stares to the side. “Just… forget it. It’s dumb.”

Shane swallows hard. His hands are still fisted in the blanket and slowly, he lets it go. Just as slowly, carefully he places his hands on Ryan’s hips. His fingertips slip under the sweater a little and they brush warm skin. He hears Ryan gasp. The man underneath him turns his head and glances up at Shane.

“What are you-”

“Fuck.” Shane hisses. “I’m sorry I made you feel like that. I didn’t- I didn’t even know what I was saying. Are you _sure_ you want this? Or are you having some sort of cabin fever? Or was it because you could have died out there? Or-”

Ryan grabs his shirt and pulls him down. Shane nearly falls on top of him and barely manages to catch himself before his body can crush Ryan. Ryan doesn’t seem to care, he wraps both arms around Shane’s neck and kisses him and Shane jolts when Ryan’s warm and soft lips meet his own.

Shane’s eyes slowly slide close and his hands slip under the sweater and up Ryan’s sides while Ryan groans encouragingly into his mouth before his tongue slips in to meet Shane’s and Shane gasps.

 

For a couple of minutes, they just make out and when Ryan’s hands find their way under Shane’s shirt, they explore each other’s skin with their fingers. Ryan doesn’t seem like he wants to stop kissing Shane and Shane is down to keep making out for the rest of the evening. However, Ryan has other needs, too. They are chest to chest now, legs entangled and Ryan presses his hips up and the line of his hard dick brushes Shane’s thigh. Well, if Ryan was able to get a boner, his body heat is probably doing pretty okay. Shane actually starts to sweat now, which might be because Ryan is making needy noises against his mouth. _Fuck_. They don’t have enough clean clothes for this kind of stuff and Shane disentangles himself for a moment, despite Ryan’s protests. The othe man grabs at and clings to him and Shane gasps in protest.

“Let me- _Fuck_. Ryan, hang on.”

He grabs the blanket and pulls it over Ryan’s middle. Then he ducks under it and wiggles in the little blanket tent till he can kiss the strip of Ryan’s exposed stomach above his waistline. He is rewarded with a groan.  
  


Shane hasn’t planned on this, but once Ryan had asked him to “warm him up even more", they subconciously shifted their destination to this moment. Before soon, he is bobbing his head under the blanket. He's making sure that Ryan’s exposed middle is covered by it while he sucks and licks and relishes in those delicious groans and moans from above his head. After a bit, he feels Ryan’s hands on the back of his covered head and he groans and pushes against it, while simultanously trying to get Ryan deeper in his throat. When Ryan comes, it’s with the whisper of Shane’s name and both hands shoved under the blanket to fist in his hair. Shane’s hands are on Ryan’s stomach, brushing against his sweater and before long, he feels the soft material of the sleeves around Ryan's hands pressed against his cheek. He waits for Ryan to stop twitching before he swallows and comes up from under the blanket. Ryan’s eyes are gleaming and his face is flushed, a clear improvement to the stiff, cold and blue face Shane had dragged in earlier. He is tugged into a kiss and while Ryan nips on his lips, Shane can hear him murmur things.

 

He catches “thank you” and “wonderful” and “stay here” and Shane tries to kiss back while also tucking Ryan back into his pants and making sure he is fully dressed again.

“What about you?” Ryan gasps against Shane’s cheek as Shane pulls him in his arms and throws the blanket over both them.

“Not tonight. Another time.” He kisses Ryan’s forehead, but Ryan leans away to look at him. He is smiling widely.

“What?” Shane frowns. “What is it?”

“Another time.” Ryan echoes and he smiles at Shane so widely that Shane feels like is stomach is doing a somersault.

“Ah. Right. Yes I would like to do that again if-”

“Oh hell yeah.”

Shane chuckles.

“Great.”

He pulls Ryan in his arms and is wrapped in the warmth of his sweater in return and he is sure he can’t ever wear it again. It’s Ryan’s now. A hand tangles in his hair and Ryan kisses him again.

 _Huh,_ Shane thinks. _Probably not the only thing in my life that is Ryan’s now._ He smiles as he kisses back, drags the blanket all the way up and over them and holds onto the other man, safe and warm once again.


	18. Serial Killer! Shane and Cop! Ryan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Serial killer Shane and cop Ryan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Serial Killers, Killer! Shane, Cop! Ryan, Death mention, Strangulation mention, Drug mention, Nonconsensual Drug Use / Drugging  
> Rating: There is no actual death happening in the story but a lot of the story talks about it so, I would say M
> 
> (Featuring an exchange from the Bobby Dunbar Postmortem.

His partner told him to take it slow. Sit, watch and wait until the man makes a mistake. Ryan understands. Sooner or later every serial killer gets cocky and makes a mistake that exposes them. This one is already a lot more confident than in the beginning. But Ryan can’t just sit around and do nothing. Every day they sit and wait, people are dying.

Originally, the killer had left behind a body once a month. Every 15th someone would stumble over a corpse. No connections between the victims as far as they could tell. Each of them was strangled and had a large amount of sleep drugs in their system. Their tongue was removed after death and they never found any of them. Ryan assumes the killer keeps them as souvenirs and it is disgusting to think about. Now, they find a new body each week and Ryan had enough.

He has a general idea where the killer is “hunting”. Based on where the people lived, were most likely murdered and where the bodies were dropped off, he has marked an area. With nothing else to go by, he decides to just patrol it and hope for the best.

-

It’s not easy. People don’t really frequent the streets as much as before and he sees many of them travel in pairs or groups. Fear has started to grab at the people of the city and Ryan hates it. Terrorists of all kinds are disgusting to him. He sips on his coffee mug and wonders what in the world he was thinking, coming here.

His eyes fall on two people crossing the street. Both are men. One is older, in his sixties maybe. The other man is much younger. He is tall, with a mop of shaggy brown hair on his head and he wears a worn jean jacket. Ryan follows him with his eyes because despite the lanky figure, the guy is kind of handsome. Then his gaze falls on the man’s companion and he frowns. The guy is moving sluggish, slow and he leans too heavily on the younger man, who apparently has no worries about it at all. He has grabbed the old man under the arm and drags him along. While Ryan is watching, they vanish in a side street.

Odd.

He gets up and leaves his coffee as he slowly follows the two of them. The side street is shorter than he imagined and he ducks behind a bin as he sees the tall guy drop the older man against the wall and seems unperturbed when the man slips down and sits heavily on the ground. The old guy is muttering something and Ryan strains his ears. It sounds like he is trying to figure out what is going on.

The younger man reaches inside his jacket and pulls out a slim cord and a knife and Ryan’s blood grows cold. This wasn’t possible. He hadn’t run into the _Silencer_ like that, just hanging out in the right neighborhood and spotting him because he looked kind of nice. This _had_ to be a coincidence.

“You can come out, by the way. I know you’ve been following us.” The tall man turns and glances at the bins Ryan is hiding behind. _Shit_. He can pretend like nothing is here and stay where he is. He shouldn’t expose himself to a murderer.

The tall man stands and waits for about half a minute, but then he shrugs. He unwinds the cord and bends down to loop it around the old man’s neck. Ryan grits his teeth together. _Enough. Enough deaths and missing people._

“Wait!”

He stands up and his hand reaches for his gun, hidden underneath his light jacket.

“LAPD, step away-”

“There you are.” The man looks up, still looping the cord and smiling softly. “You like to make an entrance huh?”

“I said step away from-”

“Yeah, sure, sure.” With a soft chuckle, the man steps back and holds up his hands. “No reason to flip. I won’t harm _you_.”

“I don’t care.” Ryan grits out. “I’m here to stop your actions. You killed seventeen people.” He pulls out his badge and handcuffs. “You’re hereby-”

The man sighs.

“But _I_ didn’t do that. They put the noose on themselves. I just prepared their bodies the way they deserved it.”

Ryan grimaces.

“Nice story, but I could see you putting the rope around his neck, I doubt they all strangled themselves.”

The Silencer smiles.

“Oh I wasn’t talking about that. I’m saying that the actions of these people have caused their deaths and they deserved what was coming to them.”

Ryan is carefully stepping closer, one hand on his weapon while he holds out the handcuffs with his other.

“You’re not the one to decide that. You’re just a killer.”

The man looks a little disappointed. He takes a step towards Ryan but stops when the cop pulls his gun.

“You don’t understand…” He seems a little irritated. “All of them, every single one were _liars_. They spread their stories to make their lives better and ruin the ones of others. They put the noose around themselves when they wound their stories and it ended up choking them when the lie was uncovered. In the end, I just took the instrument of their crimes. _Their tongue._ ”

Ryan shakes his head.

“Save it for the judge when you plead insanity.”

The Silencer huffs, clearly insulted.

“You’re very rude.”

“Oh I’m so sorry.” Ryan grits out sarcastically.

He is standing face to face with the man now. His hands are still not on his head and Ryan hasn’t trained the gun on him, but there is a tension between them nonetheless.

“You can have him.” The killer says and makes a wave towards the older man who has nearly passed out. “See it as a gift from an admirer. I would not have expected someone to find me that easily.”

Ryan wants to gloat, but he stays serious.

“It was just luck. I happened to notice you. And then him.”

He nods towards the man. The killer grins slightly.

“You noticed me, hm?”

Ryan shrugs.

“Hands behind your back, now.”

The man sighs, but complies. When Ryan moves in to place the handcuffs, however, there is a quick move from the guy’s sleeve and he feels a pinprick in the side of his hand. He jerks back, sees a tiny droplet of blood and brings up his gun, but the taller man is quicker. An arm closes around Ryan’s throat from behind and jerks his head back. The other hand twists his fingers till his gun clatters to the ground. His vision blurs as his muscles relax and his mind tries to fight against whatever the guy has injected into him.

“Such a pity.” The voice murmurs into his ear. “If we had met under different circumstances I would have asked you out.”

Ryan feels his struggles grow weak as he throws himself against the grip.

“You’re insane.” He slurs. “Most people are liars. I’m sure you’re are one.”

The killer chuckles against his ear.

“Yeah? What am I lying about?”

Ryan grins slightly.

“I don’t know, you’re good at it.”

For a moment, the other man doesn’t move. The pressure on his neck doesn’t let up, but it doesn’t get tighter either. Then-

Ryan is dropped and his legs are too weak to hold him up, so he crumples on the floor. He hears a sigh above him.

“I really liked this place. I guess I will have to leave it.”

Ryan sees out of the corner of his eyes that his gun gets picked up and the man pockets it. Then he crouches down and adjusts Ryan’s limp body a little until the ground doesn’t scrape his cheek quite as bad and his arm isn’t twisted underneath him. The killer digs in the cop's pockets and pulls out Ryan’s cellphone. He places it in front of Ryan’s face and unlocks the emergency call function before typing 911.

“I guess I could have liked _you_ as well. Maybe we’ll get in touch again, one day. Until then-”

He mock-salutes Ryan and gets up while his phone starts trying to establish connection to the police department.

“Stay honest. It suits you.”


	19. Pining! Shane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Could you do some pining Shane in his point of view please? (P.s love your work!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Pining, Pining! Shane, hurt/comfort, angst and fluff, Happy Ending, Getting Together  
> Rating: T for swearing.
> 
> Sara is Shane's BFF in this one.

Shane sits back in his chair and sighs, rubbing at his eyes. He has been editing Ruining History for over three hours now and his eyes are starting to feel like boiled eggs. Something about it drains him and Shane technically knows what it is, but he doesn’t like to think about it.

 

It’s Ryan.

 

He skips through the different camera shots and stops at a shot of Ryan laughing. His face is lit up with that brilliant smile and Shane remembers exactly when it was. He is editing the Alesia episode and Ryan is smiling at the camera because Shane put a sports reference in. Just for him. Ryan picked up on it and so did Sara. Sara who immediately “awww”-ed because she knows of Shane’s crush. Shane could smack himself with his own keyboard because it’s too obvious what he is doing. Instead, he looks up. Ryan is smiling right at the camera as he mentions how sweet Shane is being and Shane stares in those deep, brown eyes and allows himself to imagine that Ryan could look at him just like that. Surprised and happy and kind. Shane sighs. 

 

Part of him wants to reach out and touch the screen, dreaming about being able to touch Ryan’s face for real. But that would be a little too cliché, so he doesn’t. Instead, he saves his work and closes the program. He’s already too blunt sometimes. He remembers grabbing at Ryan when they were at Knott’s Berry Farm and holding onto his shoulder. He remembers every time Ryan gives him a hug, which sadly isn’t very often and how hard it is to let him go. Shane remembers that one night where they hung out at the Tiki Bar and had a couple of drinks, laughing about something he doesn’t remember.

 

Ryan had dropped against his shoulder because he couldn’t sit upright with how hard he was laughing and Shane had looked down, fully aware that his cheeks were flushed and Ryan had looked up at him and grinned. With the alcohol numbing his inhibitions, Shane had reached out and cupped Ryan’s chin to tilt up his face. He barely remembers Ryan’s reaction, except for those deep brown eyes widening. Shane had barely leaned in when somewhere across the bar, a tray of glasses had fallen and smashed on the ground and both of them had shot up from where they sat and checked in to see if anyone was hurt. Ryan never brought it up again and Shane is grateful. Sure, the memory makes him feel warm and excited, but the idea of scaring Ryan off and making him uncomfortable is too much to bear. He is glad that Ryan apparently decided to ignore it. Or maybe he had been too drunk and just forgotten about it.

 

Shane stares at his dark screen and sighs.

 

He has become so dependent on Ryan. The man is his best friend and Shane will always hit him up when there is something social going on. Shane is not the most outgoing or social person ever, he prefers outings with one or two friends. Going to the movies with Ryan means being close to him and indulging in the fantasy that somehow, they could be more. But he usually drags Sara along so there is someone to keep an eye on him and make sure he doesn’t mess up.

Sara always wanted him to tell Ryan the truth and Shane agrees. Ryan deserves the truth. But Shane is just so damn afraid.

 

One night he is lying in bed, listening to the radio and “Please Don’t Leave Me” by P!nk comes on and without any warning, he starts crying. He has no idea why the hell the song even has an impact on him, but he guesses it’s the title alone that scares the fuck out of him. Shane grabs a pillow and pulls it close, crying into it like he is a teenager with a crush and he just begs and hopes and prays to whoever or whatever is listening, that one day Ryan might entertain the idea of loving him back.

 

A bunch of their friends are getting married and announce that they are going to have kids and Shane would be a bad best friend if he didn’t notice Ryan’s soft, sad expressions whenever something like that was announced. Ryan was everyone’s biggest supporter, the type to give you a way-too-expensive wedding gift or the one who is the first to notice that someone is pregnant.

Shane knows why. Above all, Ryan wants a family and Shane hopes dearly that he will have that some day. Despite his infatuation, he wants Ryan to be happy _his_ way. So instead of focusing on his crush, he sometimes dreams about Ryan finding “the one”, a beautiful and kind woman that matches his personality and makes him happy. Someone to raise kids with, someone to grow old with. Shane’s heart breaks at the thought but at least the image of Ryan hugging his kids and smiling soothes the pain. Maybe, one day, after everything has died down a little, Shane would be able to tell him.

-

Life never goes the way he planned.

 

They are out one night. Sara is nursing a cold so she told them she wouldn’t be able to come last minute and there is nobody to keep Shane in line when they’re watching a movie. He is gripping the armrests of his seat tightly, as if they are watching a horror movie, because he doesn’t trust himself that he won’t reach out to Ryan and breach a barrier he’s not allowed to break down.

At one point, Ryan puts his arm on the space between them and his hand lands on Shane’s and Shane gasps and pulls back.

“Sorry.” He whispers. “Didn’t mean to hog it all.”

In the flickering of the film projector he can see Ryan’s white teeth and his friend is grinning.

“No worries, man. It’s all good.”

Shane swallows. If Ryan only knew. Thing were not good at all.

 

It’s Ryan’s idea to go for karaoke afterwards and Shane loves karaoke, but he is also terrified.

They have a lot of fun drinking and singing songs. It always takes them a bit to get buzzed enough to feel comfortable to sing, but at some point they usually get too drunk to keep singing.

 

A girl stumbles on the stage and the familiar “dadadada dadadada” comes on and Shane swallows. She doesn’t quite have P!nk’s lungs, but she doesn’t sound bad. Ryan next to him moves his head slightly in the beat, but when the singer croons “Please, don’t leave me…” Shane feels tears well up behind his eyes. He drops his head and chokes on a sob and when Ryan puts a hand on his shoulder, he breaks down into sobs.

 

He doesn’t remember much of the night, there are only quick and short impressions. Ryan’s worried face, the seat of an Uber car, his front door, his bed.

Shane wakes up to a series of text messages from Ryan explaining that he had made sure Shane got home safe and that he hopes he’s fine and a reminder that they are best friends and that Shane can come to him with anything.

Shane swallows hard and types a single message back.

 

“I can’t tell you this one. You would hate me.”

 

The message is read almost immediately afterwards, but he doesn’t get a response. There is not even a notification that Ryan is typing, so Shane drops his phone in his bed and forces himself out of his bedroom to take a shower. He stands in the middle of his kitchen, chewing on cereal and contemplating his life when the doorbell rings.

 

It’s Ryan.

 

Shane’s heart beats hard enough to make him feel nauseous as he counts the seconds Ryan will need to call the elevator and ride it up. There is a knock on his door and Shane takes a deep breath before he opens it.

Ryan looks amazing for someone who had been out drinking until three in the morning. He seizes Shane up and looks at him like he isn’t sure what to say.

 

“Can I come in?” He finally says.

Shane steps to the side and lets him.

 

They sit on Shane’s couch, each of them nursing a coffee. Finally, Ryan is talking.

“Listen… Shane. I know I’m not good at relationships myself, but if you need any advice or support… or even an open ear… You know I’m here for you, right?”

Shane closes his eyes. He doesn't have to ask how Ryan guessed the issue, he probably babbled about it last night. Now he wants to laugh and cry at the same time, but more than everything he wants to hug Ryan.

“I know.”

“And… I mean, you’re entitled to your opinion but I have to say it kinda hurt to hear that you think I would hate you for you being in love with someone. I mean, hey, even if I didn’t like them, if they make you happy? That’s a great reason for me to support you.”

Shane presses a hand to his mouth and tries to keep his breathing even.

“Shane. You can tell me anything. I really mean it.”

Shane takes a deep breath and steels himself.

“I was afraid for multiple reasons…. It’s not because of you, not just. In general. You see…”

He sighs and places his mug on the table, leaning back to stare at his empty hands.

“It’s a guy.”

He glances up and sees Ryan’s eyes transfixed on him as he puts his cup away as well.

“Okay? Is that… Shane, I would never judge you for that. I really- I mean it sounds stupid saying that but I have no problem with people who aren’t straight.”

“I know.” Shane sighs. “The thing is, you know him, very well.”

“Okay?” Shane can see that Ryan is mentally going through a list of their male friends. “So, why is it a problem? Is he married?”

Shane swallows. “No.”

“In any sort of relationship?”

Shane shakes his head.

“So… are you afraid that he’s straight?”

Shane thinks for a moment.

“That’s not it… He wants a family. He wants children. Even if he were to… indulge me… I’m scared of taking that life away from him.”

Shane expects Ryan to nod in understanding, instead his friend scoffs.

“That doesn’t have to mean anything! There are many ways to have children and a family when you’re a same sex couple or when you can’t have your own kids.” He glances over at Shane. “Don’t let that… you never know! If he makes you happy, you probably make him happy too! I know you make me happy.”

He smiles up at Shane and Shane feels his breath stop.

“You don’t mean that.” He says, trying to fight the pain in his throat. “You mean it differently…”

 

Ryan blinks. Then he blinks again. Then, his eyes widen.

“Oh… _Shane_ …”

“Please.” Shane wrenches his eyes shut. “I’m sorry. I… I won’t make you uncomfortable, I promise, I just want to be your friend, okay? Please don’t-”

He can’t say it, but in his head he is shouting _Please, please don’t leave me. Please, Ryan, any way you want me to be your friend, I will be that-_

 

Ryan cups Shane’s face in his hands and smiles up at him.

“Is that it? Is that what was on your mind the last couple of weeks… months?”

Shane wrenches his eyes shut and nods.

“Oh Shane…”

“I’m sorry…”

“No, Shane. I’m sorry. You’ve gone through so much pain… do you… do you hate me now?”

Shane laughs. It’s dry and painful. He finally opens his eyes to look at Ryan.

“I could never hate you. I was so afraid you would leave.”

“Shane…”

Ryan shakes his head and then he pulls his legs up on the couch and pushes up on his knees. His hands still cradle Shane’s face and then he pulls the stunned man into a soft kiss.

 

When Ryan pulls back, he seems a little pained himself.

“Why didn’t you tell me? I saw you back off and I thought you didn’t want this… I thought…”

Ryan shakes his head and Shane can only stare at him, stunned.

“Oh.” He finally says. “You’re not leaving?”

Ryan chuckles and kisses his cheek.

“I’m not going anywhere.”

Shane slowly brings his arms up to wrap them around Ryan’s form. He’s solid and real and not a dream.

-

They go on their first date the following evening. Shane can hold Ryan’s hand while they are watching the movie and when Ryan drops him off at his apartment, Ryan pulls Shane down and gives him a soft kiss on the mouth.

 

Shane melts into Ryan and when he falls asleep later, he dreams of hanging with Ryan in their flat and he can take his hand without problem and there is the vague memory of planning a family and everything is okay.


	20. Hogwarts AU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> fic prompt: magic shenanigans. do with that what you will. could be a crack-ish fic, if you so please!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Hogwarts AU, Same Age AU, Ravenclaw! Shane, Hufflepuff! Ryan, Fluff, Feelings Confessions  
> Rating: T for swears

Ryan stares at the page of his potions book and tries to recall if he had already added the worms wart or not. A double dose would probably destroy his cauldron and he just bought a new one.

He sheepishly glances at his classmates. Potions classes weren’t too terrible for Hufflepuffs, because thanks to Professor Sprout, they knew at least half the ingredients they work with. Still, it doesn’t help that his mind is somewhere else. He’s thinking about the upcoming Quidditch game and about the Christmas party and … well. Ryan looks up.

 

The boy next to him is frowning at his cauldron which has started to spit out orange and green bubbles. Ryan suppresses a snort. Shane has been his best friend since they met in first year in the Hogwarts Express and started chatting excitedly about what was waiting ahead. Ryan had described himself “half-and-half”, meaning one of his parents was a muggle and Shane had cheerily stated that the only other magical person in his family is his grandmother who had basically thanked all heavens because Shane’s siblings were muggles and she had thought she would never have a grandchild that went to Hogwarts.

Even though they ended up in different houses, they spent a lot of time with one another. After the second wizard war, the houses had sort of… melded together a bit. There was still some good natured rivalry between them, but the hostility had faded under the terror of what these splits could cause. Shane loved to hang out in the Hufflepuff common room, mostly because he hated to take the stars all the way up to the Ravenclaw tower. But one evening, when he had been half asleep, he had whispered that the main reason why he liked to hang out there was, that it felt very much like Ryan’s home. And he loved to spend time with Ryan.

 

The Hufflepuff boy had tried not to think too much about it. Year six was tough, there was a lot to learn, a lot to prepare for and a lot of new subjects. He really tried to focus. And yet…

 

“Shane?”

Shane looks up from his cauldron. He has poured the Unicorn milk in there and the potion is a bit too thick compared to the goal, but at least the bubbles have stopped.

“Do you remember if I put the worms wart in this?”

“Uh. I didn’t pay attention.”

“Shit, neither did I.”

Shane chuckles. Then, he pauses and his face lights up. Ryan can basically see an idea pop into his head.

“What?”

Shane winks at him – which always makes Ryan kind of fluttery – and take his hand. Ryan is about to protest when Shane brings up his fingers and sniffs them. It’s so weird that Ryan is just… standing there, kind of frozen as he stares at Shane.

“You did.”

“Wh- how?”

“Worms wart stinks to high heaven. I never get that off of my fingers.”

“Oh.”

Ryan stares at his hand after Shane let it go.

“Thank you.”

“No problem.”

Shane grins and drops the elderberry in, mutters something – Ryan realizes it’s not a spell, it’s just Shane saying “Please for the love of Peeve’s stupid hat let this work.” - and spits in the brew.

The smell of mint spreads around them and Shane punches both hands to the ceiling in silent celebration. Ryan golf-claps, trying to hold his bright smile back.

-

“Hey Ryan?” Shane asks one evening over a match of wizard chess.

“Hm?” Ryan nudges his pawn to smash Shane’s knight into pieces. Shane isn’t paying attention, clearly.

“Do you want to go to Hogsmeade with me this weekend?”

Ryan glances up.

“Sure? What did you have in mind?”

Shane smiles.

“It’s a surprise.”

-

Hogsmeade is cold and snowed in but beautiful. Ryan is laughing as Shane shoves a long, way-too-colorful hat over his ears and lets the pompom on top bounce. He looks ridiculous and Ryan’s face feels oddly warm.

 

They grab a butterbeer each and wander around the village afterwards. Somewhere between the center and the outskirts, Shane has snuck his his hand into Ryan’s and Ryan has pointedly ignored any chance to comment on it.

Shane hasn’t yet let up what the surprise is and Ryan is getting a little nervous. But Shane is humming a Christmas song and holding his hand, so he feels like he can “endure” the situation a little longer.

 

Finally, on top of a small hill, Shane stops.

 

Ryan looks around. All he can spot is a field. Far away, almost near the horizon he can see the outlines of the Shrieking Shack. He exhales as Shane pulls his hand away, willing himself not to be too disappointed. His breath billows out in a cloud in front of his mouth and Ryan can’t look over at Shane, because he’s afraid of what is coming.

 

Maybe Shane has figured out what Ryan is feeling and wants to let him down gently. Maybe he wants to tell Ryan that they can’t hang out over Christmas. With Ryan’s parents working in the USA, Ryan usually spends Christmas at Hogwarts. Shane alternates between spending it at home and at Hogwarts. When Ryan had asked why, Shane had shrugged and said he wanted to spend it with his friends sometimes. He hasn’t gone home last year. Maybe he is going to tell Ryan that he will go home this year, instead.

 

“Ryan? You in there?”

Ryan blinks and looks over at Shane. His face is a little too close and he can see the slight freckles around Shane’s nose. His Ravenclaw scarf almost hides his mouth completely, but Ryan just sort of knows that he’s smiling.

“Yeah, sorry. I was thinking of the holidays.”

“It’s gonna be fun! I asked for a new wizard’s chess! We can play all through till New Years.”

Ryan laughs.

“All that practice still won’t get you to beat me.”

Shane sticks out his tongue, but he’s grinning.

 

“So I still got that surprise.”

“Okay.” Ryan takes a deep breath, preparing. “What is it?”

Shane winks at him and pulls his wand from his sleeve.

Ryan frowns at Shane widens his stance and points the wand at the open field. His eyes stay on Ryan for some reason and Ryan feels a little nervous.

“Shane…?”

Shane licks his lips for a moment and then grins at Ryan widely.

 

_“Expecto Patronum!”_

 

He thrusts his wand forward and despite the bright sunlight and the snow, Ryan can see the silver _thing_ burst out of the tip of the wand and rush out into the field. It’s a small creature and Ryan catches the sight of four legs and floppy ears before it bounds off. He’s staring, open mouthed.

 

“You- You did it!”

His voice jumps a bit as he turns to Shane with wide eyes and his arms thrown wide.

“You cracked it! You created a patronus!”

Shane is grinning widely. His cheeks are dusted pink and he turns to Ryan and before Ryan knows what’s happening, he is wrapped in a hug. Oh well. He won’t complain.

He squeezes Shane back and they pull away again. Shane looks a little sheepish.

“I wanted to show you first because… well… You kind of, helped me.”

“Helped you?”

Shane looks out on the field. His patronus finished the dash across the field and is running back. Ryan glances at it…

 

And nearly falls over.

 

A small, excited dachshund is bounding towards them. He is silver and see-through, but there are still the hints of marks on its back and head. Ryan is looking at the patronus-version of his family dog, Micki.

 

“What the-”

The dog stops in front of him, jumps once, twice against his leg and Ryan feels the barest brush of air when it does. The dog yips and it sounds faint and echo-y and then it disperses.

Ryan looks up.

Shane’s eyes are trained on his face and his best friend looks apprehensive and… almost scared.

“Shane…” Ryan starts carefully. “Why… Why is Micki your patronus?”

Shane swallows visibly.

“Because…” He starts carefully. “Because thinking of you is my happiest possible thought.”

“Oh.” Ryan says, understanding.

 

He can see Shane’s shoulders droop as his friend lowers his gaze to the ground.

“Yeah. So… I guess, I wanted you to know.”

Ryan feels his heart beat fast as he steps closer. He cups Shane’s face in his hands and tilts it up a little so he can look up into it. Shane is so stupidly tall, but right now, he doesn’t care.

“Thank you.” He says, because he doesn’t know what else to say and then he kisses Shane.

 

They stand together for a while, fresh snow falling around them. Ryan holds Shane’s hand, their fingers entangled and the other hand on the back of Shane’s neck. His stomach feels like a whole collection of Weasley Fireworks is going off inside and his feet are getting cold and Ryan feels better than he has all year.

_Fuck_. Now he has to practice his patronus. Shane clearly won’t let up till Micki has Dori to run around with. Oh well.

 

There are worse goals.


	21. Ryan had/has food and body issues

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Ryan mentioning body/food issues briefly in a video and having an emotional conversation with Shane after

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Body Issues, "Eating your Feelings", Food Issues, Eating Disorders, Hurt/Comfort  
> Rating: T
> 
> (This one was actually tough! Because I do have dysphoria and dysmorphia but I never had food issues myself. I hope I did it justice.)

“Couldn’t they just… I don’t know, give them some pudding and tell them to leave?”

Ryan wheezes and half drops on the table.

“Wh-what?”

“Yeah, you know, give them a pudding cup and be like-”

“Th-thanks for staying here’s some pudding now shove off?”

“Yeah!”

Shane is smiling brightly and grins over at Ryan who is just shaking his head.

“I really don’t think… How the fuck does your brain work? That’s not how you get people to leave a _crime scene_ after they decided to have _sit-in_ because nobody tries to solve a murder- I-”

Ryan is wheezing again and Shane is giggling next to him.

“I would leave for a pudding cup!” Shane shrugs at the camera.

“Well I wouldn’t.”

“Really?!” Shane looks at him in disbelief. “It’s pudding!”

Ryan just shrugs.  
“I haven’t had pudding since I was fifteen.”

Shane’s jaw drops and he glances between Ryan and the camera, stunned. He stares at his co-host and sees the grin slip a little. Shane is about to ask when Ryan leans in and mutters quietly:

“I’ll tell you later, not now.”

Shane only nods and pushes the question down. Ryan gives him a grateful smile before he flips the page in his case file and continues to read the events of the case they are going through.

-

Shane expects Ryan to get back to the issue after the shoot, but he doesn’t so Shane doesn’t pry. The rest of the day is the same and Shane is starting to worry that he has breached a topic he’s not permitted to. He’s starting to think about a way to apologize to his friend and finds it hard to focus on work for the rest of the day. Ryan saves his ass from falling over himself trying to find a way to hang out with him to maybe apologize – by inviting him over himself.

 

“You wanna come hang at my place and watch something and make some popcorn?”

Shane swallows. He tries to read Ryan’s face if he is supposed to broach the subject or not, but Ryan seems relaxed and the question had come out very by-the-by. So Shane assumes they’ll just drop it and pretend it didn’t happen. He can deal with that.

 

“Sure. I still haven’t watched season two of One Day at a Time.”

Ryan gapes at him.

“You do know I consider that a personal attack, Sir.”

Shane laughs and holds his hands up in defense.

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry. We’ll fix that, then.”

-

They grab some take-out on the way and end up on Ryan’s couch, feet propped on the table with the Styrofoam containers strewn about them and the popcorn machine chugging away in the distance. The theme in the credits of episode one is barely over when Ryan suddenly reaches for the remote and pauses the show.

Shane has relaxed so far that he doesn’t even think about it much. He’s expecting Ryan to go and grab the popcorn or maybe use the bathroom. He almost drops his food when Ryan starts to speak.

 

“When I was a kid… I used to get sore throats all the time. Like, really bad inflammation.”

He leans back a little as he looks at Shane and starts touching his neck, pressing his fingertips to the sides.

“All of this would swell up. It was tonsillitis once or twice and I had my tonsils removed when I was eleven.”

Shane swallows and puts his food away. He sits up a little and twists, so he’s half facing Ryan.

Ryan blinks at him and then looks down at the table.

“You know how they give you a bunch of ice cream afterwards? Because you really can’t eat anything. It only got a little better afterwards, ever so often I would get pain and swelling again. I really didn’t like soup so what I ended up eating was mostly ice cream and pudding. Anything that was kind of liquid. But because I was in pain I also wanted to eat nothing but sweet stuff, because it made me feel better.”

His face darkens and Shane shifts in his seat, unsure if he should reach out and touch his shoulder or stay where he is.

“Ryan…” He finally starts. “You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to.”

“No, no it’s fine.” Ryan sighs. “I just don’t know how to explain it. I kept eating the stuff even when I wasn’t sick because… I don’t know, it made me feel better about anything I had. It was unhealthy, I knew that, but I would just gorge myself on freakin’ pudding cups like a cartoon character.”

He huffs his breath through his nose.

“It got so bad that I would buy them in bulk, sometimes the little Asian style ones that are more like jello, you know.” He forms a circle with thumb and forefinger to indicate the little cups.

“I would stash them under my bed and keep the trash in an extra bag, because I knew my parents would tell me it’s not good to keep eating it. But eventually, it just became my coping mechanism. When I struggled in school, when I got in a fight with a friend, when I had to deal with some shitty racist kid in the basketball court… Whatever it was, shoveling the stuff in my face made me feel better. Or, well, it gave me the illusion I felt better because, of course, I gained weight and I got acne from all the sugar-”

He rubs his soft, brown skin and Shane feels something tug at his heart. He really wants to reach out and- He doesn’t even know, he wants to comfort Ryan but isn’t sure how to, so he stays quiet.

“So I felt even worse which meant I ate _more_.” He sighs.

“Eventually my brother caught me. He didn’t tell my parents but he sat me down and told me I was clearly dealing with some shit that needed to be addressed. And I just… kind of broke down? Everything I had tried to push away and not deal with and bury under the feeling of just eating and not dealing with feelings kind of… broke out. I’m not a quiet crier so, of course, my parents noticed.”

Ryan smiles sadly and Shane feels his eyes moisten as he sees the broken expression.

“Ryan-” He starts, but Ryan is already continuing.

“It got better after that. Wasn’t easy, of course, but I learned to cope differently. Talk about things that bothered me, got in touch with… my feelings, I guess. But I kind of shied away from pudding desserts and that stuff afterwards. Even ice cream is iffy sometimes.”

He makes a face and looks around.

“And you know, I’m still not eating healthy. I’m still shoving way too much fast food in my face on Friday evenings and, you know, despite all the jokes about me running around shirtless too much, I still don’t like to look at myself in the mirror on Friday night because I look stuffed and weirdly puffy and… gross, I don’t know. I picked up regular training and do what I can to keep the skinny fat to a minimum but when I don’t pay attention, I get self conscious and disgusted with myself. And then in a reaction to that, I try to bottle up my feelings which in return gets me to _eat_ my feelings again and I really try to avoid that.”

He smiles a bit.

“I guess… the show helps in a way. And TestFriends helped. And social media, too. When I keep having a camera on me, I can have an eye on my body and the fear of ruining it completely kind of keeps me in line.”

Shane winces. He feels miserable, because he doesn’t know how to help.

“I… Ryan first of all: I’m sorry I brought it up.”

Ryan waves him off.

“It’s fine, you didn’t know. It didn’t… I don’t know, trigger any bad memories or anything. I just didn’t want to talk about it at work.”

Shane shifts in his seat again.

“I know. Thank you for telling me, anyway.” He looks at Ryan and smiles hesitantly. It’s mirrored by Ryan. “I guess, I don’t really know… how to help you with it. But if you ever want to talk about something, anything that bothers you… I’m here, okay? You can tell me anything and I promise I’ll be serious and not make any stupid jokes, okay?”

Ryan nods.

“Okay. Thank you.”

“Of course.”

Shane leans closer and opens his arms hesitantly and he feels a rush of relief when Ryan closes the distance and hugs him. Shane rubs Ryan’s back. The position they are in is a little awkward, but he doesn’t care. He feels still helpless, but a little less terrible than before.

When they part, he catches Ryan rub his eyes for a moment, but he doesn’t mention it.

 

“For the record, I always think you look pretty hot. And I know that probably doesn’t help with your own image but… I know many people think that.”

Ryan laughs and shakes his head.

“Shut up, Shane.”

“No, really! There is a whole … what do they call it… “thirst tag” about you on social media. They call it Berg-arm-ra, because of these.”

He pats Ryan’s bicep and Ryan throws his head back and laughs. Shane grins, happy that he can at least do this for Ryan. If all he can do to help is occasionally make him burst into a full bodied laugh, then that’s what he will do.

-

It’s not until a couple of months later, when Ryan kisses him for the first time in the safety of Shane’s kitchen, that he realizes they have a bigger impact on each other than just jokes and movie nights. And even though he knows, he can’t fix Ryan’s problems or take the issues off of his back, as much as he wants to, he makes a point of peppering kisses all over that beautiful face and body whenever he gets the chance to. Ryan might not always think of himself as beautiful or handsome, but Shane promises to remind him whenever Ryan needs him to.


	22. Clairvoyant! Shane & Clairvoyant! Ryan - Both kept it from the other

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How about: Both Shane and Ryan were born with the ability to see and hear ghosts, but they both went in different directions with it. Ryan wanted to prove that ghosts existed, and Shane wanted to deny that they do because he wanted to pretend to be someone more brave and cavalier than he actually is (he just thinks its nice to be able to act like he isn't afraid of the shadows that flicker over his mirror, under his bed, that follow him in alleys. It's fun to pretend to be someone he isnt) and then one day the secret gets spilled for both of them and they have a heart to heart?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Clairvoyant! Shane, Clairvoyant! Ryan, Ghosts  
> Rating: T

“Come out, ghosts! The ghouligans are here!”

Shane shouts at the darkness, as usual and Ryan next to him cowers a little. He hates this part. Shane doesn’t know, doesn’t see it of course, but almost always when he does his little show, the flickers and shadows intensify. Ghosts are rarely full body apparitions, at least to Ryan they are not. But he sees movement out of the corner of his eyes, catches something slipping through a wall or a shadow choking the naked light bulb above their heads until the thing starts to flicker. Ghosts are not something you can look in the eyes. They are more how an optical illusion happens. When you relax your eyes and unfocus, you spot it. Ryan grits his teeth as he feels the energies around them surge up.

“Come on! Hit me! Throw me around! Show me that you’re real!”

Shane is wandering off, the cone of his flashlight bobbing and Ryan sucks in a breath through his teeth and follows him. He is equally afraid of and looking forward to the day Shane actually causes comething to attack him. Of course, he doesn’t want his best friend get hurt, not _injured_ at least. But if Shane actually witnessed something happening, something truly _compelling_ as he would say, maybe he would finally believe Ryan.

Then again, Ryan never told him that he can see ghosts. He only said that he believes in them, believes in the energy that is released when a human body dies. If he is honest, he doesn’t think that Shane would call him insane for claiming to see ghosts. Shane has said multiple times that he believes Ryan when he says he has experienced ghostly activity. He, of course, makes it sound like “I believe that you _think_ you saw a ghost.”, but he doesn’t make Ryan feel like he thinks he’s nuts. Still, Ryan knows it sounds nuts to say “I see the shadows draw closer when you taunt them.” or  “I saw a hand reach for yours when you took Mr. Borden’s money in the Lizzie Borden house.”

Shane is standing in the middle of the kitchen. Ryan feels more than he sees the flicker of the house’s matriarch near the stove. The stove where she had poisoned herself with carbon monoxide. Shane stares right at the stove and Ryan shudders because Shane is staring the woman in the face without really seeing her. She is relatively corporeal. He image flickers and breaks, here and there, like a half-rotten photograph, but Ryan can see her expression. She seems displeased with Shane and Ryan swallows, ready to distract or drag Shane to another room or bring out the spirit box to get him to stop taunting. But Shane and the woman just square off and Ryan could swear he sees Shane’s lips move for a moment. The woman stiffens and then flickers out of view. Ryan exhales.

“You alright?” Shane asks, offhandedly.

“I think so, yeah. This place is just… it gives me the creeps.”

“I just think it smells funny.” Shane smirks over at him and Ryan huffs.

-

They return upstairs. The lights here aren’t flickering, but Ryan feels the energy pick up anyway, there is a prickle in the back of his neck and Shane is just wandering about as if nothing is happening.

Ryan clears his throat.

“So, uh. If the son of the family is here… is it true that you killed your sister?”

“Jesus, Ryan.” Shane giggles. “Straight for the jugular, huh?”

“Well-” Ryan shifts uncomfortably. “I don’t think being friendly will get this one to talk.”

He fidges with the spirit box and ignores Shane’s sigh of annoyance at the sight. Ryan is about to turn the device on when there is a flicker right before him and he gasps, taking half a step back when he sees the impression of a raised fist holding a crowbar and the impression of a cruel face.

 _Don’t be afraid._ It loops in his brain. _They can’t physically harm you, he’s just trying to fuck with you and scare you off. Don’t be afraid._

“Get the fuck away from him!” Shane hisses and the man’s ghostly visage flickers, looks at Shane and then he’s gone.

Ryan freezes. Shane is staring at him.

“It.” Shane says, voice quiet. “I meant… leave it. The thing.” He gestures towards the spirit box. “I mean… I have a serious head ache, can we not, today? Please?”

Ryan blinks and stares. Shane is starting to shrink under the gaze.

“Okay, fine, fine. Do your thing, Ryan.”

The spirit box feels slippery in his fingers as Ryan’s palms start to sweat. This isn’t possible. He has to be misinterpreting things. Shane didn’t see- Shane can’t see-

Suddenly, a surge of anger shoots through him.

“You can see them?! All this- _fucking time_ you could see them?!”

Shane takes a step back and lowers his flashlight. His face drops into darkness but Ryan is not going to let him off the hook that easily. He brings up his own light and shines it straight into Shane’s face. The taller man winces and brings up an arm to shield his eyes but Ryan isn’t going to joke about “It will give you the vision” this time. He feels much more like an old fashioned detective, shining a light in the eyes of the person he is questioning.

“Shane, I swear to god, you better answer me-”

“Fine!” Shane hisses and he steps forward and crowds in Ryan’s personal space and Ryan nearly drops his flashlight.

“But I’m not doing this shit in front of cameras. And we’re gonna cut this out, understood?”

Ryan doesn’t like the tone Shane is using, so he simply grits his teeth and pushes his chin forward in defiance.

“We’ll see about that! Depends on what you have to say for yourself.”

Shane huffs and Ryan sees him turn off his cameras. Before Ryan can ask anything, Shane is stomping out of the room. A moment later, Ryan hears him decend the stairs. 

“What the actual fuck.” He whispers to himself as he turns his own equipment off and follows him.

-

Shane waits outside. He has dropped the cameras on the front porch and stands there, arms crossed with his back leaning against the railing. He looks at Ryan expectantly and Ryan rolls his eyes and places his equipment next to Shane’s. He walks over to face his friend, crosses his arms as well and leans against the house wall. 

For a couple of moments, they just stare at each other.

“I used to have terrible nightmares as a kid.” Shane begins. “When I was about eight, I started to notice that the shadows in my room would move in a way shadows aren’t meant to move.”

Ryan swallows. He remembers the first time he noticed something and dismissed it. He had been older, a teenager and he had thought it might be something to do with his eye sight. He had gotten glasses shortly afterwards. It wasn’t until the incident on the Queen Mary, where he had seen a hand swipe through the wall in front of him, catch just the corner of the little plastic bag and tossed the tube of toothpaste off the shelf. He doesn’t interrupt Shane with any of this, however, so Shane goes on.

“It scared the fuck out of me. I had my own room, which sounds nice until you don’t have your brother to shake awake and ask if he sees what you’re seeing. I tried anyway. And he saw nothing. I tried to hint at it with my parents and they said it was my imagination. So… I tested it.”

Ryan frowns. 

“How?”

“I confronted it. I saw something reach out from under my bed, so I jumped on it with both feet.”

Ryan sucks in a worried breath at that.

“I told it to fuck off. And it did.” Shane smirks a little at that. “After that, it became my habit. Whenever I saw something, I would taunt it. I would ask it to stop messing about and actually fuck with me. It’s how I learned that nearly all of them are too weak to even push something around.”

He shrugs, looking at the floor.

“A couple did try to throw stuff at me, but whenever I kept laughing at them or cussing them out, they would eventually fade. One tried to harm me. Once.”

Ryan bites his bottom lip.

“What happened?”

Shane smirks. He uncrosses his arms and pulls up his shirt a little, turning. Right underneath his ribs, Ryan can spot a small, white scar in the light of the flashlight.

“Tried to grab at me. It was a super thin gash, but deep, almost like a paper cut. I screamed and my mom came in and it vanished. I never saw it again, but even after that…”

He shrugs and drops his shirt again.

“It… feels better to stare them down. If I go full “Do you feel lucky, punk?” on them, they usually try to retreat. Ghosts are a cowardly bunch, most of the time and… uh…”

Ryan catches how the tips of Shane’s ears go pink as the other man looks up at the flickering porch light, throat bobbing as he swallows.

“It also feels better to pretend to be brave. I’m not fearless, despite all the stuff we joke about and the fans say. I’m actually pretty cowardly. But if they catch onto that, they will only feed off of it. The best way to get them to fuck off is to pretend you’re this strong, fearless person that can crush ghosts under their heel. So… that’s what I’m doing.”

He finally looks at Ryan again.

“I didn’t mean to lie to you. When I say I don’t believe in ghosts, I mean it… sort of. I don’t put my thoughts and beliefs into them, because that only feeds into their… energy or whatever you want to call it. But when I deny them any power over me, it helps me and… well, kind of helps you as well.”

Ryan scoffs.

“You keep taunting them, though. It builds up a huge amount of energy every time you do it!”

Shane huffs.

“I’m just drawing them out. So I can tell them to fuck off once they do. I know it’s not perfect, but it’s the only way I know! I don’t know how else to deal with them.”

He throws up his hands.

“Look. I’m sorry I lied to you, or didn’t tell you. I know that was a dick move. But by the time I thought about it, my position as the skeptic was so ingrained that you would have thought I’m mocking you! And for the record, you _do_ still jump at thin air and the creaking of an old house and the wind. I wasn’t ready to have someone think that _this shit_ was a real ghost, so I kept in my corner and… just didn’t mention it.”

Ryan isn’t sure what to do. Part of him wants to punch Shane. It feels both unfair and justified. He definitely wants to challenge Shane’s methods, because he still thinks it’s stupid and dangerous, but maybe, it’s not the right time for it. Not yet, at least. Right now, he has to address something else.

“And… you gave up the entire charade just to protect me from a ghost?”

Shane flushes again, full face this time.

“Well.. I guess so. Yes. No reason to be smug about it.”

Ryan steps forward and smiles up at Shane. He smiles the smuggest smile he can measure.

“You gave up your entire ‘Ghosts aren’t real’ thing just to protect me? God, Shane, if I didn’t know any better I would say you like me.”

Shane rolls his eyes and Ryan can’t suppress a giggle.

“I’m not having this conversation with the remains of Mr. Crowbar and his dad hanging out here.” Shane growls and bends down to grab all their equipment. His right arm is full, but his left hand reaches out and grabs Ryan’s wrist.

“Let’s go somewhere non haunted so you can gloat all you want.”

Ryan shifts his arm and moves to take Shane’s hand. He squeezes the fingers.

“Okay.” He says softer. “Let’s. And then You can tell me more about the ones you shoo’ed off, hero.”

Shane scoffs at that, but there is a small smile on his face. He doesn’t let go of Ryan’s hand as they leave the house behind and when Ryan drives them back towards the hotel in search of a fast food place on the road, Shane reaches out and puts a hand on his knee and leaves it there.

Their views on how to deal with ghosts are really varied, so much is clear to Ryan. But it seems that, when it comes to them, they’re on the same page.

He feels a small smile on his lips and when he glances over quickly, he sees it mirrored on Shane’s face.


	23. Cruiseship AU - Performer! Ryan and Photographer! Shane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Inspired by doppelgangers i saw on my cruise. Ryan is a performer in the musical shows and shane is one of the photographers on board

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Different Jobs AU, Photographer! Shane, Musical Actor/Performer! Ryan, References to Hairspray, Shane has some self-worth issues  
> Rating: T

The stage of the _Calliope_ is bigger than any cruise ship’s Ryan has ever been on. He and the troupe get a little lost in blocking and re-blocking the show for the new venue. The director has already slipped out for his seventh cigarette break and it’s getting a little concerning. Ryan looks at his co-star who just shrugs. She is twisting in the cute blue dress that is part of her costumes and Ryan snorts and pulls her into a spin. Somewhere behind the stage, “The nicest kids in town” is playing and everyone else seems pretty chill with the new place.

 

They eventually figure all of it out. _Hairspray_ is still well liked, because it’s bright and happy and positive. Ryan isn’t sure if the rich and mighty are the crowd who gets most excited about the show, but they definitely seem to like it. When he’s not on stage, he glimpses out through the curtains and from behind the backstage door. Most of the guests are dressed in all kinds of expensive outfits, but they keep it pretty tasteful. Ryan swipes the lock that is half-plastered to his forehead to give him that _I’m trying to keep my hair in line_ look Link Larkin is rocking out of his eyes and looks around. The waiters and waitresses are pretty busy and Ryan knows alcohol is flowing on these cruises like mad. He hears a click and looks to his left.

 

A man is standing nearby. He’s dressed in dark chinos and a black Henley with a jean jacket over it. Apart from that, he has several bags and pieces of equipment strapped to him, all of which seems to belong to the camera he is holding in his hands. They’re nice hands, Ryan notices. Long fingered and lean. The man isn’t exactly what he would consider conventionally attractive, but in a weird way, he’s sort of cute. His face is long, his nose is big and his eyes kind of droopy. But he has soft, fluffy brown hair and a nice stubble covering his chin and jaw. He’s also tall. Really, really tall and Ryan licks his lips thinking about someone that height pinning him to the next wall to kiss him senseless.

 

_Okay Ryan, chill your bi little brain. It’s just a photographer._

 

Said photographer stands up to his full height – and Ryan can’t help but gulp a little at that – and removes the lens of his camera, swapping it for another one with quick, practiced movement. When he looks up, his gaze brushes Ryan and Ryan can’t help it, he lifts a hand in greeting and smiles a bit. The guy pauses and then grins and waves back.

 

Somewhere between high school and college, Ryan has learned to always follow what’s happening on the show even if he was paying attention to something else. He knows he’s going to be on stage in five, so he just smirks at the tall guy, gestures towards the stage and shrugs apologetically. The photographer seems amused and just nods and gives him a thumbs up. Ryan chuckles as the thumbs up turns into finger guns and a wink. He pretends to swoon and sees the guy’s ears pinken. _Interesting_. He smiles at the man before he ducks backstage and gets ready for his number.

 

-

 

After the show, he finds the photographer again. He is ambling about, offering people at the tables to take their picture on the _Calliope_ with the show’s scenery in the background. From what Ryan can see, the guy is joking a lot, making people laugh genuine laughter while he is taking pictures. Afterwards, he shows them the tablet he is carrying in a bag under his arm, probably showing off their pictures on a big screen. He hands out business cards and Ryan can see him collect the odd tip, always humble and grateful. Ryan is hanging out at the bar and buffet. He normally focuses on buffets and stacks his plate with a bunch of fried food, but tonight, he is distracted. Ryan isn’t sure what exactly draws him to the guy. He is neither particularly hot or charming, but there is just something about him that seems friendly and comforting and, as embarrassing it feels, Ryan could use someone who is just supportive and nice.

 

Luckily, his interest doesn’t seem as one-sided as he has feared, because eventually, the guy passes the bar and just quickly grabs a sausage roll to stuff his face with before he is heading straight for Ryan. Ryan knows he should probably fall into a pose that makes him look aloof and charming, but he is sick and tired of all the flirting tips he has gotten over the years. He feels a genuine attraction to this man, so he decides to be genuine in return.

 

“Uh. Hey.” The man smiles down at Ryan and Ryan feels his stomach flip a little. “I saw you earlier, remember me?”

Ryan chuckles. “Yeah, uh. I do remember. Did you think I wouldn’t?”

The photographer smiles thinly.

“It depends on the person. There are some who consider the staff kind of… replaceable. They don’t recall our names or faces. Not that your crew did that, but some other show folk have done that. Sorry.”

Ryan waves him off.

“No worries, you’re not insulting me or anything. I know some people have huge egos.”

The man nods.

“Is it okay if I hang out here a bit?”

Ryan blinks.

“Of course! You don’t have to ask that.”

The guy leans against the wall next to Ryan and he seems to relax a little as he looks over and smiles. He has a nice smile and Ryan finds himself mirroring it.

“I guess I got in touch with too many… uh, complicated people.” The man says and laughs. “There are some people who don’t want to be seen with me.”

Ryan frowns.

“Why the fuck not?”

The guy shrugs.

“Classicism, I think? I’m just a dude taking pictures of people who deserve having their picture taken because they are rich and beautiful.” He sounds a little bitter and Ryan feels himself nodding.

“Yeah, I get it. The kind who wants entertainment but treats entertainers like dancing monkeys. I know what you mean.”

He catches the guy shoot him a look, measuring and unsure.

“I’m sorry you get that shit, too. If it helps, I thought your show was really amazing.”

Ryan smiles.

“It does. Thank you.”

The photographer laughs and it sounds of relief.

“I’m Shane, by the way.”

He holds out his hand and Ryan shakes it.

“I’m Ryan.”

Shane smiles back at him and Ryan could swear he sees a sparkle in those hazel eyes.

“Well, Ryan. I took a bunch of pictures of your show… wanna help me pick the best ones?”

 

They end up at a table in the back where they go through the pictures Shane took. Ryan is impressed. Whatever Shane did to take and edit them, the colors are popping wonderfully, which has always been something that was very important to him in this show. Shane also seems to be able to capture movement very well without causing the picture to blur. Ryan smiles down at a picture of the main actress and him and he feels great.

 

“Is that your girlfriend?” Shane asks.

Ryan knows that tone. That actively by-the-by behavior. The question that was really a different one: “Are you single or are you taken?”

He decides to go easy on the guy.

“No, no. She’s a great friend but we could never fit together like that.” He laughs.

“I had a boyfriend a while ago, but it didn’t work out so I’ve been living the single life ever since.”

Shane looks over at him, eyes widening and Ryan smirks at him.

 

They don’t push anywhere that night. Instead, they talk about pictures and Shane explains to him what adjustments he made to capture the colors so well. Ryan listens intently but still instantly forgets half of it. He admits it to Shane, who just laughs and promises to teach him again and again if he wants to.

 

-

 

After that, they are sort of glued at the hip. Some of Shane’s photographs are just for Ryan. Moments during the show where Shane had zoomed in to take a picture of Ryan looking especially good. Ryan feels flattered, but he also is worried. He doesn’t want this guy to believe that he is just talking to him so he gets the best pictures.

 

He makes a plan. On one of the nights they don’t have a show, he hangs around the dining room until Shane is done taking pictures. He waves at the other man to catch his attention and his heart flutters when he sees that face split into a smile. They hang out in the kitchen. The cook lets them, because they are technically staff and each of them is sitting in the back with a filled plate while talking.

 

“I was wondering.” Ryan starts, pushing himself to continue. “Do you maybe want to hang out at my cabin later? Each of the actors got a bottle of Champagne as a gift from the captain. But drinking alone sounds like a stupid idea.”

He is laughing for good measure, but the way Shane’s eyes widen almost makes him laugh even more.

“Uh, I mean. Are you sure you don’t want to keep it for a better occasion?”

Ryan leans in, not too much, but enough to insinuate something.

“I can’t think of a better occasion than sharing it with you.”

There it is, the clear breach from fun flirting to serious flirting and he doesn’t miss Shane swallowing.

“I mean… I feel really honored…”

Ryan’s heart starts to beat faster and faster as he is waiting for the “but”. It doesn’t come, however.

“Are you sure?” Shane asks, eyes wide and stunned. Ryan frowns at him.

“Of course I’m sure! Why wouldn’t I?”

Shane blinks and actually blushes.

“I mean. You’re a pretty popular actor and singer and dancer. I’m just a dude who takes pictures.”

And Ryan understands. His heart melts a little as he looks at Shane.

“You were never just a dude who takes pictures to me. I would love to hang out with you whichever way you want, Shane. Okay?”

Shane only nods, face pink.

 

-

 

They share the Champagne and talk about shows and pictures and filming. Shane explains a bit about his camera to Ryan. He picks through some adjustments and talks about exposure and light with Ryan slouching on the bed next to him. Ryan doesn’t quite understand what Shane is getting at, until he catches a certain sentence:

“See, most people on these cruises are rich, privileged white people. Photographing them is easy because many cameras are made to take their picture. But when someone has brown or olive or black skin, you have to fiddle with exposure a bit.”

Ryan watches him with interest. They are about half way into the bottle and Ryan has taken off his blazer. He is still wearing the pink shirt and maroon pants after discarding the tie. Shane picks a lens and sits up to point the camera at Ryan. Ryan looks up, champagne flute in one hand, eyes wide and the flash goes off, less blinding than he expected. Shane takes his tablet and swipes across the screen a bit and Ryan sits up to look over his shoulder. He sees himself, leaning on the bed, slightly surprised… and his skin _glows_. The brown tint fits the reddish outfit so well he feels his breath stop.

“See, babe?” He hears Shane say. “I told you. You’re a sight to behold. Living, breathing art. I’m just some dude who takes pictures.”

“Ah.” Ryan empties his flute and puts it away. He is familiar with the feeling of inadequacy.

“You think I’m just hanging with you because you take good pictures?”

Shane’s eyebrows twitch upwards.

“Uh… I don’t want to sound like I have a bad impression of you- It’s just-”

Ryan smiles.

“I get it. A bunch of people in the business have seduced you for you to take nice pictures of them?”

Shane chuckles.

“No, it never actually gets to the seducing. They just hang with me a bit and I take a bunch of pictures and then I leave.” He seems to sigh. “It’s okay. I’m doing it for the art. Not just so someone… I don’t know. Owes me affection, I guess.”

Ryan chuckles.

“Clearly they don’t owe you anything. But in return, you don’t owe them either, okay?”

Shane seems to frown.

“But I’m not an actor. My job _is_ to take pictures of people like you.”

Ryan smiles softly.

“And that makes you a great person. You put so much thought in what you’re doing. Your photographs are beautiful. And you put so much work into them. Work you really don’t have to put in just for a couple of show photographs.”

He smiles softly at Shane and it seems to work, because the other man is flushing and moving in his seat.

“I’m… I’m not doing it for attention.”

“I get that.” Ryan whispers. He reaches out and runs a hand through Shane’s soft hair. “I guess you just caught mine. Do you… not want it?”

Despite everything, Ryan wants to make sure. Shane could simply be intimidated by sitting next to someone who is kind of a “celebrity”, even though Ryan never saw himself that way. He doesn’t want Shane to go along with something, just because Ryan is popular. But apparently, his fear had been absurd.

Shane blinks and laughs and leans in a little.

“Of course I do. I have to admit, I kind of felt drawn to you from the second I saw you at the backstage door. But I’m just- And you are- Ryan are you even aware of how _gorgeous_ you are?”

Ryan chuckles.

“Well, that’s convenient. Because while I’m not sure what about your admittedly strange face is so interesting to me… I have to admit I’m pretty smitten with you.”

Shane’s eyes widen. Ryan sees him swallow hard and shuffle back a little. Ryan feels a sting of pain and discomfort.

“I mean… I’m sorry if that was too forward. I guess I just wanted you to know that I’m not just some celebrity who wants nice pictures or is bored. I actually like you. And I’m happy to have met you.”

Ryan means it. They have talked about a lot of random things and during that time, Ryan has realized that he and Shane fit together perfectly. Almost all of their interests overlap, they have the same type of humor and the same taste in movies. The only thing they really disagree on is the existence of the supernatural, but their “fight” had quickly melted into an excited talk about their favorite Horror films.

 

“Ryan… you don’t want this. Me. You don’t want _me._ I’m a huge mess. I wanted to be _someone_ and now I take pictures of rich people on cruises, sucking up to them so they will leave me a nice tip. I’m a fucking failure. You have seen me. You know it.”

Ryan almost laughs, but he doesn’t because Shane seems honestly upset. He takes the man’s hands.

“Listen, Shane. I really don’t have a negative opinion of your job. I’m a bit upset about how little confidence you have in it, because I think it’s cool and you are really good at it. I still hope you will send me that picture you took earlier. And if you don’t like me that way, it’s cool. But if you are interested, I would like you to… well, stay here. Tonight.”

Shane’s eyes seem huge in the low light of Ryan’s cabin.

“Really?” He finally manages.

Ryan smiles and leans in to press a kiss to the corner of the other man’s mouth.

“I know you’re sometimes around a bunch of douches with too much money, but just because I work on a stage doesn’t mean I share their views on things.”

“No.” Shane says softly. “I mean… I didn’t think you would.”

He glances at Ryan. It seems like he is trying to get across an apology.

“I guess I was just worried that someone as magnificent as you would settle for someone as average as… well, me.”

Ryan’s breath stops for a second.

“Please.” He whispers. “Please don’t think you’re ever less than perfect, okay?”

Shane chuckles a bit as Ryan leans in.

“Aren’t those song lyrics?”

Ryan smirks, their lips almost touching. “Maybe?”

Shane’s smile widens and Ryan feels a huff of laughter.

“I would love to stay with you, if you let me. And I will allow you to try and proof to me that I am nice to look at.”

Ryan snorts and cups the other man’s face in his hands.

“I promise I’ll do my very best, love.”

Shane blinks and stares at him and then his tongue darts out to wet his lips. Ryan can hear the sound of Shane’s camera turning off as the man puts it aside.

“Okay.” Ryan feels the whisper more than he hears it. Shane’s breath tickles his lips. “Show me.”

Ryan doesn’t let him ask twice.


	24. Unknowingly Domestic - Friends to Lovers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Prompt for your amazing blog which I only just discovered and are now in love with: Ghoulboys being domestic and soft unknowingly and when someone points it out, they either 1) freak out and try to deny it/ avoid each other until someone else like locks them in a room or something or 2) carry on being soft and make it “official” but don’t tell anyone so someone is like “why don’t you just date already” and they’re like “we are, haven’t you noticed?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Feelings Realization (kind of), Friends to Lovers, Various Other Buzzfeed Employees: TJ, Kelsey I, Jen, Steven, Mark  
> Rating: T, probably

There are a lot of things that show that Shane and Ryan are best friends. Their banter is one of them, even if it gets a little harsh once in a while. Sometimes, a few of their fans get a little concerned sometimes and leave questions about if the two of them really are friends. But just as often, there is a fan of the show laughing and talking about all the times they argue and banter with their friends in a manner that would make someone on the outside question if their friendship was true. Whether it’s Ryan or Shane who finds the message first, both the ghoulfriends will end up giggling about it at some point. They never question their friendship and dedication to each other. It isn’t just Unsolved or the “kernelhead” solidarity. Ryan feels safer when Shane is with him on location. Shane feels more energized when Ryan is around him whenever they work. It’s the trust that comes with knowing someone a long time that helps them chill out.

 

They are comfortable with each other.

They don’t quite notice yet, that some people think they might be “too” comfortable.

 

-

 

One night, Shane and Ryan are out at a bar with some colleagues. Ryan asks if it’s cool to invite a couple of people he knows, because he gets a text message asking about a good location to spend Saturday night. Everyone encourages him to invite his friends over and half an hour later, four people wander into the bar, looking a little lost until they spot Ryan. Introductions are made and Ryan, Shane and their colleagues shift at the table to make room for the people joining them. It gets a bit cramped in the corner booth and Shane untangles his arm from where it’s squished and throws it over the back of the seat, right behind Ryan’s shoulders. Nobody who is sober enough to check sees any indication that Ryan is uncomfortable. The arm eventually settles around his shoulders, holding him upwards after Ryan nearly falls into him, obviously drunk.

Shane shakes him awake and laughs when Ryan grumbles at him.

“I think the little guy had enough. What do you say, Ryan? Wanna go home?”

Ryan opens his eyes a little and glares at him, but eventually, the look softens and he closes his eyes and nods. Shane chuckles and lets go of him to pull out his wallet and put some money on the table. People shift around and vacate the bench so Shane can slip out, one hand holding onto Ryan’s wrist until Ryan stands, a little wobbly. Shane pulls him against his shoulder and waves at everyone still sitting.

“That was fun, we should do that again!” He jostles Ryan ever so slightly. “Ryan, say goodnight to everyone.”

Ryan works his eyes open and gives a smile and a half-hearted wave and Shane chuckles. He nods to the table before turning and pulling Ryan along. His arm stays around the shorter man, maneuvering them safely out of the bar.

One of Ryan’s friends turns to TJ. He looks a little confused.

“I didn’t know Ryan was dating… Shane was his name, right?”

TJ takes a sip from his drink and shrugs.

“He isn’t, to my knowledge.”

The other man raises an eyebrow and looks after the two. Then he shrugs as well and returns to the conversation on the table.

 

-

 

Taco Tuesday means that Ryan spends his entire break eating, because he adores tacos. It also means, that he’s usually not that hungry on Wednesday, suffering from a “food-hangover”, as he calls it. Ryan has been poking at his mac’n’cheese for the last five minutes, not really eating much. He mostly pushes the food around on his plate. Jen takes a sip from her coke and shakes her head.

“Ryan you look like a toddler, stop that.”

She snorts as he gives her a playful look and scoops some of the gooey pasta on his fork, pretending to catapult it in her direction.

“I said _stop_ acting like a toddler, jeez!” She giggles and looks up.

“Shane! Help me! Ryan wants to bombard me with cheese and noodles!”

“Well we can’t have that.” Shane says, clearly amused. He has walked over, possibly curious what the fuss was about. “Food waste is a terrible crime.”

Ryan shuffles to the side so Shane can sit next to him. He’s only carrying his water bottle.

“Do you want the rest of my food?” Ryan asks as a greeting.

“Sure.” Shane reaches out for the plate, but Ryan suddenly hesitates.

“It probably got my saliva in there, though, now that I think about it.”

Shane snorts.

“I don’t care, Ryan. I’m cool with soft germs.” With that, he pulls Ryan’s plate in front of him, picks a fork out of the cup on the table and shovels a bite into his mouth. Ryan looks at him, shaking his head, but he is smiling.

Jen lifts an eyebrow, looking between the boys. When Ryan catches her staring, she pretends to zone out.

 

-

 

Kelsey I. thinks that Shane is probably one of the weirdest people at Buzzfeed and that’s saying something. At the same time, he is really funny so hanging out with him during the break is a lot of fun. He is trying to explain to her what the hell is happening in the Hot Daga at the moment, but she still doesn’t understand how the hell he even ended up writing a story about anthropomorphic food in space.

“You know what, let’s just sit down in the lounge and I’ll show you season one and you can tell me what you think.

“Isn’t that all part of your postmortems? Are you going to skip through a bunch of videos now?”

Shane laughs.

“Oh no, don’t worry. Someone on Youtube has made a mastercut of the complete seasons.”

Kelsey blinks. She wants to ask why the hell someone would do something like that, but it’s Youtube and there are weirder compilations out there. So instead she just says:

“Of course someone has.”

 

The lounge is almost empty, except for Ryan who is leafing through a stack of papers, probably a script, considering he is holding a red pen, ready to mark things on the page. He is sitting with his back to the armrest of one of the sofas and his legs stretched out over all the seats and he doesn’t look up when they enter. However, when Shane gets closer to him, he pulls his legs up to his chest and makes room. Shane sits down without a comment and reaches out to pull Ryan’s legs on his lap. Ryan doesn’t even look up and simply stretches out over Shane’s legs. Shane doesn’t address it in the least, he simply pulls out his phone and looks to his right. There is a two-seater, perfect for Kelsey to sit down and watch the stupid animation on his phone… and she is wondering why he didn’t just sit down _there_. She looks between him and Ryan and can’t quite hold back a little smirk. He looks up, clearly confused why she stopped in her tracks. She gives a little, meaningful nod towards Ryan and he glances over, looks back at her and… frowns. As if he doesn’t get what she is insinuating.

Kelsey decides it’s none of her business in the end, even though she’s curious. She sits down on the two-seater and allows Shane to show her the madness that is the Hot Daga.

 

-

 

Snow on location is always a hazard. The crew has to take care of both their equipment and themselves, driving required extra care and walking through a forest could get a little dangerous sometimes.

They are not filming at the moment. Mark has enough shots of them taking in the landscape and they are all cold and want to get to the actual location as quickly as possible. Shane rubs his hands together to keep them warm. He keeps teasing Ryan, who takes the cold much worse than him and Ryan snaps back about the snootiness of Midwesteners, when he suddenly slips. Shane grabs his wrist and hoists him up, preventing Ryan from slamming into the ground. Ryan finds his footing again, blushes a little because of the surprised yelp he let out and pats himself down. Shane is laughing, but still asks if Ryan is okay.

They don’t dawdle for long. Once Ryan is sure he found his footing again, they press on. Shane is still holding onto Ryan, his grasp slowly migrating to hold hands with the shorter man. Ryan doesn’t seem to mind, he even entwines their fingers as they walk on.

Behind them, TJ tilts his head to the side in confusion. Mark shoots him a questioning glance and TJ shrugs, not sure if he should comment on it. He doesn’t.

 

-

 

Ryan drops on Shane’s couch and kicks his feet up on the coffee table. He grabs the controller of Shane’s PS4 and enters his password without even having to ask. While Netflix loads up, he scrolls through instagram, eyes widening at some of the fanart he has been tagged it.

“Holy Shit Shane, we got some really talented fans. There is so much!”

Shane carries a bowl of popcorn into the living room and sits down next to Ryan, glancing over his shoulder.

“Oh yeah. Hey, I think I know this artist.”

He points at a take on “Demon!Shane”, which depicts him with black eyes and the shadow of something big, winged and horned behind him. Ryan chuckles and double taps the piece.

“I have to make a new fan art appreciation post, soon.” He muses and Shane hums in agreement.

“Hey, want to take a selfie to send them some good vibes?”

“Sure!”

They shuffle closer together. Shane puts an arm around Ryan and holds up a thumbs up while Ryan leans his head against Shane’s so they both fit in frame. They take the picture of both of them squished together on the couch, smiling widely and Ryan posts it with a caption:

“Hanging out with the one and only @shanemadej for movie night and the ghoulfriend and I got distracted by looking at all the amazing art you guys are creating! Keep being awesome, we really appreciate your support!”

He locks his phone and drops it on the table in favor of grabbing the controller and picking the movie. Shane sinks in the couch and kicks up his feet as well. Two pairs of legs stretch out in front of them. Shane’s arm hasn’t moved from around Ryan’s shoulder and once Ryan puts the controller aside and places the bowl of popcorn on his lap, he settles into it.

 

They don’t see the amounts of heart eye emojis and screaming their insta has until the movie is over.

 

-

 

“Ryan… uh, can I ask you something personal?”

Ryan is sitting next to Steven and they went for coffee on their break. He shoots him a suspicious look that drags from the tips of his hair down to his shoes and back up again. Steven almost laughs.

“Sure..?” Ryan sounds very careful.

“Are you and Shane… a thing?”

“A thing.” Ryan repeats, deadpan. “Like, what thing?”

Steven huffs.

“You know what I mean. Are you two dating?”

Ryan groans and rolls his eyes.

“Not you, too. People keep asking me that. Why do people always ask me that?”

Steven makes a face. It looks like he’s a bit done with Ryan’s shit.

“I don’t know. Maybe because you hold hands? Share food? Go home together when one of you is drunk?”

“How do you even know all this stuff?” Ryan says, a little incredulous.

Steven just shrugs. “I don’t know, people. People talk.”

“Apparently they do…” Ryan rolls his eyes. “But no, we’re not _a thing_.”

Steven shoots him a look and Ryan sputters.

“I’m not lying to you, Steven!”

“I didn’t say that! I just- you guys go on movie dates-”

“They’re not _dates_. We both love movies and watching alone is boring!”

“You walk around holding hands-”

“So do you and Jen sometimes and nobody asks if you are _dating_.”

Steven sighs.

“You know what? Maybe it was stupid of me. Forget it.”

“Already forgotten.” Ryan huffs and pulls out his phone.

 

He’s lying.

He can’t forget it now.

 

-

 

“Shane?”

“Hm?”

Shane looks up from the book he’s been reading. He is lying on his bed with his head in Ryan’s lap. Ryan is sitting on the mattress, legs crossed and scrolling through social media. His hand is in Shane’s hair, occasionally scratching the scalp.

“Are we… dating?”

Shane closes his book and looks up at him.

“Not to my knowledge.”

“Oh good.”

Shane frowns a little and Ryan laughs.

“Not- Not like _good, I would hate to date you_ , just like… people asked me if we were and I assumed we aren’t.”

“No, Ryan. We aren’t dating. If we were, I would actually take you to restaurants, not head for the nearest Drive-thru.”

Ryan pouts.

“But I like fast-food.”

“Well then.” Shane says, opening his book again to find the page he stopped at. “Then, I guess, we’re kind of dating. Maybe?”

Ryan frowns at the air in front of him.

“Maybe?!” He echoes. “I think we should know if we are or not.”

Shane closes his book again. He sits up and Ryan’s hand drops out of his hair. Shane shuffles around till he’s sitting and facing Ryan.

“Do you want to? Date, I mean.”

Ryan pauses and thinks.

“Not just… because people think we are, right?”

“No.” Shane chuckles and puts his book away. “I’m asking because I like you. And I think we would be a great couple.”

“Really?” Ryan asks, not sure if he’s surprised or not.

Shane shrugs.

“If you don’t want to, that’s fine. But… I kind of want to, if I’m honest.”

“Huh.” Ryan says, blinking. He thinks for a moment, with Shane patiently waiting in front of him. Then-

“You know what? I like the idea.”

Shane smiles.

“Alright.” He says softly. “I guess that means we’re dating now.”

Ryan laughs. “What, just like that?”

“Sure.” Shane shrugs. “What else is there to decide you’re dating?”

Ryan eyes him up and down for a moment.

“Well, I guess we could try and kiss, for a start?”

Shane smiles.

“I’m into that.”

Ryan’s face splits into a grin.

“Cool.”

 

Shane shifts a bit till he sits right next to Ryan, their hips touching. He places a hand on the back of Ryan’s neck and Ryan puts a hand on Shane’s knee as he’s pulled in. They meet in the middle, their eyes slipping shut as they kiss and one of them makes a soft humming noise before they part.

 

“Shane?”

“Hm?”

“Let’s not tell the others just yet. I want to…”

“See them squirm?”

Ryan throws his head back and laughs. The sight causes Shane to wheeze and drop to his side, propped up on one elbow. Once Ryan has himself under control again, he leans in and braces himself over the other man’s body.

“Yeah. I kinda want to see them try and figure it out for a while. Is that too mean?”

Shane chuckles and rolls on his back, Ryan moving with him until he’s bracketing Shane with his arms.

“Never. I _love_ it.” Shane admits with a slightly sadistic grin and Ryan grins back, tongue pocking out between his teeth.

“Alright!” He says and leans down to kiss Shane again. Shane hums and smiles into the kiss, wrapping his arms around Ryan's back.

 

They post to instagram that night, with the single goal to mess with people. Ryan is sitting on Shane’s bed, legs crossed and looking relaxed and surprisingly chill for having a plush figure of one of the Hot Daga characters on his lap. Shane is taking the picture, sitting on the floor in front of his bed, with his back leaning against it. He gives an enthusiastic thumbs up.

The caption reads: “We got em!”

 

Not even a third of the comments address the issue of Ryan appreciating the Hot Daga. The reactions are occupied with different things. Including the very visible hickey on Ryan’s neck.


	25. First Date - Movie and Popcorn night - FLUFF

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> It’s a pretty normal prompt but it’s just one of those cute little movie popcorn dates, and it’s all soft and shit. UwU

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: First Date, Fluff, so much fluff, Popcorn (needs its own tag this time)  
> Rating: G

Shane is oddly nervous. He checks if Netflix works – it does – makes sure he has enough butter, salt and popcorn kernels – _duh_ , even if he has literally no other edible things, these three things are always in his home – and runs into the bathroom _again_ to sniff himself and his shirt, just so he can be _absolutely_ positive that he doesn’t smell – he doesn’t, his deodorant actually smells pretty nice.

 

At the same time, he does and doesn’t know why he’s freaking out. It makes sense for him to be nervous, because this is technically a first date. A first date with someone he has known for a long time. Someone who has been his friend, his _best friend_ for years. Of course he would be nervous on a first date. Of course he _should_ be nervous if one of his relationships transitions into something… more. At the same time it feels kind of stupid to be this worried.

Shane and Ryan have met for movie night countless times. They made popcorn, sat down on the couch and watched whatever was next on their list. Right, the list.

Shane opens it up on his phone to check it – for the sixth time. Unless he is very, very, very, very wrong, “Zodiac” is next on their list. Ryan knows the movie, Shane does not. He actually doesn’t know much about it. He knows Jake Gyllenhaal is in it, and for a second he worries that Ryan might get too interested in the movie for a first date. What can he say, Gyllenhaal is really handsome.

He lowers his phone and makes a face at nothing. Is he really getting jealous about Ryan possibly paying more attention to Gyllenhaal than him? He clearly is out of his mind. They always meet to watch movies and the main goal of those hangouts is to _watch the movie_. Their date isn’t _just_ the movie, so Shane tries to calm himself down.

 

Ryan will come over and they will watch a cool movie with a really good looking and great-at-what-he-does actor and they will bond over the connections to their True Crime episode and they will have _fun_. Shane relaxes a bit. His main goal for the evening is that both have fun and he is pretty confident that they will achieve it. It’s what finally gets him to calm down a little.

 

-

 

When his doorbell rings, Shane takes a deep breath – more to pause than to calm himself. He has been pacing the last ten minutes and he doesn’t want to seem desperate or too worried. It’s less that he thinks about his ego and more that he’s afraid of scaring Ryan off with his fretting. So he buzzes the other man in and waits by the door, because even though he doesn’t want to seem desperate, he still wants to be a good host.

 

“Hey.” He says when Ryan reaches his floor. “Got here okay?”

“Yeah.” Ryan smiles and Shane’s stomach flips because he looks great. He’s wearing a dark button down with short sleeves, which at the same time shows off his arms and makes his skin look amazing. Other than that, he is wearing jeans and sneakers, so he is not overdressed and Shane isn’t underdressed in comparison. He holds out an arm to offer Ryan a hug and Ryan wraps his arms around him and gives him a slight squeeze. Shane smiles as the other man leans up to kiss his cheek. It’s a good start.

 

-

 

“Zodiac” is fascinating and Shane forgets about fretting about their first date, forgets about possible jealousy of Jake Gyllenhaal and just watches intently. He and Ryan share a bowl of popcorn, despite Ryan’s occasional slight germaphobia. Shane expects him to mention how unhygienic it is to share snacks like that, but there is no complaint at all. Ryan’s eyes are fixed on the screen with suspense while he stuffs a fist full of popped kernels in his mouth. One escapes him and drops in his lap and before he can reach for it, Shane grabs it and pops it into his own mouth. He catches Ryan stare and the slightest hint of pink on those cheeks and Shane feels like he accomplished something.

 

Halfway into the movie, Shane thinks about the old “stretch-move” to get his arm around Ryan, but he decides that he should be a little more… genuine about it. He looks at Ryan and waits for him to notice. Ryan glances over at him, before stiffening and turning to look at him for real, unspoken questions on his face. Shane carefully lifts his arm and very visibly sets out to wrap it around Ryan’s shoulders. He pauses before touching Ryan. Ryan stares at him for a moment before smiling widely. His hand reaches out to grab Shane’s and he pulls the arm around his shoulders. Shane laughs softly as he feels Ryan exhale and relax under his half-hug. He leans a little closer and relishes in the warmth that ends up pressed to his side.

 

Once the film is over, Ryan ask Shane all sorts of questions about it, mostly curious about how well he liked it, what he thought of the tension build-up and others. Shane is happy to just chat about movies and they both get a little too excited about some of the greater moments. His arm hasn’t moved from around Ryan’s shoulders and Ryan doesn’t seem to mind.

After a while, they settle in a kind of lull, relaxing and just sitting together. Shane thinks about things to do. They could watch something else, maybe something romantic, even. They could order food or have a couple of drinks. He isn’t sure about either, so he just offers to make more popcorn.

 

Ryan picks one of the un-popped kernels from the bowl and flicks it at Shane with a laugh.

“Sounds good, big guy.”

 

-

 

Shane is watching the popcorn machine thoughtfully. He’s leaning against the counter and wonders what Ryan is doing. He is probably scrolling through Netflix. Unbidden, the question if this is a good date comes to Shane’s mind. Technically, except for the half-cuddle, their date so far has not been any different than their usual movie nights. Shane isn’t sure if he should change anything, though. Because they are having fun, at least he thinks they do. A date should be fun, right? He is having fun with a person he likes very much and he has at least the impression that it’s the same for Ryan. So it’s an… okay date at the very least, he decides.

 

He sighs and pours the popcorn in the bowl, swirling it around to mix it with the butter and salt.

 

“You okay?”

Shane nearly drops the bowl. He manages to suppress the flinch, however and turns over his shoulder. Ryan is standing in the doorway to his kitchen, one foot up to scratch at his shin as if he doesn’t really know if he should step into the room or not. Shane blinks.

“Of course I’m okay.”

Ryan smiles a little.

“Okay. Good. I don’t know why… so, uh, don’t take this the wrong way, but I was worried you might freak out.”

Shane looks down at the popcorn.

“I mean…” He starts, not sure where to go with the sentence. “I guess, I’m nervous? But not _super_ nervous. Not _I don’t know why I did this_ nervous. I’m just unsure if you’re having a good time.”

Ryan frowns and tilts his head as he looks at him.

“Of course I’m having a good time!”

“Oh.” Shane feels a smile split his face. “Okay, cool.”

“Is… is that your only worry?”

Shane blinks.

“Yeah? What else would there be to worry about?”

Ryan shrugs.

“I don’t know. I guess I was worried, too.” After Shane’s blank look, he sighs and continues. “I think I was worried you might regret things. Like, us becoming something different, I mean.”

“Oh.” Shane hasn’t even thought about that. He suddenly feels a little bad for not questioning how Ryan was doing.

“I didn’t worry about that.” He finally says. “I just hoped you had fun and didn’t regret it.”

“I see.” Ryan seems almost amused. “Well, I guess if you don’t regret it and I don’t regret it, that’s a good start.”

Shane laughs.

“Yeah, gotta agree with you there.”

 

-

 

They drop back on the couch, cuddling a little closer this time. Ryan compliments Shane’s popcorn and they switch to a fun little rom-com to play in the back while they are chatting. Ryan throws popcorn at Shane when he makes fun of Ryan’s view on alien invasions and Shane fires back with a bag of gummy worms. Once they clean up the sofa again, Shane is relaxed with laughter and melts against Ryan who holds him up, solid and warm. They switch from chatting about movies to talking about anything to… not talking.

Shane’s lips brush Ryan’s temple and he is only a little surprised when the shorter man shifts and captures Shane’s lips in a proper kiss. The kisses that follow are soft and warm and popcorn flavored and Shane smiles into them when Ryan throws his legs over Shane’s lap.

They sit together on the couch, holding onto one another and sharing the odd kiss while the credits of the film they didn’t really watch run in the background.

 

Shane feels the warmth turn into heat on his face when he swallows and dares to ask:

“Do you want to sleep over tonight? Not like… you know. I’m not asking anything dirty. I’m just wondering…”

Ryan smiles up at him.

“I would like that, yeah. I’ll stay over if you want me to.”

“Ah… okay. That’s great.” Shane kisses the top of Ryan’s head and is rewarded with a chuckle.

 

“Wanna watch Ghostbusters?”

Ryan laughs out loud.

“We both watched that… how many times?”

“Hundreds!” Shane grins at him. “I still love it. You game?”

Ryan looks him up and down, arms still wrapped around Shane’s middle and his legs thrown over Shane’s lap.

“Sure. I’m always up for Ghostbusters.”

Free from any worries, Shane giggles. Ryan kisses his cheek and jaw while he is picking the film and it’s sappy but also very nice. Once the intro is playing, he cups Ryan’s face again to kiss him some more.

“Hope the popcorn lasts.” He finally says. “Because I’m not getting up soon!”

He can almost imagine Ryan’s grip tighten around his waist.

“Fuck the popcorn,” Ryan mutters and he laughs when Shane gasps dramatically. “I don’t care about it right now.”

“Blasphemy.” Shane mutters against Ryan’s mouth.

“Eh.” Ryan shrugs. “You taste like it anyway, so I’m good.”

Shane smirks and kisses him again. Ryan’s right. They do still taste of popcorn.

 

Apparently, stacking up on it had also been needless worry.

Shane is fine with it. Better safe than sorry.


	26. Angel! Ryan saves human Shane by exposing his powers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Could you write angel!ryan healing Shane after he got a bit scraped up from a demon attacking him from all his taunting (Ryan had to reveal his angelic nature to protect him before he got actually hurt) and just the conversation that would happen after now that Shane has, not only conformation that the supernatural exists, but that Ryan himself is actually and angel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Angel! Ryan, Demons, Human Shane, Hurt/Comfort, Getting Together, minor description of injury and blood, Ryan is still a nerd  
> Rating: T

****“Come on, demon! Rip out our spines! Burn us! Scratch us! My…” Shane thinks for a second, trying to pick an appropriate body part. “My liver is yours for the taking!” _Sure, why not._

It stays quiet for a moment. Next to him, Ryan scoffs loudly.

“You’re insane.” He states and Shane could laugh at it. “You really _do_ want to die, do you?”

Shane smiles over at his ghost-hunting companion. Of course he doesn’t. When it comes to the real world, Shane is easily scared. He can think of many unlikely but deadly scenarios he might be afraid of, and despite Ryan’s jokes, that includes getting injected with heroin against his will, choking on an avocado pit and getting decapitated by a cannonball. But ghosts and demons aren’t real, so taunting them will have no effect on his well-being, of course. Ryan might believe they are and while Shane thinks that’s definitely wrong, he respects Ryan’s beliefs. And usually, he doesn’t quite go _too far_ with taunting thin air, at least in his book. By the end of the day, he does it to help Ryan, to make him laugh or distract him from his own panic. Anything that makes Ryan either laugh or snap at him helps with the terror he sometimes sees in his friend’s eyes.

Speaking of which, Ryan looks pretty worried this time. His eyes are darting from side to side and he seems… on edge. 

 

Shane blows a raspberry into the air and shines his flashlight around, looking for the next room.

“Come on, this room is boring.”

Ryan doesn’t protest at first, but when Shane starts walking towards the kitchen, Ryan quickly scampers after him.

“Wait! Shane let me-”

“Really?” Shane turns around, shining his flashlight sort of over Ryan’s shoulder so he doesn’t blind him or flash the GoPro strapped to his chest. “You’re really doing this!” He huffs. “What you think- Elinor is gonna shove me into the oven like she did with her kids? Hansel and Gretel style?”

Ryan opens his mouth as if to say something, but then he pauses and snarls for a moment.

“No _that_ isn’t my concern, you’d never fit in there. But watch out, the door-”

“Yeah yeah the door’s haunted the floor’s haunted the dust is haunted, the toilet paper is probably haunted. Everything is haunted to Ryan Steven Bergara.”

He rolls his eyes as he turns and steps right through the doorway without letting Ryan answer or retort. For a moment, he could swear he hears his friend shout a warning-

 

Something hits him in the side. A flicker of confusion wafts through him, because at first he assumes Ryan shoved him or something, but then he hears the tear of fabric and feels the burning pulse of pain in his side and he gasps and drops to one knee, his flashlight falling out of his fingers and clattering to the ground where it goes dark. Shane brings a hand to his ribs and feels something wet and the skin burns and throbs even more. Did he get caught on something? But he hadn’t even reached the door, yet. This made no sense-

 

He looks up. Ryan is standing next to him and Shane, despite the low light can see his face set into an angry grimace.

 

“I fucking told you, Shane. I told you to wait, for fuck’s sake.”

Shane wants to retort something but Ryan holds up a finger towards him as if shushing him. Under normal circumstances Shane would laugh incredulously and get even louder, but Ryan holds up his other hand, palm forward and fingers splayed wide as he faces the doorway.

Something scrambles around in the dark, like a rat rushing over wooden floorboards and then Shane sees the shadows in the doorway… move. That makes no sense. They aren’t moving, the film team isn’t moving. Their lights are all in one place and yet the shadows slip over the floor and merge.

 

And then a shape bursts out of the ground where the shadows tightened and Shane catches a glimpse of a pale face in the darkness and burning eyes before two clawed hands reach out towards them. He instinctively cowers down and thrusts out his hand to grab Ryan and pull him down, get him out of the way but Ryan actually steps forward and Shane hears another shriek. It’s ear piercing and he brings his hands up to press the palms to his ears. He hears the crew behind them groan and yelp in pain and something falls to the ground over there. The shadow _thing_ however stops in its tracks, shudders and then the darkness tears apart and they are left with the room as it was before, empty and with all the shadows in place.

 

Shane’s mouth stands open and he slowly looks over at Ryan only to see the man _glowing_. Not as he sometimes does when the sunlight catches his skin in the right way, no. Ryan’s eyes are bright and shine golden, there is a corona of gleams around his head and face and Shane thinks he might pass out so he closes his eyes and tries to steady himself.

 

It doesn’t really work.

 

His eyes are closed but despite everything, he sees the light. Not the way a person sees light with their eyes closed: Red and tinted by the capillaries in their eyelids. He only sees bright, golden light. It should sting in his eyes, the way looking into the sun does, but instead, it feels soothing. Even welcoming. He can hear Ryan above him muttering words. Shane tries to listen in, but he doesn’t understand. His first thought is that Ryan might be speaking Spanish, but while Shane doesn’t know Spanish, he heard enough to be able to tell that that’s not it. He wrecks his brain about what languages Ryan speaks. Japanese, maybe? Whatever people speak on the Philippines? Does Ryan even _know_ these languages? Shane isn’t sure. He should probably know. However, while he has been worrying about languages, the pain ins his body is lessening.

Shane opens his eyes and looks down. His shirt is still ripped and there is quite a bit of blood caked there, but while he is still looking, warmth spreads through his sides and he can _see_ the deep scratches knitting together again until they close, not even leaving a small scar. He looks up and notices that Ryan has placed his fingertips against his temple. His face is focused and Shane swallows under the scrutinizing glare.

 

When Ryan pulls away, Shane realizes that he is still on his knees, looking up at Ryan with a stunned expression. He glances around real quick and notices that he isn’t the only one. TJ, Mark and Devon are _all_ on their knees, some of them still with their hands hovering over their ears. Mark has a shaking camera pointed at both of them and his mouth is standing open, eyes fixed on Ryan. Devon makes a noise that sounds a little like a sob and Shane can absolutely understand the sentiment. He glances at Ryan again, suddenly afraid to meet his eyes. Ryan looks pained, eyes flicking from one person to the other.

 

“I… I can explain…”

He takes a step towards the others and stops when Mark scrambles to his feet and backs away a little.

“I’m not gonna- guys it’s still _me_ , I won’t hurt you!”

Going by the expressions of the team, they seem to _want_ to believe him. However, what he said doesn’t erase the fear completely.

Shane finally gives himself a push and slowly gets up. His knees hurt from the hard floor and even though the pain in his side is gone, he is still shaken up about the sudden, tearing scratches that dug into his flesh. Ryan turns as he notices Shane stand and looks at him guiltily, almost as if in pain. Shane swallows and decides to take initiative.

 

“I don’t even want to _pretend_ I know what exactly happened.” He starts. “But this episode is over. We’re leaving. Any questions can be answered later, I’m not staying here.” He bites his bottom lip. “Just blame it on me in the cut. Tell them I lost it and ran. I’ll play that all you want for the camera, later. But for now, let’s leave.”

 

For a second, nobody moves, but then TJ nods. Mark lowers the camera and Devon slowly gets up from the floor. Shane looks over at Ryan and Ryan tries to give him the tiniest of smiles and nods.

 _Thank you,_ he mouthes at Shane and Shane grits his teeth and just walks out. He can’t right now, he needs a moment.

 

They pile in the two cars and Shane wordlessly takes the driver’s seat. Usually it’s Ryan who's driving, but he can’t let him right now, because when Shane drives, he can focus on the road instead of freaking out and he also can call a stop to the conversation and pretend he needs to concentrate on driving. Ryan doesn’t protest. He sits down next to him and buckles in, looking miserable and distracted. Shane suddenly feels guilty. Whatever exactly happened, the one thing he is sure about is that Ryan saved him. Maybe all of them, even. He also has no other explanation for the injury going away than Ryan _making it go away_. He can’t push it on a hallucination because his shirt is still ripped and blood stained while his skin underneath is fine.

 

He pulls out of the driveway of the house and shuts his mouth tight. He doesn’t look at Ryan, doesn’t turn on the radio, barely moves in his seat when his bunched up jacket starts to dig in his bag. In the rearview mirror, he can see Mark driving and from what he can spot, the faces of their crew are pale and confused. They stay close to the other car, as if afraid that Shane and Ryan would suddenly vanish. Shane sighs. There is no reason to push it away any longer.

 

“So.” He finally breaks the silence and out of the corner of his eye he sees Ryan flinch and sit up very straight. “Congratulations, I guess.”

It’s quiet for a moment. Then Ryan speaks.

“What do you mean?” His voice is quiet, as if scared.

“I finally saw some hard evidence with my own two eyes. Whatever way I want to explain it, I just… can’t. We’re all drug-free, we all saw it, I _felt_ it. This isn’t a lie or manipulated footage or some radio frequency bullshit. As long as you are not a secret hypnotist who _made_ all of us _believe_ we saw a demon and this here is-” he lets go of the steering wheel for a second to gesture to his ruined shirt- “just in my head…” He lets the sentence run out without really finishing it. Shane tries to start a new one.

“I guess I saw the demon I always wanted. You were right, Ryan. Congratulations. I just want to mention, though, that it seems to me you had an unfair advantage.”

 

Ryan is silent for the next mile. Then he begins to speak.

 

“I’m sorry I lied to you, Shane. I never wanted to, but I had to. Part because… you shouldn’t know these things about me. And part because…” he huffs a laugh. “You wouldn’t have believed me anyway.”

“I do believe you.” Shane says softly. “I never said I didn’t believe you that you think ghosts are real.”

“I know that.” Ryan’s voice sounds flat now. “But I still was afraid. And bound to a couple of rules on top of that. Despite all of that, I’m sorry.”

Shane hums.

“So, what exactly… are you. An angel?”

He looks over and Ryan stares wistfully out of the front window.

“You could say that, yes. It’s a bit more complicated, with there being different… ranks if you will. I’m not exactly a strong warrior of the heavens. I’m just here to… help, I guess.”

Shane frowns.

“Please tell me you’re not my guardian angel.”

Ryan laughs. It sounds a little more relaxed.

“No. I would work overtime for that. I’m just here to seek out evil spirits and seal them.”

“That’s why you started Unsolved, I get it.”

The car is quiet for a second.

“Ryan…” Shane says slowly. “That _is_ why you started Unsolved, right?”

“Well… nooo? This is going to sound strange but… I just really love True Crime and the Supernatural. It’s fascinating.”

Shane thinks about stopping the car.

“You’re shitting me.”

“I’m really not! I mean I won’t tell you I can’t lie because technically, I can. But I’m telling the truth! I just find the Human view on all of this even more fascinating. And … I’m not omniscient, you know. I really try to find out about these mysteries…”

Shane groans.

“Great. A nerd angel.”

“Shut up, Shane.”

Something warm and happy rolls through him at the familiar “comeback”.

“But why the fuck are you afraid of ghosts if you can just… I don’t know, _smite_ them?”

Ryan sighs.

“I told you. I’m not exactly powerful. And just because I’m not human doesn’t mean I am incapable of fear. I … when I’m out on location I sometimes forget what I really am. I just like spending time there, with you… So I allow myself to pretend I’m human. And as a human, I get scared of spirits trying to interact. But I’m also curious. By the end of the day, the ghosts are creepy, but alright.”

He takes a deep breath.

“It’s the demons that worry me. That’s why I didn’t want to do anything demonic more than once per season.” Shane can hear him swallow.

“So.” The taller man says again, thinking about how to continue. “When I taunted the demons, you were afraid they would attack you?”

Ryan’s _no_ is so soft that Shane turns down the AC to understand him better.

“Shane, when you taunt the demons I get so afraid… so scared. I mean, I’m always afraid of them. They taunt me all the time about me not being able to control my powers as well here. They tell me they are going to kill you and make me watch. _That_ is what really scares me.”

“Then why did it… this time…”

“I guess, I was too focused on protecting you. The others, too, of course. Just- You got injured and for a second I was scared that _she_ would take you up on your taunting and actually kill you. I could have never forgiven myself just standing there and not helping.”

 

Shane is so stunned that he almost misses the exit to their hotel. He rucks the steering wheel around a little too harshly and feels the jostle as they hit the dirt road. The next minute they spend in complete silence as Shane finds a spot and puts the car in park. Then he leans back and flexes his fingers that feel stiff after being clutched around the wheel for too long.

 

“You saved my life, Ryan. I can’t imagine what a demon could do, because until earlier I thought it was all bullshit. But I assume, it wouldn’t have been pretty. Even if… even if all she could do was scratch me… You still protected all of us. And you fixed me up.”

He looks over at Ryan.

“I don’t know how much that means from a lowly human but I think you’re doing a really good job as an angel… And, as embarrassing as it sounds: I’m glad you were the one who presented me with that evidence of the Supernatural. I sure hope you don’t have to wipe our minds now and leave because that would suck really bad.”

Ryan laughs. It’s his usual laugh, head thrown back and a happy, wide grin on his face.

“I don’t know where you get that idea. No, I will not do that. I _might_ have to wipe the tape, however. Not quite the evidence but… the aftermath.”

 

Shane swallows.

“Will you… Leave? Now that we know, I mean.”

Ryan meets his eyes.

“Do you want me to leave?”

“No!” That came out a little too quickly, but Shane is shaken enough from the night to ignore possible shyness. “I would much prefer you stay. Despite this shit…” he lays a hand on his ribs. “I want to keep doing Unsolved. I want to stay friends with you. Not… sure if that does anything for angels but-”

“Shane. I told you, we are not incapable of emotions. I’m very happy you’re here with me. I’m also glad you know now… because I hated lying to you.”

Shane stares at the other man.

 

“Would it be blasphemy to tell you that I’ve been kind of into you for a while?”

Ryan blinks.

“What?”

Shane shrugs.

“I can’t help it. You’re handsome and funny and… well, we got a lot in common. And today you saved my life by being a total badass and my entire world view got sort of flipped on its head.” He sighs. “I guess I just want all the cards on the table, now that I know all of this about you.” Shane feels his mouth turn down in an unhappy grimace. “I wont mention it again, so don’t worry. But you have the right to know and I thought that- maybe-” He breaks off.

“You think that maybe I could have feelings for you as well?”

Shane winces and curls up in the car seat.

“I know it’s stupid, you don’t have to point it out. All I wanted was to be honest with you, because you answered all my questions.”

 

A warm hand settles on his shoulder and he looks over. Ryan’s eyes and face seem to be glowing again, but not in the bright, heavenly sunlight Shane saw earlier. It’s the kind of warm and open expression Shane has been hoping to see directed at him for more than a year, now. Ryan smiles widely as he reaches up and cups Shane’s face into his hands.

 

“For the record: There is nothing blasphemous about love, Shane.”

Shane freezes as Ryan leans up and gives him a soft kiss.

“Oh… That’s… good. Very good.”

Ryan chuckles.

“But I would suggest that we talk about this later. I still owe the others an apology and explanation.”

Shane nods slowly and when Ryan’s hands slip from his face, he catches and holds them.

 

“I’ll come with you. I’ll help if I have to. Demons, I apparently can’t handle. But I’m okay with humans.”

Ryan laughs again.

“Alright. Then let’s go.”

 

Shane nods. He lets go of Ryan so they can leave the car, but his hands carry a lingering warmth that just won’t quite fade.

 

It’s soothing.


	27. Shane and Ryan are secretly dating and mess with the office who is betting about their relationship status

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anonymous asked:
> 
> Uhhh...Ryan and Shane are dating but they don’t tell anyone. They don’t do pda at work but do stuff that is /slightly/ couple-y to see people squirm and wonder while laughing about it and people have bets on whether they’re a couple or not. No one is brave enough to ask until someone finally does and /they/ have some sort of bet going on and CHAOS.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Established Relationship, Secret Relationship, Office Shenanigans, Bets  
> Rating: T
> 
> Didn't deliver on the chaos as much as I would have liked, but hope you enjoy.

“I have a question. Maybe a bit of a serious one.”

Ryan shifts at the tone in Shane’s voice from where he’s been snuggled against the other man’s chest.

“What is it?”

“For the record, it’s about us, but not like- no reason to worry, I just want to know a few things.”

“Alright.” Ryan props himself up on his elbows over Shane and drags his gaze up from the naked torso to Shane’s face. Shane reaches out and curls his fingers in Ryan’s hair.

 

“So… we’re _dating_ , right? This isn’t a friends-with-benefits thing… I hope.”

Ryan chuckles and almost buries his face in Shane’s chest again, feeling a bit shy.

“Yeah.” He breathes. “Yeah we’re dating.”

“Exclusively?”

“I’d say so.”

“Good.”

The bright smile on Shane’s face makes Ryan smile in return and he leans up to steal a kiss real quick before Shane continues.

“We can plan regular date-night later,” Shane chuckles after returning the kiss. “But there is one more thing I kind of need to know.”

“Shoot.” Ryan smiles at him.

“What about work? Should we… tell HR and our colleagues and the fans or… Do you want to keep it between us?”

Ryan thinks about it for a moment, exhaling slowly as he contemplates.

“I would like to keep it between us, for now. Not because I’m ashamed… or worried or anything. I like the idea of it being just for us, for a while. So we can figure it out before getting other people involved.”

Shane nods.

“That sounds reasonable. I’m good with that.”

Ryan smiles and kisses him again.

“Great.”

When he pulls away, he catches a glint in Shane’s eyes that makes him burst into a breathless laugh.

“What, again?”

“What can I say, baby.” Shane leans in as he pulls Ryan closer. “Relationship negotiations are pretty sexy.”

Ryan rolls his eyes but cups Shane’s face anyway, kissing back as he slides closer.

 

-

 

It takes them about two weeks to realize what is going on around them. Shane is the first to notice it and he lets Ryan know when they’re in Shane’s apartment that evening, curled up on the sofa together after watching a movie.

 

“I think people are starting to catch on a little. About us, I mean.”

Ryan breaks off a yawn to throw him a surprised look.

“Really? How?”

Shane shrugs and scratches his chin.

“When you brought me coffee this afternoon, Jen was sitting nearby and I think she saw that I brushed against your fingers.” He looks a little sheepish for a moment. “I didn’t even mean to, I just felt like touching you.” As if to emphasize his point, he takes Ryan’s hand and runs his thumb over the back of his fingers.

“Oh.” Ryan says, blinking. “That’s fine, it really is. I sometimes want to hold your hand at work, too. Or put my head on your shoulder, I guess.”

Shane smiles and kisses his fingers before falling back into the thoughtful expression.

“I think, we’re at a point where we just want to be affectionate a bit more. It’s weird pretending all the time we’re at work.”

Ryan nods slowly.

“I guess we could sneak in a moment or two. I’m not that big on PDA, so…”

Shane chuckles.

“No worries, babe. I’m good with anything. I don’t need us to make out in the break room.”

That makes Ryan laugh. He cups Shane’s face and kisses him.

“Let’s see.” He muses. “I’m kind of curious if people notice. Or have noticed.”

Shane looks at him thoughtfully.

“Probably. They _do_ like to gossip at Buzzfeed. Maybe they are having a poll about it, even. I wish I knew what Jen thinks.”

Ryan sits up a bit and rubs his hands.

“What if we make a bet? I’d say if we get just a tiny bit more affectionate, we’ll be the talk of our floor by the end of… next week?”

Shane grins wolfishly.

“I say we can make them crack by the end of _this_ week if we play our cards right.”

Ryan laughs and holds out his hand.

“You got yourself a bet. Loser takes the winner to the winner’s favorite restaurant?”

“Alright.” Shane shakes his hand. “So if I lose I only gotta grab some Chipotle, that’s chill.”

“You’re such a dick.” Ryan giggles and smacks Shane with a throw pillow. “I’ll find the most outrageous Mexican restaurant. You’ll see.”

“First you have to win, honey.” Shane kisses the side of his neck and Ryan huffs softly. “I’ll see if I can find someone neutral to keep an eye on the gossip for us.”

“What about Sara?” Ryan puts his chin in his hand and looks down at Shane. “We’re friends. You’re friends. I trust her… She kind of deserves to know, don’t you think?”

Shane thinks for a moment and then nods.

“Alright. I’ll tell her tomorrow. She’ll probably be more excited about the bet, though.”

Ryan grins.

“I bet she will.”

 

-

 

Ryan has to hand it to Shane. Even though his boyfriend bet that people will catch on faster, he doesn’t overdo it in the least.

The first day after they decided on their scheme, he is gone for half the day. First to talk to Sara, then to work on a video. Ryan is busy editing, but he sometimes glances over to Shane’s empty desk, finding himself missing the other man already.

Daysha moves past their desks and catches him staring and Ryan flushes, quickly returning to his work. Out of the corner of his eyes, he sees her slow her steps and he feels nervousness bubble up in his stomach. Daysha doesn’t stop, though and Ryan feels himself breathe out in relief when she is out of sight.

Shane returns for lunch, just when Ryan is about to leave for it.

“Hey Ryan. I bought Thad Pai, wanna share?”

Ryan feels a smile spread over his face, his cheeks warm.

“Always!”

 

They sit together in the break room, chatting and laughing as usual and if Shane’s leg drifts and their knees end up pressed together, Ryan doesn’t pull his away, even when Steven Lim passes by the door and does a subtle double take before he’s gone again.

 

-

 

They spend their nights in their respective flats, so Ryan buys coffee on his way to work. He knows Shane rarely drinks the stuff at home, but appreciates a cup at work. When he arrives, he puts the coffee on Shane’s still empty desk and goes to work. Shane comes in twenty minutes later, when the office is still relatively quiet. Upon spotting the coffee, Ryan can see the other man’s eyes crinkle as he smiles and Ryan feels himself flush a bit when Shane runs his fingers over his back for just a moment as he passes Ryan’s chair. They don’t look at each other, but Shane later leans in to whisper that Curly caught his eye and winked at him after glancing between Ryan and Shane.

 

“What did you do?”

“I acted the innocent. It’s only Thursday.”

Ryan chuckles.

“Looks like people here gossip even more than I expected.”

“There is no shame in losing, babe.” Shane says quietly with a smug smile.

Ryan gives him a slight shove that causes Shane’s office chair to roll a bit.

“You haven’t one yet, Mister. We’re not the talk of the town or else Curly would have done _other_ gestures.”

Shane snorts and returns to his work.

 

-

 

They leave together, that night. So far, they each went home whenever they were done, sometimes returning to their own place before meeting. Tonight, Ryan is taking Shane home, so he hangs around while Shane finishes up an article. When he’s finally done, he packs his bag and Ryan idles nearby, waiting.

As they walk off together, Ryan can hear a slight “sst” behind him as one person tries to catch another person’s attention. He glances over his shoulder slightly and spots Andrew leaning closer to Quinta who has her eyes fixed on Ryan and Shane but waves for him intently to get closer.

Ryan doesn’t have to keep watching to see her cup a hand around her mouth to whisper to Andrew, but he does see that Shane noticed, because his boyfriend is trying to hold in a giggle.

 

-

 

Friday morning, they are both fashionably late, Shane’s hair is kind of mussed and Ryan is wearing a scarf, because he got too carried away the night before to tell Shane not to leave a hickey that high up. They both act too suspiciously not suspicious and Ryan knows it, but he is fine with losing the bet by now. Somehow, the jitters about other people knowing has melted away over the course of the week. Sure, the bet and the teasing is fun, but he also finds himself warming up to people seeing them not just as “Ryan and Shane, who work together and are friends” but also as “Ryan and Shane, who are a couple”. The thought makes him… happy. He should tell Shane. Just not now.

 

Ryan gets to work. He is reading interviews about a case he is preparing for Unsolved when suddenly, a hand grabs the scarf around his neck and yanks it off. Part of it gets caught and he is almost choked, but then it slips free and he hears a triumphant “A-hah!” before whirling around.

 

“What the _fuck_ Kelsey!”

Kelsey Darragh is holding up the scarf as if she is waving a flag and her red painted lips are parted in a wide grin.

“Who did you hang with last night, Bergara?” She asks, loud enough for the people in the immediate vicinity to lift their heads. Ryan sees Shane take off his headphones next to him.

When he doesn’t answer, Kelsey pushes further.

“Because from the look of _that_ I’d say it was either a vampire or a _very_ enthusiastic hook-up. Where’d you find them? I could use a good make out.”

“Jesus Christ, Kelsey.” Ryan rolls his eyes. He’s not really annoyed, but definitely a little stunned. “Give that back.” He holds out his hand for the scarf and has to snap his fingers twice until she finally concedes and hands it back.

“And for the record: I didn’t hang with a vampire. It also wasn’t a hook-up. Did you ever think about asking like a normal person?”

He is about to turn back to his desk when he sees her open his mouth. Ryan pauses. Kelsey pauses. A bunch of eyes are trained on them.

 

It’s interrupted by Kelsey’s phone buzzing and she glances at it, grimacing.

 

“This isn’t over, Bergara.” She says emphatically, pointing a finger at him. It turns into her flipping him off when all Ryan does is grin. “See you later, loverboy.”

When she turns and leaves, the people around them look after her before glancing back at Ryan. Ryan gives each and every one of them a withering look and sees with some satisfaction how most of them duck back behind their screens. Only Daysha holds his gaze, lifting her eyebrows at him in a challenging manner. She glances over and he follows her eyes, landing on Shane who seems to pretend like nothing happened. He is typing with one hand while sipping from his travel mug with the other. It’s _extremely_ casual and Ryan could laugh at it. Instead, he fights his smile and goes back to work, determined to not letting Daysha’s inspection distract him.

 

-

 

In the evening, when nearly everyone has said goodnight already, just before they get ready to leave, Shane places his phone on Ryan’s desk. His text conversation with Sara is open and Ryan quickly scans through the texts, face going pinker and pinker.

 

When Sara had promised to keep track of the gossip in the office, she clearly had declared it a project. It’s a little strange, reading detailed reports on what people assumed about him and Shane over the course of the week. Around Wednesday, half the people who were prone to gossip thought that they were at least fucking. The betting pool of “are they or aren’t they” was extended a day later, because people couldn’t decide that if they were together, if it was just sex or if they were dating. Steven Lim had shocked everyone by betting a 20 on the two of them being boyfriends since three weeks and according to Sara, most people had laughed at him. Ryan looks up at Shane and sees his boyfriend’s eyes twinkle.

“Spot on, Lim.” Shane sounds impressed and Ryan can only nod, feeling oddly amused.

He gets to the final messages. By now, there is barely anyone left who thinks the two have not at least had sex _once_. Most are convinced that it’s on the regular and about half of the people who submitted their bets think that they are dating. Ryan has to press a fist to his mouth to keep the giggles in and he assumes, Shane had his fair share of laughs while reading through the messages in private.

 

He quickly sends Sara a text on his own phone, thanking her for her service. Then, he looks at Shane.

 

“Well, I guess you did, in fact, win.”

Shane waggles his eyebrows.

“Can I get my prize this weekend? I want to take you on a proper date with dinner and a movie again.”

Before Ryan can answer, he hears a couple of disappointed groans and as he turns, half the office raises from behind their desks, one after the other like daisies popping up from a field. Ryan is so stunned he can only stare, but Shane has his back and turns Ryan’s chair with him in it so they can both face the eavesdroppers.

“What the hell!” Shane gives words to Ryan’s feeling and Ryan simply nods empathetically at the display.

They seem to ignore him in favor of kind of drifting together to hand over money. Ryan notices Steven’s smug smile as nearly half of it ends up in his hands.

“Excuse me!” Ryan finds his voice to interrupt the show. “As Shane has already put it: What the hell. Have you guys been spying on us?”

Everyone looks at each other. Then everyone looks at Kelsey. She merely shrugs.

 

“Told you it wasn’t over. I kinda knew you two were boning, but we all wanted to make sure. It’s payday, baby.” She holds up a small stack of banknotes and fans herself with it. It’s such a ridiculous display, Ryan can’t even be mad. He starts laughing. Next to him, Shane is giggling, too.

 

“Well. Now, that the cat is out of the bag,” Shane begins as he gets up, “I’ll take my boyfriend of _three weeks_ -”

More groans. More money being handed off to Steven who takes a small bow.

“-and we’re going to get dinner and hope you don’t follow us home, because you might see more than you bargained for.”

Ryan gasps in mock affront and smacks Shane’s shoulder, before taking his hand and getting up as well.

 

“Bye guys.” He calls over his shoulder as they’re walking out.

“Maybe dial back on the gossip next week, we got work, you know?”

 

Several people tell him to fuck off in a good-natured way and Shane giggles as he links his fingers with Ryan and squeezes his hand.

 

“Come on, loser. I’ll treat you to Chipotle. I’m a gracious winner.”

Ryan snorts.

“You’re a terrible winner. Look at you, all smug.”

Shane looks at him with a wide grin.

“Well, winning means that starting next week, I can hold your hand when I want to and don’t have to worry about it. That’s a reason to be smug, right? If you had won, I would have had to wait another week.”

“Shut up.” Ryan says softly, his cheeks turning pink. They step into the elevator and after the doors close, he pushes up on his tip toes to kiss Shane.

“I’m also glad you won.” He says softly and Shane seems to melt as he wraps Ryan in his arms.

 

They let go when the door opens, but their hands stay linked as they head for Ryan’s car in the parking lot.

As Shane had requested, nobody dares following them.


	28. "Last Night (Beer Fear)" inspired - College AU - Pining Ryan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> I don't know if you're accepting prompts but could you do a college au for either shyan or standrew (I love both so I'm not picky as to which one) based off the song 'last night' by Lucy Spraggan please?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Drunk Confessions, Pining! Ryan, Friends to Lovers, Alcohol, College AU  
> Ratings: T, Warning for excessive alcohol use, mentions of smoking weed, possibly implied underage drinking
> 
> Drink responsible kids! Also don’t drink and smoke, I have seen people do that and without fail, everyone got sick and had to lie down for a couple of hours, feeling miserable the next day. Just… have fun and be happy, don’t fucking ruin your night like that okay? :D

Ryan startles awake with a snort and immediately starts coughing. His mouth feels dry. Not just dry, it feels like it’s 2010 and he did the cinnamon challenge. There is not even a drop of moisture in there and he is pretty sure if he touched his tongue, it would crumble like sandstone. With a groan, he sits up and as expected, something stabs him straight in the head and the room starts spinning.

 

Bad. Bad bad bad.

 

For the fiftieth time this semester, Ryan promises to start drinking responsibly. He takes in his surroundings, relaxing when he recognizes them. It’s not his home, but it’s Zach, which is good. Ryan swings his legs off of the guestroom bed and looks around for his phone. It’s plugged in on the nightstand and he makes a mental note to buy Zach lunch as he unlocks it.

 

Ryan pulls up his legs and crosses them while he scrolls through the messages of last night. Ned is already awake and Ryan makes a face because it’s 9am on a Sunday and he is pretty sure the guy got up for a morning run. Ryan has interest in training, but not in the mornings, especially not after a party. Most of Ned’s messages are directed at Eugene and Ryan wishes he would do that in a private chat because it’s the same shit as always. Eugene got drunk and left, because that’s what he does. Ryan is used to it but some of the other guys still try to get him to change that habit.

 

The door opens and he looks up, spotting Zach in a t-shirt and pajama pants. His hair is plastered to his head and his glasses are askew.

 

“Mornin’. How are you feeling?”

Ryan sticks out his tongue as if trying to remove it from his head and mimes shooting himself with a gun.

“Still alive then, good.” Zach yawns and scratches his stomach. “There’s Mickie D’s downstairs. Painkillers, too. I’m gonna shower.”

Ryan nods and gets up, only swaying slightly. He finds his jeans and steps into them, positively surprised when he checks his wallet and finds more money than he expected. While he walks down the stairs he tries to remember if he got someone to pay for his drinks, but he draws a blank. All he remembers is vodka shots which left Keith shaking his head so hard that his mouth seemed all over the place. Then Eugene bailed at some point, Ned did a kegstand and-

 

 _Oh no_.

 

Ryan is already halfway through his fries and coke when he remembers something. He quickly scrolls down through his messages until he finds his conversation with Shane and opens it.

 

 _Shit. He saw it already_. Ryan was never less happy to see those two glowing checkmarks. 

His last message to Shane had been a video. It’s shaky, grainy and there is a lot of background noise. But Ryan still remembers that part because he was starting to sober up and he probably saw Keith make out with Becky or whatever and suddenly felt lonely and sad. Whatever it was, he remembers stumbling towards the backyard, close to one of the torches there and shooting a video for Shane. He groans and taps it.

 

Somewhere in the background, there is a bass pumping on and he can hear the constant chirping of crickets or maybe it’s the croaking of frogs, he’s not entirely sure. What he can hear clear is his own voice, only slurring a little bit, clearly not drunk out of his mind and his saddened expression.

 

“ _Shaaane. I know you’re an introvert n’ all but maaan, I wish you were here. I miss ya, man. I know I saw you earlier but- that’s not it. Not sure why but I feel like I’m dyin’. But not really so don’t be scared for me, okay?”_

 

On-screen Ryan starts laughing and it ends in half a sob and present-Ryan smacks himself in the face in embarrassment.

 

“ _Shane. If I die of loneliness tonight you gotta know that I love you, okay? I really do. Full on. Ready for commitment. Love you. So much.”_

 

The video cuts out and Ryan drops his phone on the table and scrambles for the bottle of pain meds that he hasn’t touched yet. His hangover has suddenly spiked. As he washes down two pills with the rest of his coke he screws his eyes shut but it doesn’t help against the picture his brain conjures up. Shane, his best friend since middle school, sitting at the breakfast table in his parents house with his headphones on, watching the video Ryan sent him. He would probably find it funny. Shane finds all of his antics funny, because Ryan is good at hiding which are serious and which are just jokes. Shane would probably try to hide a smile so his parents or brothers don’t ask what he’s watching.

 

Ryan tosses his paper cup in the trash and glares down at his phone as if it is somehow to blame.

 

“I have to find a way to stop drinking so much. I can’t keep doing this shit.”

 

Ryan was never good listening to his own advice.

 

-

 

He tosses another small rock but misses the window by a mile. Eugene behind him starts laughing again and Ryan turns around with a glare, which doesn’t shut him up. Ryan is drunk, but not a psycho, so he ignores the intrusive thought to pelt Eugene with the rocks and turns back to do another half-hearted try. He nearly falls over when it actually tings off the glass and he hears his friends behind him whisper something like “Oh shit” and throw themselves in the bushes.

 

Ryan stands on the back yard, swaying slightly and trying to keep his focus on the window. The tequila in his brain is holding a party because clearly, this is the best idea ever. Part of Ryan’s rational brain that hasn’t clocked out for the day is screeching in panic, but it clearly has no influence on his movements because Ryan stays put when the window above him is opened.

 

Shane sticks his head out, wearing only a rumpled shirt and boxers. His glasses are off and his hair looks like he’s been working on something that caused him to run his fingers through it over and over.

 

“…Ryan? What the hell?”

“Shane!” Ryan yells up, not quite loud enough to get the neighbors to yell back, but definitely loud enough to make Shane flinch. “Shane I gotta tell you something!”

Shane makes a face as he takes in Ryan’s state.

“Are you drunk? No, hang on, I don’t need to ask that. You’re drunk! It’s Wednesday!”

Ryan waves his hands through the air because Shane is talking and while he likes to hear Shane talk, it’s not what he needs right now.

“Shhhhhhhhhh! Shuuusshhh, Shane! Shhushhane!” He giggles because that’s a fantastic joke. Ryan doesn’t get why Shane isn’t laughing. His friend looks annoyed. Maybe a bit worried. Probably for a good reason.

 

“Listen, Shane!” Ryan calls a little more collected. “I came to tell you something!”

“Are you sure this is the time and place?” Shane asks, but his voice is a little softer. Ryan ignores the question.

“I need you!” He calls up. “Not just like- lemme up and let’s fuck. Although I’d be up for that if you are! Just– like-. Urgh.” He bends over and tries to get his brain and stomach in check. After a deep breath, he feels a bit better. Ryan stands back up straight and looks at Shane.

 

“I need you in my life, Shane. God- You have no fucking _idea_ what you do to me-” He breaks off into a sob, heaves and tries to keep it all in, but then he feels a whine work its way out of his throat and he sobs again, burying his face in his hands. “I love you, you asshole!” He yells into his own hands. “Fucker, why do you do this to me? I just- Shit. _Fuck.”_

 

He turns on his heel and starts running. Behind him, a bunch of people burst out of the bushes and run after him, shouting and yelling. Somehow, Ryan still can hear Shane call his name behind him. He doesn’t stop or turn around.

 

-

 

Ryan avoids Shane for a couple of days, feeling too bad about Wednesday night. It was worse than the video, but this time he at least has his friends to blame. They probably set him up to it. Ryan doesn’t remember if they did. He remembers salt, tequila and lime and maybe some smoking. He had been miserable the next morning and skipped _all_ of his Thursday classes. He also officially swore to never touch tequila again. Ryan was serious this time. He texted his parents _and_ his uncles to never let him touch tequila again. One of his uncles just answered with:

 

“Everyone reaches that day. Congratulations, boy.”

 

Ryan wishes he could laugh about it.

 

-

 

“Ryan, you really should come back inside!”

 

Ryan is a true coward. He doesn’t want to talk to Shane about what happened on Wednesday night, so once he heard that Shane was going to join Curly’s TGIF party, he threw himself at the next alcoholic drink and it turned out to be sambuca. Way too many shots and three times as many coffee beans later, he is dancing outside the apartment building, because inside it’s too full and too hot and Shane was looking for him, at least Jen had told him so. Ryan had to run and now he’s twirling outside and of course Shane followed him and tries to get him to go back inside.

 

He really can’t. If he’s inside, he doesn’t really have anywhere to run and if he doesn’t run when he’s drunk and Shane is around, he might do something really stupid. Maybe he should just get Shane to leave. If Shane stopped being his friend then Ryan wouldn’t end up in these situations where all he wants to do is hold him and kiss him and do all sorts of things you shouldn’t want to do to your straight best friend.

 

When Shane is about to grab his wrist, Ryan jumps back.

“Don’t touch me! Y-you… loser!” He tries to glare at Shane but going by the completely confused expression, he doesn’t manage.

“Ryan you’re really close to the street, I’m not leaving till you go back inside.”

“Listen!” Ryan throws out his arms and takes a step back. “Why don’t you get the message-” He backs off further, “do me a solid,” and further, “do me a favor, even-”

Ryan’s foot slips and he falls backwards, realizing too late that the pavement ended. Before he can fall and land on the street, however, Shane has grabbed his wild flailing arm and pulled him back on his feet. Ryan sways for a moment and stares right into Shane’s face and his friend is _really_ close and he looks worried and angry and Ryan doesn’t want him to look like that.

“Sorry,” he mutters as he drops forward and puts his head on Shane’s chest. Shane sighs.

“It’s okay, little guy…”

 

-

 

Ryan wakes up in the same bed as four of his drinking buddies. They are all clothed, thankfully, so at least some of his dignity is intact. For now.

 

His hangover also isn’t as bad as usual, which tells him they probably had brandy. Ned tells him that was exactly it, but everyone around him is slightly weird. He tries to understand what they are getting at, with their looks and their snickers and everything else. One by one, he has to catch his friends alone and innocently ask for details about last night. As he slowly and carefully reconstructs everything, Ryan gets more and more mortified. And it’s even worse. He starts to _remember_ bits and pieces.

 

Shane had a brandy and soda with him and Ryan had not been very drunk. He had laughed and joked and leaned his head on Shane’s shoulder. When he had his second brandy, still not nearly drunk enough to explain the whole thing, he had grabbed Shane’s hand and dragged him outside. He distinctly recalls they they had stood under a tree and Ryan… Ryan had said-

 

_Oh God in Heaven why._

 

“Marry me!”

Shane pauses and blinks and stares at him.

“I’m sorry… what was that?”

He is laughing, it’s audible in the words he’s saying and his smile is wide and there are sweet little crinkles around his eyes and Ryan wants to kiss all over his stupid face.

“I mean it.” He says, suddenly breathless. “I can’t imagine my life without you. I love you. We should get married! Right now!”

Shane laughs, loud and with his head thrown back.

“Ryan this isn’t Vegas! Even if you were sober, we couldn’t just get married around the corner.”

Ryan grabs his hand.

“Promise me. Promise me you’ll marry me.”

Shane very carefully pulls his hand away.

“Maybe if you propose to me the right way, little guy. I’m not the best horse in the stable but I’m not cheap either.”

He had winked at a very confused Ryan and walked back inside.

 

_Okay. Well. Not too terrible. I can just say that I didn’t mean it. Or pretend it never happened._

 

Then he asks Eugene.

Sadly, Eugene always remembers what happened.

 

“So you came back inside and looked miserable so I grabbed my tie and a bottle of wine and dragged you out on the porch and we had Rosé. It was a good one.”

Ryan stares past Eugene’s shoulder at the coffee maker. He somehow doesn’t want to know anymore.

“Then I go to grab a new bottle and when I come back, you’re gone. So I looked for you and I pass Kelsey – Darragh – and she told me you asked her if she wore rings, but she didn’t. So you asked her if you could have her hairband and apparently she gave it to you. Imagine my surprise when I walk in the living room and you’re down on one knee-”

“Eugene-”

“In front of _everybody_ -”

“Eugene please stop-”

“Holding the hand of a very confused Shane Madej-”  
Ryan puts his head in his hands and whimpers.

“You asked him if he would marry you. And then you put the hairband on his finger. I think the wrong one at that.”

“Oh fuck me. It’s over. I have to move to Australia or something.”

Eugene pats him on the back.

 

“Chill. Shane didn’t say _no_.”

“Did he say _yes_?!”

“I… don’t think so.”

“Fuck.”

 

-

 

“Ryan why did you have so much Bailey’s? You’re supposed to enjoy the stuff. Slowly. Not chug it.”

Ryan doesn’t answer because Shane helps him up the stairs of Shane’s house and Ryan is sure that if he were to answer he would probably wake everyone else. He nearly falls over as they enter Shane’s room, but Shane catches him.

“Hey.” He says as Shane sits him down on the bed.

“Hey.” Shane says, smiling a bit.

“You’re really hot, do you know that?”

Ryan keeps rambling as Shane removes his shoes and socks and helps him out of his pants.

“I would totally shack up with you if you’re into it.”

Shane laughs as he hands Ryan a pillow.

“I’m flattered, but we’re not fucking tonight.”

Ryan pushes his bottom lip out.

“Why not?”

“Because you keep telling me that you’re in love with me and want to marry me and need me. So if we actually end up doing this I want you to be sober and I want you to remember it.”

Ryan has no answer to that. He lets Shane help him lie down and allows him to put a blanket over him.

“And also I don’t have condoms.” Shane adds. It sounds like a joke.

“Eh. I’d be fine with having your babies. I kind of want to have your babies.” Ryan mutters in the pillow he’s holding without really thinking about what the hell he’s saying.

He barely hears the confused but affectionate: “What the actual fuck, Ryan.” But he giggles anyway.

 

A hand brushes through his hair and he melts into the bed, surrounded by Shane’s smell and then he feels Shane stretch out next to him and hears him exhale.

“Good night, Ryan. Sleep now.”

“Okay…”

 

-

 

Shane doesn’t address what happened when they have breakfast the next morning and Ryan decides to be a cowardly loser and doesn’t either. They have waffles and Shane’s mum is flattered when Ryan pretty much sings praises on her cooking and they take their bikes to the park and sit by the pond, shooting the shit and Ryan can’t tell Shane what he feels because he is sober and when he’s sober he is too scared.

 

-

 

Maybe it was a dumb idea.

No.

It _definitely_ was a dumb idea.

 

Ryan distinctly remembers leaving with Eugene this time when Eugene wandered off. He was impressed. In true Eugene manner, he made four new friends – three very hot girl and a super nice dude – within minutes and they all buy a bottle of rum together and wander around the streets, their treasure stashed in a paper bag. They end up in the park, still sober enough to climb the fence and they lie in the grass and sing stupid songs and tell stories and Ryan sobs against the shoulder of one of the girls and tells her about his best friend he’s in love with but that he can never tell him because the dude is most likely straight and yes he has mentioned them sleeping together what about that makes him not _clearly straight_?

 

Eugene produces another bottle and it’s not until Ryan sips from it that he notices they switched to whiskey. He knows his own tolerance, so despite being buzzed and emotionally exhausted, he knows that if he drinks the stuff he will do something _really dumb._

 

So he drinks and then he makes out with the girl he poured his heart out to. It’s nice, having something uncomplicated. He could almost imagine getting over Shane in a night like this. Then a set of flashlights go on and hit him, Eugene and their friendly strangers and all of them scramble to their feet and run for their fucking lives.

 

-

 

The police station smells of vomit and the lights are hurting Ryan’s eyes. He’s sitting on a steel bench, hands in his lap and he feels kind of … dumb.

The cops frisked him, turned all his pockets inside out but he luckily didn’t have weed or anything else on him that could get him in real trouble. Ryan thinks about the trouble his parents will get him into, however and already regrets everything.

Eugene has vanished for a couple of minutes, because he managed to get one of the cops to allow him to make a phone call. Ryan wonders if Eugene has a lawyer. Probably not, but he would expect anything from the guy.

 

The parents of their “friends” show up and take them away. Eugene kicks his legs next to him and Ryan feels glad that he is still there with him. When the door of their room is opened, he looks up, anxious if his mom or his dad are gonna get really disappointed first. Instead, Shane and his brother come in and Eugene gets up.

 

“Oh I knew calling you was the best decision.”

“Your parents are _really_ pissed Eugene.” Shane says instead of a greeting, but he claps him on the shoulder anyways. Eugene walks out with Shane’s brother and Ryan looks after them for a moment and before he can even focus, Shane is sitting in front of him.

“How are you holding up, little guy?”

“Uh.” Ryan can’t meet Shane’s eyes. “I’m okay. I guess. Just… scared because I fucked up and my parents are really gonna be mad this time.”

“They’re worried about you.” Shane mutters. Ryan finally looks at him and he just catches him say: “ _I’m_ worried about you.”

 

Ryan swallows.

“I’m sorry. I wish… I wish I knew how to just go to a party and like… have a last shot. Don’t say stupid shit to you and make you uncomfortable. Go home and wake up in my own bed.”

He feels stupidly sober right now and he has to bury his face in his hands to stop himself from locking up, because he knows that if he looks at Shane, he’ll fall silent or just make dumb jokes.

“I really wanna do that. I just don’t know how.”

He drops his hands and looks at Shane, laughing slightly.

“Man. I’m a real fucking mess, ain’t I. At least I get some sweet new bracelets from somewhere.”

He holds up his wrists to Shane’s face and then frowns when he realizes what they are.

“Ah. Whoops.”

Shane shakes his head. He looks a bit tired.

“I’ll get an officer to take them off. And then I’ll drive you home.”

“Okay.”

 

Ryan feels suddenly very small.

 

-

 

He spends the weekend at his parents house. They are not thrilled about the fact that the police called them at four in the morning because their eldest son was caught trespassing and drinking. Ryan takes the lecture they give him without complaint. He nods and promises to do better. Then he cries a little. It’s not for the show, normally he would rather die than cry in front of his parents. But when he ends up wrapped in a double hug, sobbing about him ruining his friendship with Shane, he still appreciates it.

 

Ryan spends the weekend helping his parents around the house. He works in the garden, mostly, because he has no idea how to help his mom in the kitchen. On Saturday night, his dad invites him to a game of beer pong. Ryan wants to decline, but is Dad fills the cup only a quarter and tells him not to lose. Ryan loses, but not on purpose. He decides to be a bad sport and not empty all the cups he should. His dad ruffles his hair and Ryan feels a bit better.

 

He sends Shane a text that night. It takes him about three hours to compose it and it ends up to be rather long. In it, Ryan apologizes for all the stupid stuff he did and that he didn’t mean to cause Shane any embarrassment. He promises to do better.

 

The lines about his fear that he messed everything up don’t stay in the final cut. Ryan can’t address it yet.

 

-

 

The next week goes alright. He almost caves and goes on a Thursday party but Eugene of all people reminds him of what he promised and Ryan instantly turns and goes home. He is very, very grateful.

 

-

 

Friday, Curly throws another party. Ryan allows himself to go there but he takes a couple of friends. He hasn’t seen Shane since the police station and he really, truly wishes he could have found the courage to visit him. But the fear that everything they ever had was over and ruined now is too great.

 

However, half an hour into the party – Ryan is still nursing his first beer and it’s kind of weird – Shane shows up, more or less dragged along by a couple of his friends. Ryan runs into him in the kitchen and his eyes go wide. Shane seems surprised to see him, but then smiles.

 

“Hey. How are you doing?”

“Uh.” Ryan realizes that he has to learn how to converse at parties again while not being drunk. How did he ever do that without alcohol? He knows he has done it before. “Good. I guess. I had a weird week.”

“Wanna tell me about it?”

“Sure.” Ryan looks around at the other people who are eating and drinking and conversing. “Maybe not here, though?”

Shane nods, understanding and he takes Ryan’s wrist and pulls him along. Ryan follows, heart beating too fast and too hard, but he feels oddly happy.

 

They end up hunkering down in a wide cupboard in the upstairs bathroom. Each of them sits on a folded towel and they only have to duck their heads a little to hide in there. Well. Ryan has to duck a little. Shane is folded up, but he doesn’t seem to mind.

Shane toast to him with his own beer and Ryan takes a sip, breathes in and out deeply and starts talking.

 

Shane’s eyes are focused on him and Ryan feels exposed in the light of one of their phones while talking about his crisis, about how he was afraid that he wouldn’t be able to stop drinking at a party. Nightmare about day drinking and ending up with an addiction. The worries of disappointing his parents. And finally…

 

“I’m sorry. I know I sent you that message but I wanted to tell you in person. I guess I drank so much because it made me brave. Lowered my inhibitions, I guess.”

He sighs and looks at Shane. His friend is kind of pretty in the soft orange light that comes from his phone screen. Shane is still looking at Ryan and he doesn’t seem disgusted or angry and annoyed.

 

“You went through all that and all these decisions within a week? That’s a lot.”

Ryan shrugs.

“I just realized I couldn’t go on like that anymore. Nothing wrong with parties or the occasional drink. But… I guess I wanted to remember the parties I went to. Then again, I didn’t want to remember the things I told you because then I’d have to face them.”

 

Shane leans back, but he doesn’t get far before he bangs his head on the ceiling. Ryan starts to giggle and he is still giggling while Shane grumbles about no proper privacy spot with actual room and he still feels giggly when they climb out of the cupboard and Shane pulls him outside. They deposit of their cans but Ryan doesn’t feel like grabbing another drink just yet. Instead, he takes both of Shane’s hands and walks backwards until they end up at the front gate, a safe distance between them and the street.

“Shane…” He begins, not wanting to let go of his hands. “I know it all sounded like bullshit and drunken ramblings but… I do lov- like you very much. And I know that’s kinda shitty because we’re friends and you’re straight and even then you kind of deserve a confession that isn’t a drunken video.” Ryan sighs and bites his bottom lip. “So I guess this is it. I like you very much and I would absolutely be up for make outs and all the other stuff, even marriage and kids – well, adopted ones – and I know that’s pretty weird. I guess I’m weird.”

 

Ryan slowly lifts his head and looks at Shane and Shane is slightly shaking his head.

“Okay. First: Thank you very much, I liked this version of “Ryan tells me he’s into me at a party” the best. Second: You’re an idiot because I don’t know why you think that but I’m _definitely_ not straight. And third: I am very much into you, too.”

Ryan blinks. He is sure he only had one beer, he also didn’t smoke anything. There is no reason for him to be hallucinating.

 

“I’m- I’m sorry?”

Shane holds up his hand. On his left ring finger, very neatly and relatively snug, sits a hairband that seems strangely familiar to Ryan.

“I’m not cheap, as I said. But I appreciate a proper gesture. Let’s see it as a promise ring, okay? I can take it off after we banged it out.”

Ryan blinks. His brain finally caught up.

 

“Does that mean I can… like… actually kiss you?”  
“It would be appreciated, yes.”

 

Parties can be really cool. Drinking can also be fun. The best, however, Ryan decides, is when you remember all of it the next day and can enjoy the memory. A memory that is even better when you recall it after waking up in the bed of your best friend who is _definitely_ not straight and he snuggles up to you and plants a kiss on your naked back.


	29. Ryan Angst without MCD

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anonymous asked:
> 
> All the Ryan angst pls but happy ending no death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Amnesia, Established Relationship, Angst with a Happy Ending, mentions of car accidents  
> Rating: T
> 
> Notes: I’m SURE that’s not how selective Amnesia or any type of memory loss works but allow me to write it like this just for the sake of the angst, plz.

Ryan wakes in a bed that isn’t his with a headache. Before he can think about parties, hangovers and bad decisions however, he takes in the sterile air, the humming machine to his left and the IV in his arm. He can’t remember falling asleep in a hospital so waking up in one is kind of jarring. He wants to speak, but his mouth is so dry that all he can do is cough.

“Ryan! Oh thank goodness!”

He cranes his head and then his mother leans over him, touching his forehead tenderly. She looks shaken up, eyes reddened and her lip is wobbling. Ryan gives her a grin as bright he can muster, even though his head aches. Next to his mum, his father moves into view.

“What happened?” He manages, throat still scratchy and dry.

His mom still pets his head and he reaches up, fingers brushing against thick bandages.

“You had a car accident, Ryan.” His father says softly. Someone hit you at an intersection. You were unconscious for more than thirty hours.“

Holy shit. Ryan blinks.

"Shane’s waiting outside.” His mom adds. She looks across Ryan’s bed and he sees his brother sitting on his other side, patting his knee.

“I’ll get him.” Jake says and gets up and out the door.

Ryan frowns.

“Why is Shane here?” He asks. “Only family and next of kin, right?”

“Right.” His father agrees, looking slightly confused. Ryan’s parents exchange a look and his mom continues:

“Shane called us right after he knew what hospital they were taking you. He was so worried.”

“Why did Shane know?” Ryan’s mind is trying to make sense of it all. “Was he in the car with me?”

“No, sweetie. He was waiting for you at home.” His mother is smiling softly and Ryan is even more confused. At home? Whose home? His or Shane’s? Then again why would Shane wait for him at Ryan’s place? The big guy didn’t even have a key.

Before he can ask, however, the door opens and Jake returns, followed by Shane.

Ryan knows it’s not nice thinking that, but his friend looks like _shit_. He’s disheveled and has deep, dark bags under his eyes as if he hasn’t slept in days. His eyes, now that he’s coming closer are red rimmed as well and Ryan feels a sense of fear. How bad had he been for Shane to worry himself to tears? Again, he can’t ask because Shane breathes out and walks over.

“Hey, baby. Glad to see you up and awake again.”

Ryan makes a face and grumbles “Don’t call me baby, man, that’s weird.” right when Shane _leans in and kisses him on the forehead._

He flinches back because _what the fuck_ and sees the surprise and… hurt in Shane’s face. Ryan blinks at him in confusion.

“Ryan?” Shane’s voice is unsure, worried and then Ryan’s father takes him by the arm and turns him away and starts speaking very quietly to him.

 

Ryan drifts in and out of unconsciousness. Once he finally can rest his head on the pillow without pain and without being pumped full of pain medication, a doctor speaks to him. She says a lot of words that Ryan doesn’t have the description to, but the basic meaning becomes clear:

 

Selective Amnesia.

 

Ryan was missing _a whole year_. He lies down and stares at the ceiling, trying to understand. An entire year of friends and family and doing Unsolved, gone. On top of that, according to his parents – because Shane was too shocked to do it – a year in which he found new love in old friends.

 

 _Shane and I got together?_ He thinks, completely confused. He doesn’t understand. As far as he remembers, he has only ever dated women. Sure, there were men he knew were attractive but he never really felt _attracted_ himself. He wants to ask Shane. About everything: How did they get together? Was it a desperate confession? Did they go on many dates? How long until they moved in together?

But Ryan is scared because he is someone who gets scared. He saw Shane’s face after brushing off the forehead kiss and his heart sinks.

_Shane has been dating me for almost a year. Our anniversary must be coming up, soon and instead of a loving boyfriend, he has a guy who jerks back when you want to kiss him._

Ryan swallows. He’s still uncomfortable with the idea, but the thought of Shane being rejected and left alone and pushed away by the person he loves… hurts. Ryan is pretty sure it’s not an after-effect of dating Shane before he lost his memories. Shane is his friend, he cares about him, so of course, he wants Shane to be happy.

 

It’s not easy.

 

Ryan catches the doctor telling Shane to try and keep things slow. She suggested that Shane would introduce Ryan into new things whenever Ryan hit a wall or found something new. She also tells him not to rush it and Ryan’s heart hurts strangely when Shane _swears_ he will never push Ryan.

 

He stares at the ceiling again.

 

Could he love Shane? If he’s honest, he doesn’t know. He very much would like it for all his memories to come back and fill him in, but he just lies there, having to remind himself that both True Crime and Supernatural seasons 4 are over and that a new season is coming up soon – except they postponed it because of Ryan being ill. So somewhere over the course of the last year, he and Shane got together. He wants to ask, but the pained look in Shane’s eyes keeps him from it.

 

At first.

 

-

 

Ryan is released and Shane takes him home. Home, meaning their shared space and Ryan looks around a home that feels vaguely familiar and is filled about half with his stuff and half with Shane’s. Shane has been so careful, he has picked up Ryan from the hospital and chit-chatted about everything and nothing. Ryan thinks about what it must feel like if your partner doesn’t recognize you as such.

 

Shane leaves him the bed. They only have one, of course.

“I can take the couch, it’s no big deal. We made sure I can stretch out on it when we bought it and you said-” He blinks and breaks off. “Nevermind.”

“What did I say?”

Shane swallows and looks away.

“You said you’d only ever ban me to it if I mocked your ghost theories in bed.”

Ryan’s stomach drops. It sounds like something he would say, if he and Shane really slept in the same bed on the regular. He starts twisting the corner of his shirt in his fists.

“You can sleep here, I don’t mind. I’m not weirded out by it or anything.”

Shane still doesn’t look at him when he sighs and shakes his head.

“It’s better if I don’t. We usually… we _used to_ cuddle a lot and I don’t want to latch onto you while asleep and freak you out. To be honest, it would feel pretty bad in general, you know.”

He makes a vague gesture towards Ryan as if he wants to initiate casual touch but can’t. Ryan nods. Maybe he should go to a hotel room for a while. Or visit his parents. But that feels even worse than hanging with Shane so he doesn’t.

 

Ryan takes the bed, Shane takes the couch. Ryan stares at the ceiling and despite the sleep enhancing medication the hospital gave him, he’s up for a long time, wondering how and why he would forget anything this huge in his life.

 

-

 

He can’t keep quiet forever.

 

“Shane.” He says one night when Shane makes sure Ryan took his meds before lying down. “I’m… I know I can’t control it. But I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I’m causing you pain.”

 

He means it, every word. Shane is still so important to him and the idea of hurting him like that is so incredibly painful, especially when Shane smiles at him. Soft and kind and understanding.

 

“I know, babe.” Shane swallows and looks away when he catches himself using the pet name. “Sorry. I know, _Ryan_. I really know. It’s not your fault, okay? Just focus on recovering. If you don’t remember the year I’ll fill you in on Unsolved and everything around us- I mean, around you… And then I’ll leave you to it, okay? I promise.”

Ryan bites his bottom lip but doesn’t answer.

 

-

 

“What was our first kiss like?” Ryan asks while they are watching the episodes of Unsolved he doesn’t remember planning, writing, shooting or editing. Shane flinches next to him and Ryan feels terrible.

“You don’t have to-” He starts, but Shane shakes his head.

“It’s fine.” He huffs a sigh and stares ahead as he pauses the video. Finally he shifts to look at Ryan and it’s strange and exposing to be looked at like that by Shane, to be looked at like he is the most amazing person Shane has ever met and Ryan’s head hurts. This is dumb. He’s not in love with Shane but he should be. He fell in love with this man some time around the year and he can’t _remember_ it or feel it. It hurts him because it feels like Ryan has lost something that was very precious and dear, but he can’t remember for the love of God _where_ and _how_ and _what_.

 

Shane finally starts to speak.

 

“I had feelings for you for a while. You could get a bit… “no-homo” sometimes so I didn’t tell you, I thought you would freak out. I like being around you in any way you prefer… and preferred.” Ryan sees Shane’s throat bob as he swallows and he wants to hug the other man to calm him down, but he knows it would make everything even worse.

 

“So I didn’t tell you. I didn’t tell you for months.” Shane stares ahead, eyes empty and it breaks Ryan’s heart. He doesn’t understand his feelings. Part of him – he’s pretty sure about that one – sees a friend in terrible agony and experiencing heartbreak and he wants to help. But he knows he can’t because _he is the cause of that heartbreak_ and the situation feels so unfair he could scream. He never wanted to cause his friends pain, especially not Shane who is always funny, always kind, always chill, always positive…

Ryan wants to cry. For him, for Shane, for what they had and what he lost. Instead he reaches out and hovers with his hand over Shane’s for a moment or two. Shane looks over at him and Ryan can see the twinge of hope under the pain before it gets swallowed up by desperation and drowned in sadness. He finally touches Shane’s hand and it feels familiar but not, new but like he did it a hundred times before.

 

Finally, Shane continues.

“We came back from location… I think we were both really tired, didn’t get much sleep, you know.” He shoots Ryan a smile and Ryan can’t help it, he laughs a little. Ryan rarely sleeps on location and he often keeps Shane awake as well. “I suggested we meet up for a movie and have some popcorn to wind down so you could get your much needed sleep.” Shane suddenly looks guilty and Ryan thinks about how weird this must be, telling your partner that you worried about their health and feeling bad about it. Again, Ryan feels like he should touch Shane, maybe hug him, but at the same time it would feel like torture to Shane, he’s sure, so he doesn’t.

“And then…” Shane’s voice drops in volume and he looks like he’s far, far away, swallowing and closing his eyes. “While we were watching the movie, there was kind of a lull. I don’t remember what we were watching but it wasn’t very interesting. I made some joke about the main character and we laughed and I looked over at you and you were suddenly really close, leaned all the way in so we were pressed together and then you kissed me.” Shane opens his eyes again, still with the faraway look in his eyes as if he is staring right in the eyes of past-Ryan who didn’t have a fucked up head and knew that he loved Shane. He starts to smile softly and Ryan’s stomach twists. “You told me you liked me and that you couldn’t take it anymore… So, of course, instead of just kissing you I made you tell me three times that you were absolutely sure and that you meant it and knew what you were doing.”

Shane looks up, guiltily and Ryan wishes, prays that he could feel the urge to kiss this man and soothe the pain on his face. It doesn’t come.

 

 _How much time did I really lose?_ He wonders. If he had been in love with Shane for a while before confessing, he must have carried it as a secret for a while. How come his current brain doesn’t hold that secret?

 

 _Maybe it’s because I spilled it already._ Ryan muses with a sigh. They both stare at the frozen image of themselves on the Unsolved set. Shane has made a joke and Ryan is laughing and grinning widely, eyes bright and trained on the other man and he looks like he is absolutely elated to be around him.

 

Ryan buries his head in his hands and digs his fingertips in his skull as if he could somehow reach in there and pull out all that he needed to _understand_.

 

-

 

“Did we tell other’s? HR? Friends? Family? The fans?”

Shane smiles his sad little smile at him and Ryan wants to rip his own tongue out.

“Yeah. All of them. One after the other. Everyone was so happy for us, people sometimes said they had waited for us to get there. Your mom cried, my dad cried… they were so happy for us.” He blinks as he realizes he’s repeating himself.

Shane reaches out for Ryan’s hand before he stops himself. Ryan slowly brings up his hand until their fingers brush. There is no lightning spark as he hoped, but Shane takes his hand nonetheless and it feels… alright. Not as weird as Ryan expected. It’s comfortable and he can live with that.

 

-

 

Sometimes, Ryan dreams of things that might have happened. Shane and him in a movie theater, holding hands and laughing at whatever happened on screen. Coming home to a new flat that is already warmed and prepared and lived in. Shane cooking for him. Their families inviting them for Christmas.

 

Ryan knows that their anniversary must come up soon but Shane keeps taking care of him, giving him space, leaving _their_ bedroom to sleep on the couch because he doesn’t want to make Ryan uncomfortable. Ryan, meanwhile, just wants to understand. He wants to love this man, but he can’t force himself to do it, because whenever he looks at their pictures together he thinks “wrong wrong wrong wrong”, over and over until Shane catches him spacing out and distracts him.

 

One night, he thinks about the story of their first kiss and looks at the instagram they made to let their followers know that they were together. He laughs as on-screen Shane and Ryan talk about how neither of them are ready or know what they are doing and Ryan finds it somewhat helpful. Past-Ryan didn’t know what to do either and he figured it out. Ryan can figure it out again, right?

 

_Right?_

 

-

 

His own instagram has a bunch of sports events on it and Ryan watches reruns of the games. Sometimes he has a sense of déjà-vu, knows if the player will score or not right before they do; once he has a spectacular moment of flinching right before the batter loses grip of the bat and flings it across the field. He hears the crowd react and has a vague memory of his brother bringing his hands to his mouth in shock while the people around him gasp.

 

Nobody got hurt, but it was still a powerful swing and the bat had nearly landed in the lower ranks.

 

Ryan blinks at the screen, the incident already forgotten and the players back in game. Something tingles in the back of his head.

 

-

 

He visits his family for a couple of days. Shane sees him off and makes sure he has packed everything, including his new medication. Ryan looks up at the face that’s so fucking familiar but also not because he’s not used standing so close or seeing Shane lean down as if he wants to kiss Ryan’s forehead and Shane’s expression is still pained. It’s part of his face by now, smoothed out and barely covered by forced neutrality or slight smiles.

 

Ryan moves without thinking and brings his arms up to wrap them around Shane’s shoulders, pulling the other man into a hug. Shane only stiffens for a second before he hugs Ryan around the waist. It’s not especially tight or desperate but Shane tucks his face against Ryan’s shoulder as if hiding. Ryan is surprised how comfortable he feels.

 

-

 

His parents fill him in on everything else that happened over the last year. Little differences in their relatives’ lives, what little nonsense the dogs did (and what their Halloween costumes had been). Ryan’s dad plays beer pong with him like he sometimes did when Ryan was still in college. His mum makes his favorite for dinner and he sits out on the porch with Jake and drinks a beer, asking about when he told him about Shane.

 

“You texted me a couple days after you got together. You had a minor freak out because you were going out on your first date and didn’t know what you wear on a date with a dude.”

Ryan snorts into his beer even though his cheeks heat up. It sounds like him.

“Why the fuck would I text _you_ of all people? You don’t know that shit either.”

Jake gives a wide shrug that conveys the phrase _Fuck if I know_ but he’s laughing.

“I figured you wear something nice on a date, no matter what gender and I told you to chill out and ask your queer friends and you texted back and told me you don’t trust them with your wardrobe and then you were quiet for like ten minutes before just sending me a thumbs up emoji and that was that.”

Ryan hums and goes through his phone. He finds a picture of him and Shane, seated at a booth in a restaurant. They both look very nice. Ryan is wearing a black shirt that shows off his bicep and he knows he picked that on purpose to look good for Shane. A little tingle coils in his stomach and he feels his cheeks warm.

 

“I hope the date went well.”

Jake looks at him, a little pitying.

“Well I sure hope so because four months later you lived together.”

“Wow, we sure moved fast...” Ryan mutters, still looking at the picture.

Jake reaches out and puts a hand on his back.

“You said something about making up for lost time.”

 

Ryan holds his head and tries to take deep breaths.

 

_Making up for lost time. That’s a fucking laugh, huh._

 

-

 

Three days into the week of hanging with his parents, Ryan has a dream. He knows it’s a dream because it’s so non-linear it makes his urge to organize _everything_ flare up. It’s not even a lucid dream, because he can’t change anything.

 

It’s like he’s watching a movie on a jumping, cut and re-cut and taped together film roll that keeps skipping over some moments and lingers on others.

 

Ryan in a winter coat freezing his ass off and Shane reaching out and wrapping him in a warm hug, laughing at Ryan’s muffled protests when he calls him a sun-starved lily of the valley.

 

Shane across from him at a candlelit dinner table, looking so smitten and happy that Ryan could throw himself over the table and kiss the living daylights out of him.

 

Both on the set of Unsolved giggling about something with the firm reminder in the back of Ryan’s head that it’s almost three months and that Shane is taking him to the movies later.

 

A fuzzy memory of Shane’s mouth on his shoulder and a lot of warmth and a lot of naked skin and Ryan isn’t freaking out in the least, he actually finds himself craving more.

 

Curled up on the couch with his laptop, working on a project from home and ordering food online since Shane will be home soon, jumping off the couch as soon as he hears the keys jangle because, fuck, he missed the big guy.

 

Ryan taking a specific date off a month in advance because he has plans, he only needs to pick up the gift first-

 

-

 

He shoots up in bed, head pounding but the shock in his system doesn’t come from that.

 

 _Shit_ . He remembers what he forgot. Not _everything_ but the basics and one spectacularly important detail that gets him to jump out of bed at six in the morning and scramble to get his clothes.

 

When he runs downstairs his parents are already up, looking at him startled because Ryan hasn’t been up this early under this roof for about ten years.

 

“I remember now. Fuck!” He rarely cusses in front of his parents but they don’t seem to care right now. “I need to go back. I need to see Shane-”

He scrambles for his keys while also trying to put on his jacket and his shoes, all at the same time and he immediately drops the keys while fumbling and curses again.

 

Jake pops into his periphery and picks up the keys.

 

“You don’t look fit to drive, man. I’ll take you. We can pick your stuff up later, come on.”

 

Ryan is so relieved he could cry but there is no time for that. He rushes to give his parents each a tight hug before he runs after Jake who’s already in the car.

The whole ride home Ryan is fretting but Jake won’t go any faster because: “The last time you rushed to get to the guy, you ended up in this mess so sit still and fucking wait.”

 

He does. He tries at least.

 

-

 

They take one detour at Ryan’s request before they reach the apartment. Ryan is about to list all the things he is grateful for when it comes to Jake but his brother just kicks him out of the car and says they can talk later and Ryan runs up all four floors to their space, not even bothering with the lift. He digs out his keys and, yeah he does remember which one it is because he _never fucking grabs it on the first go goddamn it_ and then he throws open the door so hard that it slams against the wall next to it and he stands in the hall, huffing for breath.

 

He can see Shane sit in their small kitchen, laptop open and probably working on something but his head flies up when he hears the noise.

 

“Ryan.” He seems surprised, eyes comically wide but then the old familiar worry settles on his features. “Are you alright? Did something happen?” He gets up. “I thought you wouldn’t be home before-”

That is all he gets to say because Ryan has finally made his way over to him and grabbed him by the lapels to pull him into a kiss.

 

 _Oh._ He thinks. _That’s what I forgot about. How the fuck did I forget about this._

 

Shane tries to pull back for a moment but Ryan’s hands settle in the taller man’s hair and he remembers doing that, remembers how much he loves running his fingers through Shane’s hair while they kiss because it’s soft and because Shane makes that little noise he does right now and because Shane grabs his hips just a little tighter when he does it – which is what Shane does this time, too.

“Ryan.” It’s barely a whisper against his mouth and Ryan could cry. The bag with the gift is still dangling from his arm and he backs off just a little to look at Shane. His boyfriend (right, that’s what they are) looks surprised and hopeful but also still so crushed and Ryan could kiss him till that last part is gone but first-

 

“I remember. Fuck, I remember where I was going before coming home.” He digs in the bag and pulls out the box. It’s comically big and he would have wrapped it in something nice but there wasn’t any time.

 

“Happy Anniversary, babe.” Ryan says and feels his voice crack because he shouldn’t get emotional over getting his boyfriend _of one year_ a fucking Poe Dameron figurine, even though it’s big and limited edition but he really feels like he could cry for a week now and Shane takes it from him, looking absolutely stunned before glancing up at Ryan.

“I wanted to pick it up that night. But then I got totaled and forgot about it and so much more and- Fuck, Shane I caused you so much pain I can’t even imagine do you think you can ever-”

 

Shane is on him again and the gift digs into his back as Shane pulls him just a little too tightly into his arms and kisses him and Ryan holds onto him and kisses back and his head is still pounding but it’s okay because there are still moments coming back and he enjoys reliving every single one of them.

 

-

 

There are still a few gaps in his memory but Shane is more than happy to help him fill them in. And should Ryan for some reason not be able to get back some of the memories, they can always make new ones.

 

Also, he’s _never_ letting Shane sleep on the couch ever again. No matter what the big oaf says.


	30. They are dating and affectionate but their friends don't get it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PrincessPink on Ao3
> 
> The exact opposite of this prompt. Ryan/Shane are dating, and no ones realized it yet/everyone’s completely oblivious. I’m talking someone walks by them kissing and thinks they just lost a bet. They bring each other gifts, people thinks it’s for a video. They get caught in a *compromising* position on the Unsolved set-everyone thinks they finally got in a fiat fight over ghosts. Think of the RIDICULOUS possibilities! Think of the multiple POVs!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Established Relationship, Comedy  
> Rating: T for swearing I guess

It starts relatively simply.

 

They’re at work and Ryan glances at his phone, saves his project and gets up, grabbing a few things.

“I got a meeting in ten so I’m gonna see you later, big guy.”

He looks over at Shane who nods and pulls down his headphones, looking over while Ryan shoves his phone in his pocket.

“Alright. See you at lunch?”

“I sure hope so we’re done by then. If anything comes up, I’ll text you. But I’m optimistic.”

Shane shoots him a half-grin and nods.

“Alright, see you later then.” When Ryan passes their desks he adds: “Love you.”

“Love you too.” Ryan says over his shoulder before walking out.

 

Behind his computer, Steven Lim muffles a snort, but Shane notices and glances over. He’s still smiling and his eyebrows are twitching up a little.

“Bit of a slip up?” Steven asks, expecting Shane to huff or flush, because the guy apparently hasn’t noticed yet that he exchanged “love you’s” with his co-host.

“No?” Shane seems genuinely surprised and Steven pauses.

“Ah. Sorry. Good for you, then.”

Shane grins and nods and returns to his computer.

 _Weird,_ Steven thinks. _Maybe they are doing some experiment where you openly exchange_ _compliments and endearments_ _or something_.

He remembers videos about paying people compliments and the lot and technically, there is nothing wrong with telling your friends you love them, no matter their gender. With a shrug, he returns to his work.

 

-

 

“Hey Ryan, what are you doing on Friday?”

Ryan lifts his head from his taco bowl.

Wednesday is the day he and Zach are grabbing lunch together because they work in different spaces now and can’t do it daily anymore. Usually they end up at a fastfood place, never anything fancy, but neither of them minds because fastfood is great.

“Uh. I’m going out with Shane.”

“Ah, dang. You got a venue yet? Because there is a new bar I wanted to check out.”

Ryan smiles apologetically.

“Sorry man, we got a restaurant booked and everything.”

“Okay, that’s fair. I was about to ask if you guys need a squad but that sounds like quality food time.”

Ryan gives him a bit of a strange look but then nods.

“Yeah. Work’s been a lot lately and he insisted we take some time off, just the two of us.”

Zach nods and takes a bite out of his burrito.

“No man, I get it. You need to hang with your friends one on one sometimes, that shit’s important.”

He wipes his mouth and misses the slight frown and giggle Ryan suppresses before shaking his head and returning to his own food.

 

-

 

On the way to the little kitchenette Jen almost bumps into Shane, which is funny because how in the world would you not see him coming from miles away?

“Oh hey, Jen. Hang on-” He moves out of the way, holding two cups of coffee over her head so she can push past him to get to the machine.

“Thanks, man.” She pops a capsule in and starts it, making a face at the whirring.

Shane leans against one of the counters and sips on one of the coffees. Once Jen’s is done, he starts talking again, clearly he had not wanted to scream over the sound of the machine.

“How’s work? I heard you ordered a suit to check out what Amazon wear is like?”

Jen nods, adding sugar to her brew.

“Yep. To be honest, I’m not expecting much. Dresses seem to be doing okay but I had my problem with suits before.” She shrugs. “But who knows, maybe it’s worth something.”

Shane chuckles.

“Well if you find something nice and they make Sasquatch sizes, hit me up. I need a new suit jacket for fancy evenings.”

“Oho!” She grins. “Got a hot date coming up?”

He seems surprised at the question, but he still smiles widely, eyes shining.

“Yeah you could say that, I’m-”

He’s interrupted when Ryan rounds the fridge and joins their conversation.

“There you are!” Shane immediately turns to him. “Got your coffee. Just the way you like it.”

The other mug is handed off to Ryan, answering the question who it was for which Jen had balanced on her tongue. Ryan takes a sip and closes his eyes. He looks relieved and the sigh he lets out speaks volumes.

“Thank you, big guy, that was just what I needed.”

Jen gets it. Nearly everyone on Buzzfeed has a caffeine addiction. She turns to grab one of the coffee stirrers. Out of the corner of her eye she sees Ryan stretch up and Shane lean down, as if Ryan has to whisper something to the tall guy. When she turns back to them, they part and for a second she could swear, they had been kissing.

 _Sure, Ruggirello_ , she chides herself. _That’s a classic case of gay goggles if I ever saw one._

The three of them keep chatting for another minute or two, Ryan tiredly leaning against Shane’s side. Shane doesn’t seem to mind, but he has never been the guy who goes “No Homo” about anything and Jen really appreciates that. Makes the workplace a lot more chill.

 

Finally, she checks her watch and bows out, waving at the boys.

“I’ll hit you up if I find a jacket for you, man.” She calls back to Shane who winks and gives her a thumbs up.

While she’s walking away, she can hear Ryan speak.

“You’re getting dressed up for someone, big guy?” It sounds teasing and she can hear Shane laugh.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?”

Right, she didn’t catch who Shane was going on a date with. Oh well, she could ask him via text later.

 

-

 

“Do you carpool with anyone right now?” Brent asks, leaning half on Ryan’s desk.

Ryan looks up, surprised.

“Uh. Yeah with Shane, I guess. Why?”

“I was wondering if you could pick me up tomorrow on your way because my car’s in the shop. I’ll pay you of course-”

Ryan waves him off.

“It’s fine, man, we’re driving anyway. We can pick you up.”

“Thanks, that helps a lot. I know we didn’t take a ride together in ages. It’s almost nostalgic.”

“Uh-huh.” Ryan says with a grin. “Except Brent 2.0 will be in the car.”

“I’ll never get over the fact that some people call him that online.”

“He called himself that at a convention, it’s his own fault.”

They share a laugh before Brent thanks him again and moves back to his desk.

 

When he gets into the back of the car the next morning, Shane is already on board. Brent wonders if he moved, because he can’t remember Shane ever taking the same trip as they did when they were still all interns. Well, with Unsolved going pretty okay and Shane creating Ruining History, he probably afforded a new place.

 

“Morning Brent. Welcome back on the old Ber-car-a.” Shane grins widely while Ryan groans.

“I told you to not make that joke.”

“You tell me all kinds of things, do I ever listen?”

“Clearly not.”

Ryan shakes his head but Brent knows he’s not really annoyed and just playing it up. He meets Ryan’s eyes in the rearview mirror and laughs when Ryan gives him an exaggerated eye-roll.

“So this is what you’re dealing with in the mornings now?”

“Not just the mornings.” Ryan grumbles. “I don’t know why I put up with him.”

Shane turns over his shoulder and leans a bit into Brent’s space. He cups his hand around his mouth, but Brent is sure that Ryan can hear the stage whisper.

“It’s because he loves me, Brent. But don’t tell anyone.”

“Shut the fuck up, Shane.” Ryan laughs from the driver’s seat. “And put on your seatbelt.”

“Yes, dear.” Shane says, only slightly mocking and Brent rolls his own eyes when Ryan’s ears redden.

_Weirdos_ , he thinks.  _Anyone outside of their social circle would think they’re flirting._

 

-

 

There are flowers on Ryan’s desk.

 

It’s a tightly bound bouquet of colorful summer flowers. A sunflower thrones in the middle, surrounded by greenery and oranges, yellows, reds and the tiniest hint of purple.

Kate doesn’t know flowers in detail, but besides the sunflower, she can recognize the green carnations here and there and they are very pretty to look at. She’s still staring at them when Ryan reaches his desk.

 

“Morning Kate.”

“Oh hey, Ryan. You got flowers!”

Ryan pauses as he lets down his bag from his shoulder, looking at the bouquet. For a moment, he looks a bit confused, but then recognition lights up his face. He looks at the flowers with a new fondness, moving them carefully so he can still look at them but has space to work. Kate sees him lean in and pluck a little card out of the greenery. He opens it and reads the message inside, smile widening as his cheeks redden just a little bit.

“Secret admirer?” She asks, grinning a bit. Kate doesn’t want to tease, she thinks the gesture is incredibly sweet and the flowers are really pretty.

Ryan laughs a bit.

“Oh no, I know who it’s from. It’s for our anniversary.”

“Ah!” Kate gets it. She doesn’t follow _Unsolved_ as much as she would like, but she figures that celebrating the anniversary of Ryan’s first great show is appropriate. Her gaze wanders to Shane’s desk. He didn’t get flowers, huh. Maybe it was because Ryan created it.

“Congratulations, Ryan!” She finally says, her honest happiness for him audible. Sure, it wasn’t a love bouquet but it was still pretty and a kind gesture.

Ryan nods, looking at the flowers with a besotted glance.

 

“He’s really going all out.” Ryan mutters and Kate tilts her head, wondering if she should ask. Before she can decide, Ryan sits down and turns the bouquet so the prettiest side is facing him. Shane joins them, waving as he spots Kate and Ryan and Kate remembers she has work to do.

 

“See you later, Ryan!” She waves and sees him smile. When she passes Shane, she turns. “Happy Anniversary, Shane!”

Shane looks surprised but then a bright smile takes over his features.

“Oh wow, thanks, Kate! I didn’t know that anyone caught on!”

Kate shrugs, feeling a little sheepish.

“I only know because Ryan told me. Good job, both of you.”

Shane winks at her and gives her finger guns before turning and walking to his desk. Ryan leans back in his chair as Shane joins him, saying something and gesturing to the flowers. Shane seems to feign disinterest.

_Dorks_ , Kate thinks fondly.

 

She is quite surprised at noon, when she mentions the Unsolved anniversary to a coworker and is corrected. It’s not for another two months.

 

“Huh.” She mutters, staring at her screen in confusion. “Then what kind of anniversary-”

She pauses, eyes widening.

“Nooo.” She whispers in disbelief. “No way…”

 

-

 

Kelsey plays video games with Ryan on her stream and he is wearing a huge sweater. She is slightly amused by it because usually Ryan doesn’t wear baggy clothes, if anything he wears shirts with barely any sleeves, but this thing is gray and _massive_.

It also says Chicago in big letters on the front and the sleeves are so long that Ryan has to roll them up before grabbing the controller.

 

“So, whose monster is that?” She asks casually, tugging on the excess fabric around Ryan’s elbow. “Doesn’t really seem to fit and you’re not a Chicago boy, as far as I remember?”

Ryan seems to flush at that and clears his throat, rubs his nose and looks everywhere but Kelsey’s direction. She frowns, first at Ryan, then at the camera.

“Just something I borrowed because the AC makes it freezing in here.” He finally says. Kelsey wants to ask, but then the match they queued up starts and she falls back into screaming in slight panic while Ryan and she try not to get creamed by a bunch of twelve-year-olds with better internet.

 

After the stream ends, Ryan leans back in his chair and grins at Kelsey.

“It’s Shane’s stupid sweater, I thought it was obvious.”

Kelsey pauses, still putting away her headphones. Now that Ryan mentions it, it makes sense. The size, Chicago, the fact that it looks pretty comfy… Still.

“Why are you wearing Shane’s sweater?”

Ryan shrugs.

“I was cold and he had it and said he didn’t need it, so he kind of forced me to wear it.” He seems amused and Kelsey chuckles a bit.

“That’s cute.”

Ryan actually flushes at that and fiddles with the edge of the sleeves he rolled down again.

“Shut up, he’s just being a pain, acting like my mom and all.”

“He’s probably just worried you’re gonna freeze, Ryan.”

That makes the guy smile and he looks down, dragging a hand over the lettering on his chest with an almost tender expression.

“Yeah, probably. I should thank him.”

Kelsey nods.

“You do that, I’ll start cutting best bits.”

 

Half an hour later, she passes Shane and Ryan in the hallway. Shane has shoved his hands in the sleeves of the sweater Ryan is wearing and the shorter man tries to wiggle away, yelping something about Shane’s hands being cold.

She snorts, used to the ghoulfriends teasing each other a lot but she pauses her step when Shane grabs onto the sleeves tighter and pulls Ryan in and _Ryan actually moves closer and pushes on his tiptoes to kiss Shane._

Kelsey blinks as she sees Shane return the kiss and then smile at Ryan with soft, happy eyes.

 

“Huh.”

 

They don’t notice her as they disentangle and leave, most likely going back to their desks.

 

-

 

It’s another wrap-up party and _everyone_ in the office is drunk. Steven is drunk, Zach is drunk, Jen is drunk, Brent is drunk, Kelsey is drunk and Ryan and Shane are… gone.

 

Zach is the first to notice because he lets his eyes sweep the dance floor and the two faces of Unsolved are clearly missing. Not two minutes ago they had been dancing in the middle of the fray and now it was just Eugene getting down with a couple of coworkers surrounding him and cheering him on. He nudges Jen who interrupts her conversation with Steven and looks at him questioningly.

 

“Where are Ryan and Shane?” He asks and Jen cranes her neck to look around the room. When she doesn’t spot anyone, she shrugs.

Zach looks around and everyone else is frowning a bit. It’s the Unsolved wrap-party, it would be weird to leave your own wrap-party early.

“Maybe they were asked to take pictures or something,” Brent suggests as he pours himself another shot from the bottle in the middle of the table.

“Could be.” Steven is eating the rest of the mixed nuts that had been put on the table earlier. “Or they just left to make out in the bathroom.”

He laughs and so do Zach, Brent and Jen. But then Zach notices Kelsey pursing her lips and when he looks at Kate, she stares at the ceiling, feigning innocence a little too hard.

“What?” He asks, looking between the two.

 

Both jump a bit, clearly drunk enough to think that they were subtle. The others at the table lean in, sensing some gossip coming up. Instead of answering, however, Kelsey stares at Kate in surprise and Kate opens her mouth, pauses and closes it again.

 

Jen is the first to prod.

“Do you guys know something we don’t?”

Kate holds up her hands.

“I don’t really know anything. I just know that not too long ago, Ryan got flowers for an anniversary and I first thought it was for Unsolved, but it wasn’t and apparently it’s Shane’s anniversary, too, so I was wondering if- You know.”

Kate shrugs and seems a little embarrassed. The group slowly drags their gazes from her to Kelsey who looks uncomfortable now.

“Okay hang on, I don’t know if it’s okay to talk about this. _If_ something is going on and they haven’t said anything, maybe it’s a secret, I don’t know.”

 

There is a long pause at the table while everyone is frowning a little and Zach wonders if they are going over their interactions with Shane and Ryan. He certainly is and he has to admit, Ryan has mentioned more than once that he’s going out with Shane to the movies or for dinner. Now that Zach reconsiders it, it seems very much like they were going on dates. Steven mutters something under his breath and Jen has her eyes screwed shut, fingers pressing against her forehead as if she is trying to recall something in detail.

Brent finally says: “I mean… I think they are always coming to work together. They certainly take the same car.”

Zach hums.

“Wait so… is it a secret or are we just all really stupid?” He almost starts to laugh. “I mean most couples here don’t make out all the time in the office so…”

Kelsey suppresses a laugh but doesn’t comment.

While they still ponder, Zach sees the door to the balcony open and Ryan walks in with a wide smile. His cheeks look slightly red in the warm indoor lights and right behind him follows Shane, looking equally flushed. With the new angle, Zach zeroes in on that as well as their dopey grins and the fact that _these two are holding hands_.

 

The rest of the table slowly raises their heads when they follow Zach’s glance and when Shane and Ryan walk up to the table they are welcomed by five pairs of eyes staring at them in different states of confusion and curiosity. It makes Ryan slow down and a slight frown spreads over his features. Shane stops as well, looking more surprised than worried. He is still holding Ryan’s hand.

 

“Uh.” Zach starts eloquently. “Dumb question but: Are you two dating?”

He feels how the other four hold their breaths. For a moment both men seem confused and they turn to look at each other. Shane shrugs and smiles a bit and Ryan seems to suppress a laugh as he looks back.

 

“Yeah? Of course we are. I thought it was obvious.”

 

The entire table _explodes_. Everything from “I knew it!” (sure, Steven) over “What the fuck!” (same, Brent) and “I’m so dumb!” ( _same_ , Jen) is exclaimed as everyone talks over one another. When they calm down a little, both Ryan and Shane are wheezing with laughter, barely able to keep on their feet.

 

Zach still feels dumb as they all sit around the table and Shane says that he and Ryan have been together for over half a year and Ryan bursts into actual laughter when everyone shares their assumptions.

 

“We’re just private people, we thought it was kind of obvious but we didn’t want to shove it down anyone’s throat,” Ryan says at their questions and Steven shrugs.

“Clearly not obvious enough. Buzzfeed apparently employs a lot of idiots.”

“They do.” Ryan says grimly. “And he’s my favorite idiot.” He points at Shane who pretends to be insulted but is smiling when Ryan presses a kiss to his jaw.

Zach makes a pretended gagging noise at the cuteness and Ryan flips him off.

 

Five minutes later, they are all dancing and Ryan says something about having to make things more obvious which Shane seems to take as an invitation to pull him into a bump and grind and Kelsey wolf-whistles while the others pretend to be scarred for life.

It’s a fun night.

 

On Monday, Shane and Ryan walk in hand in hand, wearing matching “I’m with stupid” shirts that point perfectly at each other while they sit at their desks. Each shirt has been altered with sharpie so the shirts read “I’m with (not really that) stupid” and Jen assumes that’s what the office deserves when she sits down across from them at their own desk. She’s greeted with twin smug smiles and Jen answers by sticking out her tongue before tearing her eyes away from the couple and focusing on her work.


	31. Vampire!Shane + Werewolf!Ryan first Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> theawfuledges asked:  
> Vampire!Shane and werewolf!Ryan meet on a dating app for non-humans and are surprised by how well they get along/their chemistry when they meet offline

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Vampires, Werewolves, Supernatural Beings AU, First Date, Online Dating  
> Rating: G

Shane fiddles with his cuffs and looks around the restaurant for the sixth time in the last ten minutes. He arrived early,

_way_ too early, because he had been so anxious about being late on accident that he got here about twenty minutes before he was supposed to meet Ryan.

 

Ryan.

He takes his phone in his hand again and unlocks it. His eyes settle on Ryan’s profile, the picture of him leaning against a wall, arms crossed, fists pushing just a little behind his arms to put his impressive biceps on display. Shane remembers the little flutter he felt the first time he dared to message the other man. Part of him had expected to be brushed off and ignored. Ryan was gorgeous and Shane had long accepted that he was kind of weird and lanky and his height made people consider going out with him. Even if Ryan didn’t have a problem with that, Shane half expected to be rejected for being a vampire.

Just because Ryan hadn’t specified any type of partner on the profile didn’t mean he didn’t have any preferences.

 

But, miracles happen apparently and Ryan had messaged him back. They had exchanged a couple of jokes about the old “bats and dogs don’t mix” stereotype before launching into a chat about everything and nothing. Shane had already feared the conversation would crash and burn when Ryan brought up sports, unable to contribute. However, over a strange mix of Shane mentioning that he grew up in Chicago, jokes about the Bulls and Michael Jordan and Space Jam and a quick diversion into Looney Toons territory, they had started to talk movies. It was the start of a conversation that ended with both of them falling asleep on their phones while lying in bed and they had picked up right where they left off the next night.

 

Movies weren’t the only thing they had in common. They both enjoyed the same terrible jokes, theme parks, Halloween and food. Both had laughed about the irony about them liking Halloween and Ryan had put his foot in his mouth by asking Shane about food. Shane had done just as bad when he asked Ryan what form he chose for jogging.

Despite the little hiccups, they eventually agreed on meeting for dinner. Shane picked the restaurant, a nice little place that catered to the more supernatural types of guests and Ryan agreed to meet him there.

Shane is looking through the menu, trying to guess what Ryan would go for when he hears the waiter come closer, catching the tail end of what she’s saying.

“…over here.” She says and indicates towards Shane at the table. Shane nearly jumps up, eager to stand to his full height in the suit that he brushed up for the occasion only. His eyes settle on Ryan who looks even more gorgeous in person. He’s slightly flushed, his hair is gelled back and he is wearing a nice dark red shirt and suit pants. His sleeves are rolled up and Shane gets a great view of Ryan’s arms – and if he wasn’t already technically undead, Shane would die over those.

 

“Hey.” Ryan says and his voice is bright and warm and Shane feels the old yearning for lying in the sun for an hour or two without worries. Holy shit. Weird. But also kind of amazing.

“Hi.” He answers and holds out his hand for Ryan to shake. Ryan snorts but takes it, giving it a firm shake and Shane shudders at how warm those hands are. The other man glances up and smiles.

“Your hands are so cool. That’s actually pretty nice.” Shane frowns.

“What… really?”

“Yeah. I always burn so hot that I sometimes feel like I have a constant fever. It’s refreshing.”

“Huh. Well, I’m glad to be of cooling assistance.” Shane jokes and he hears a soft wheezing laugh in return as they let go and shuffle to their seats. Shane thinks about pulling out the seat for Ryan but the other guy beats him to it and the shorter man flushes a little more as he stands with his hands on the back of Shane’s chair, indicating to it.

“Thank you.” Shane says with a smirk as he sits and he sees the other man clear his throat and avoid eye contact. He allows himself a giggle, mostly because he gets the luxury of not having to stress about blushing. If Ryan is offended it doesn’t show.

 

Dinner goes smoothly. They chat, they eat and Shane laughs at the monstrous meat dish that Ryan orders and devours.

 

“No reason to _wolf_ it all down, Ryan. They won’t take it from you.”

“Funny.” Ryan says, face expressionless. “Never heard that one before.” He wipes his mouth with a napkin before continuing. “I need to stack up on calories. Full moon’s coming up.”

“I can never sleep during full moon.” Shane admits. “I get antsy.”

Ryan wheezes again.

“Don’t worry about that, big guy. I know what it’s like to get antsy. I usually stumble into a Denny’s at three in the morning and ask for whatever.”

Shane chuckles and sips from his glass.

“Well you can always text me during those nights if you’re bored. I’m not a runner but I could at least hang with you in whatever park you want to rampage.”

Ryan snickers.

“What, you don’t feel in the mood for running? We could go dancing instead.”

“Do they let you in clubs if you wolf out?”

“There are a few.”

 

Ryan’s eyes are twinkling and Shane feels himself smile. He isn’t a big party guy but hitting the dance floor with Ryan sounds like fun. It’s been some time since he just let loose at a party without having to worry that heightened emotions and excited heartbeats around him get too distracting.

 

“What about you?” Ryan asks, nodding his chin towards Shane. “What do you do for fun?”

“Uh, well. I spend a lot of time at home. You know, I think I mentioned that I’m kind of new to this… uh, _life_ and I’m not always in control.” Shane clears his throat, toying with his fork. “I don’t want to hurt anybody, you know.”

He glances up at Ryan, who looks serious, but nods with a hint of a smile.

“I get it. I’m fine with staying in. Uh.” He pauses, stammering. “If- If you want to meet again, you know. We could just- Watch a movie or something.”

“I would love that.” Shane says before Ryan can get freaked out. His date deflates visibly and smiles at him.

“Oh. Cool. And for the record, I’m… pretty strong. So if you want we can also go out and I can have an eye on you and help you leave the place if you want.”

Shane smiles.

“Sounds like a plan.”

 

They move to lighter topics. Before they know it, most of the night is over and it’s time to pay their bill. Surprisingly enough, Shane is the one to suggest taking a stroll around the area and Ryan seems surprised but delighted.

There is no running, no transforming, no measuring of strengths that night. It’s not quite first date material. Instead they find a 7/11 and buy snacks and chat as they eat and walk.

Ryan slips a warm hand in Shane’s cool one and Shane feels the little flutter in his chest again.

 

He could do this again. And again and again. The thought of spending nights, especially the tougher nights with Ryan, distracting each other sounds wonderful. He wonders if Ryan will let him feed off of him one day. In return, he wants to run with Ryan, wants to help him power through his transformations, wants to gather him up afterwards with a change of clothes and some water and snacks. Right now, Shane doesn’t say that, but he files it away for later. Another night. Another date.

 

Tonight, they’re holding hands and talking about their favorite crime shows. Tonight, Ryan bounces up and down next to him as they are chatting. Tonight, things just fit the way they do.

 

He has to remember to give SuperDate a five star review on the app store.


	32. Ryan protecting Demon!Shane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> For they Shyan prompts thing, demon!shane constantly getting stuck in situations that would get him found out (idk like someone spilling a bunch of salt or smth)and Ryan has to keep coming to his rescue? Plz & thx, ly

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Demon!Shane, Demons, Shenanigans, Fluff  
> Rating: G

Shane is pretty sure he isn’t bad at hiding his identity. Sure, he isn’t the greatest, stealthiest demon to ever walk the earth but he isn’t _terrible._

 

Fine, sometimes the cameras make him look a little too much like his true self when he and Ryan are filming episodes, but everyone looks kind of weird in night vision cameras. His eyes aren’t even _black._ If he really wanted to show his true eyes to anyone, they would get treated to eyes with barely any whites, true, but also no full black scleras. Just large, yellowish irises and stretched, horizontal pupils. Goat eyes, funnily enough. Not quite like Steve’s. Shane’s don’t glow in the dark. He never did show off his eyes to anyone though. At least not until now.

 

Actually he used to keep his demon self very well hidden. It really isn’t his fault that he has terrible luck.

 

-

 

It starts one Wednesday when he’s helping out in the Tasty kitchen. They need some additional camera work and Shane is taking care of the hand-held camera trained on Rie’s face. Everything goes just as planned until the moment when one of the interns knocks over one of the big jars in the back. Shane originally thought the things are just for decoration, but he freezes when the jar smashes on the ground and salt – a lot of salt – suddenly spills out from the destroyed container. Luckily, nothing actually hits his body and he’s spared from uncomfortable burns, but the stuff spills right between Shane and Rie. She is standing at a counter and the salt forms a complete and effective line that stretches from wall to counter and when she moves aside, Shane can’t follow her, so he’s slowly moving to round the counter and keep the camera on her face.

 

“Hang on, Shane.” The director interrupts him. “Just step over it and get closer to Rie. We’ll clean it up once the segment is filmed.”

Shane breaks out in a cold sweat. He can’t cross the line between the counter and the wall. He is physically incapable of doing so. Even if someone pushed him, Shane would hit an impenetrable wall. He could even get hurt over this.

Apologies manifest in his brain, each more ridiculous than the last and at the glare of the director, Shane shuffles back, carefully inching closer to the dreaded line of salt. He’s thinking, panicking, unsure of what to do and what to say. He has to find an excuse. Somehow, he has to save himself from being exposed.

 

But then, by sheer luck and coincidence, Ryan comes in with a dustpan and broom and the second he dives and drags the broom through the salt, Shane feels a weight drop off his shoulders. He hides it with a cough and a shuffle to the side to give Ryan space to work and since the line is broken, he steps over the rest of the salt without any troubles. The director is cool with Ryan cleaning up, Ryan has no problem doing it – he’s here to wait for Shane anyway so they can grab lunch together – and the show can continue. Shane thanks whoever is having an eye on him that Ryan’s urge to clean the set popped up at just the right moment.

 

At least, he thinks, there’s someone down there who has an eye on him. It’s what he settles on as an explanation.

At first.

 

-

 

“Don’t try it, demon!” Ryan snaps, drawing the ridiculous water gun with surprising speed and Shane staggers backwards on instinct.

“Wow!” He says, trying to sound joyful. “That’s spooky.”

Ryan is smiling, maybe even laughing as he holsters the gun again. He doesn’t “shoot” Shane with it like Shane feared and part of him exhales in relief.

 

Sure, holy water isn’t the worse that could be done to him. It would burn his body a little and sure, it would hurt, but that’s not why Shane is afraid. He can handle the little burns the water would leave on him. He can handle the time and energy it takes to heal his body. (It is his body after all, he had it commissioned. If he was possessing someone, ducking out was always an option but if you had your own body, you were sort of reliant on it and he really didn’t want Shane Madej to have burn scars everywhere because his friend laughed at the idea of squirting him with holy water.

 

But thankfully, Ryan doesn’t shoot the water gun at him and Shane can relax. He’s not exactly _calm,_ because he can see that the plastic toy isn’t entirely leak-proof. While Ryan walks around on location, the water gun drops occasionally. Shane is far away enough to be safe, but it still makes him uncomfortable.

 

The day after the shoot, TJ finds the plastic gun on top of Ryan’s bag and makes a big show out of having the one tool to destroy demons. Shane gets it, TJ doesn’t believe and Mark, who is the first to get shot with a tiny stream of holy water doesn’t either. The cameraman is just laughing as he ducks away from any more shots and before Shane can really prepare, TJ has turned and is pointing the gun at him. He instinctively flinches and ducks. Of course, it won’t do anything. If TJ hits his clothing, the water will soak into it and burn Shane anyways. It will hurt. It will _burn._ But worse than anything, it will show the team what Shane really is.

Shane didn’t use to be so attached to people, but he likes Buzzfeed. It’s just the right place to cause the right amount of chaos and disgruntlement. People get irritated at videos and articles and it’s all Shane needs. Internet trolling is the future of demons, he just knows that. But now, TJ is pointing a water gun filled with holy water at him and everything is going to get out. Except that the moment TJ pulls the trigger, Ryan accidentally walks past Shane to get to his bag.

There is a surprised squawk and then a lot of enraged yelling mixed with Tjs apologies through laughter and the sounds that Devon and Mark make in the background while they try not to openly laugh at Ryan. Shane only allows himself a snicker, a lot less than what he would usually leave Ryan with. Instead, he offers Ryan one of his sweaters while Ryan’s own dries and he’s surprised when is friend actually accepts.

The whole ride back home, Ryan is wearing Shane’s sweaters and Shane tries to ignore the feelings that leaves him with. If Ryan knew what he really was, he would never speak to him again. Better not set himself up for heartbreak, Shane thinks while he glances at the dozing Ryan.

He looks indescribably adorable in Shane’s too-long clothes.

-

It’s really not how he imagined to be exposed.

Shane thinks that nearly all of the seances, rituals and other little tricks Ryan tries on location are nonsense. Ghosts are so incredibly rare that even Shane with his true sight has only seen a few on location. On top of that, they usually aren’t active or powerful enough to interact with them. Ryan tends to get himself too worked up and panicky about nothing and Shane’s rolling eyes and exasperated sighs are very genuine in these situations. Of course, he wants Ryan to be okay and happy. It’s not like he wants the little guy to have a heart attack.

If Shane is completely honest with himself, he will have to admit that there is no human he wants to be happier than Ryan. Still, he wishes the whole “tell Ryan you’re not human thing” could have happened _outside_ of Unsolved.

But Ryan has somehow managed to find a ritual that is actually a legit ritual to expose demonic power. And Shane even helped him, being the idiot that he is, because he thought the thing is not going to work.

And yet, here he is. A red aura pulsing around him, the candles around the circle they used for the ritual are flickering but not going out, no matter how hard Shane tries to snuff them with his powers. Ryan’s hand-held camera and the go pro on his chest are trained on Shane who has started to lose control over his humanoid form. Ryan will be rich and famous for exposing Shane. It somehow lessens the pain of having to leave this man and Unsolved and probably the world.

“I knew it.” Ryan says, smug expression on his face as he turns off first the hand-held cam and then the one on his chest. “I knew you were… like that.” He snorts as Shane can only stare at him with wide eyes.

“I figured you needed some assistance with keeping… you know. On the down low. You’re not really the most subtle person, with all the talk of eating pickles out of ponds and enjoying the work of the torso murderer and that stuff. But… you’re still my best friend. And I trust that you won’t eat my heart when I help you, okay?”

Shane watches as Ryan shows him the footage he managed to capture of Shane’s true form before deleting it. Shane still has a heart in this form and it’s beating hard and unrelenting in his chest as he stares down at Ryan.

“But… what? Why?”

Ryan smiles and reaches out to take Shane’s hands. The nails have grown, but skin and bones and fingers are still the same shape.

“I figured out a while ago that you weren’t human, but when I kept an eye on you, you never seemed to harm anybody. So… I figured since you wanted this to be a secret, I would help.”

“Oh.” Shane says dumbly. He blinks. “Does… does that mean that it’s okay for me to tell you that I like you?”

Ryan chuckles.

“As long as demons aren’t somehow murdered by affection, I’m cool with that.”

Shane chuckles a bit. His cheeks warm as embarrassment takes him over.

“We’re… not. But I guess you knew already. You seem to know whenever I needed your help.”

Ryan chuckles and brings Shane’s hands up to brush a kiss over the knuckles.

“And you seem to know whenever I need your words or presence on location. So. Whatever you saw and kept from hurting me or whenever you got me to leave a dangerous room… thank you.”

He smiles up at Shane and Shane has to swallow and clear his throat a couple of times.

“Of course.” He leans his forehead against Ryan.

“Thank you as well. For keeping me safe.”


	33. Ryan + Daddy Kink

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Oooooo ok i have a prompt ;) shyan + daddy kink. Go crazy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: First Time, Getting together, Daddy kink  
> Rating: M

Ryan actually hasn’t expected to get this far. Maybe his brain is overwhelmed by Shane’s response, maybe he is just too horny to think, but in the crucial moment, something he wanted to keep to himself slips past his lips.

-

The whole thing started relatively innocent. They are having one of their usual “TV” nights. Ryan isn’t even sure anymore what they were watching. He assumes it was some sort of creepy show on Netflix, but he really can’t recall the name of it right now to safe his life. It definitely was something supernatural and ghost-related, because he remembers shivering in his seat, as subtle as he could manage. Of course, Shane had noticed and mocked him for it right away. Ryan isn’t stupid, he knows that most of Shane’s jokes on location and during horror movies exist to make him less tense. Shane is his best friend and Ryan is relatively confident to believe that he is Shane’s best friend, too. And yes, when it comes to the supernatural, they have very different views, but it would never endanger their friendship. Still, Ryan can’t help but feel alone and abandoned sometimes, like when Shane falls asleep on location or disregards Ryan’s fears whenever the spirit box spits out a full sentence. Which is why it feels even more touching to notice Shane trying to distract him from the uncomfortable feelings a simple horror movie causes.

 

Sometimes – rarely – Shane gets sick of how skittish Ryan becomes. It’s when the “Hey man, it’s okay” turns into “What is wrong with you?”. However, the underlying worry and care is still somehow there. It always it. Ryan has to admit that it’s hard to dispute that Shane cares for him and it makes Ryan feel warm, relaxed and happy.

Sometimes he wishes they could talk about it. Far away from cameras and crew and friends. He kind of wants to ask Shane what he really feels, if they are just friends or if they could be something more. If there is something different than friendship in all those layers of care and affection or if Ryan is just chasing a dream.

 

Yes, he has dreamed of it, of course. Dreams while he’s asleep, made up by his subconscious and dreams while he’s awake, the drifting during daytime that sometimes just _happens_ while he’s doing research. Ryan has played through the scenarios of one of them confessing a lot and he is pretty sure he has gone through every single possible situation. The ones where Shane confesses to him out of the blue are his favorite, but sometimes he sits at home and hurts because he dreams about confessing to Shane and being rejected. Some of his fantasies are kind enough to paint Shane the way he sees him, a little snappy but ultimately a kind person, a good friend. One who would let Ryan down gently. But when Ryan is in a bad mood, his brain supplies a different version of Shane. A disgusted, angry and hateful twist on his best friend’s mellow personality.

Ryan knows Shane isn’t like that, but it still hurts.

 

For the sake of his own mental health, he withdraws a little. He knows it isn’t fair on Shane, but Ryan needs some space. He needs to think of other things, other friends, other stuff that makes him happy. Ryan plays some basketball, grabs some good food, watches some nice movies. The last distraction kind of hurts despite everything, because watching movies is something he usually does with Shane and when his best friend asks him if he wants to watch the new Halloween together, Ryan just can’t make up an excuse. So they go to the premiere together, they take some pictures with Michael Meyers and afterwards, they go to Ryan’s place and watch the original, because it’s still good.

 

Despite everything, Ryan still jumps when Michael smashes his fist through the closet and Laurie screams and ducks to escape the knife. Shane laughs at him, but he sounds soft. There is no real mocking in there. Ryan grumbles and rubs his forehead because it’s less embarrassing than hiding his face in his hands, but then Shane scoots a bit closer and puts an arm around Ryan.

Ryan freezes. He looks at Shane’s hand squeezing his shoulder and then slowly, carefully lifts his head up to look at Shane’s face. Shane seems relatively disengaged, still looking at the TV, but Ryan can see his throat working and the way that his eyes flicker across the screen and around the room tells him that Shane isn’t really watching the movie anymore.

 

“Shane?” Ryan is surprised how calm his voice sounds. His nervousness isn’t betrayed by his words, but he’s also glad that he doesn’t sound angry or cold. There is simply a question hovering between them, one that neither of them said out loud but both threw in the room. It’s a question that Ryan would put as: “Do you want the same thing I do?”

 

So he stares up at Shane until his friend looks back at him. It’s quiet, except for the TV playing in the background and Shane seems to be looking for something on Ryan’s face. His eyes scan across the shorter man’s features as if he isn’t sure. Meanwhile, Ryan is looking up at Shane and slowly, carefully beginning to smile. They lean closer, noses brushing, breaths mingling and they are _still staring at each other._ Ryan is finally the one to break eye contact when he allows his eyes to slip close and leans in. Shane must have moved as well, because halfway in, Ryan’s mouth is met by Shane’s and then they’re kissing.

 

-

 

Ryan has some trouble describing how everything went down after that. He remembers that they kissed, a lot and for a long time. He remembers Shane’s hands around his face and his fingers in Shane’s hair. He remembers whispered words and soft confessions.

 

Shane had gone home that night, but there were conversations about calling each other and talking about everything. Eventually, they kept their promises.

Ryan doesn’t know how he did it, but somehow, despite all the confusion, he had ended up in a relationship with Shane Madej. And Shane actually wanted this, had probably been worrying about ruining their friendship as well, maybe, just maybe, he had even been lovesick and stupid like Ryan had been.

 

After a couple of weeks, however, their initial fear and worry is slowly getting better. They went out on dates, they talked, they kissed a lot and slowly allowed themselves to settle into this new variation of their relationship.

 

Ryan is still new to having a guy touch him all over but he is surprisingly comfortable with it as long as it’s Shane. Comfortable to a point he hasn’t quite explored himself, which gets a new energy to course through his veins.

 

All he remembers is molten kisses, the way Shane’s arms tighten around his waist, his fingers entwined behind Shane’s neck-

He was searching for Shane’s mouth again, gasping as he is pushed back against the sheets of his bed. A couple of months ago, the thought of being exposed like this to Shane would have freaked him out, but there is a pleasant shiver that ripples through his muscles as Shane starts to drag open mouthed kisses down Ryan’s neck and over his shoulder. Ryan runs his hands down Shane’s back, sighs deeply and closes his eyes as his head dips back.

 

“Fuck, that’s so nice… don’t stop, Daddy…”

 

His mouth is still standing open when Shane’s lips pause against his Adam’s apple. Ryan freezes, full on, tensely and completely freezes. His breath stops as Shane’s lips leave his neck and the other man pulls back. It’s right when Ryan’s brain is starting to go into overdrive. For a moment, it almost feels as if a hurricane started in Ryan’s brain, his mind whirling and panic slowly rising.

 

“Was that-” Shane looks down on him and Ryan wishes he wouldn’t ask. “Did you just call me… what I think you called me?”

“I’m sorry.” Ryan clears his throat and rubs his forehead. “I don’t… know where that came from. Sorry.”

Shane cups Ryan’s face and his gaze flickers across Ryan’s flushed face.

“No reason to be sorry it’s just… new. Holy shit.”

“I know.” Ryan swallows and laughs helplessly. “I didn’t mean to spring this on you. It’s new for me as well, I didn’t mean to- I mean… Of course I want you to be part of this, but not… now, you know?”

Shane chuckles.

“It’s fine, Ryan, don’t worry.” He takes Ryan’s hand and kisses the knuckles. “You can share anything with me, alright?”

Ryan slowly nods, taking in Shane’s face. The other man doesn’t seem to be dishonest. In fact, his eyes are bright and excited and Ryan feels the heat of arousal roll through him.

 

“You could… call me that again, if you want.” Shane says softly, too softly for a kinky command.

Ryan swallows. He reaches out for Shane’s hands and intertwines their fingers. His hands drop back afterwards, settle next to his pillow and stay there as if Shane is pushing him down. Ryan looks up.

 

“I want- Uh.” He clears his throat. “I want you to take me, Daddy. Please?”

Shane blinks. His face is unusually pink.

“Of course.” He shifts above Ryan and puts just the slightest hint of pressure on Ryan’s hands, pushing them into the mattress.

The effect is immediate. Ryan gasps, Shane’s eyes widen and they dive for each other again, Ryan still held down while Shane crouches over him. The whispered groans, praises and the occasional moaning of “Daddy” soon blur together into a cacophony of noises when Shane wraps his long arms about Ryan and Ryan softly bites down on Shane’s shoulder.

 

-

 

It’s really not what Ryan expected at all, even after he and Shane got together. Somehow, however, he can’t complain, when he is curled up in Shane’s arms, feeling utterly taken care of and protected from the world. He could sleep for days, but sadly work will be in the way. Still, he thinks, as Shane half-awakens to press a kiss to Ryan’s forehead, this discovery had been real, all of this was real and he feels happy that he gets to experience it with Shane by his side.

 

Especially when it comes to new kinks.


	34. Nerdy Talk / Dirty Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> gaylittlepieceofsh1t asked:  
> Based off a Misha Collins con video: Shane and Ryan are in the "martial bed" and Shane starts talking dirty about the nerdiest thing possible. Bonus points if it's a history fact, double bonus if Ryan really gets into it. Not too nsfw (I mean I know "marital bed" is as nsfw as it gets but leave stuff to imagination)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to go with the prompt as it was said, I hope I kinda managed to not just have them nerd off about things? XD The video in question is [here](https://4evamc.tumblr.com/post/179265342801/dirty-talk-in-marital-bed-jenabean75). The stuff about the Ice Cream Wars came from the article [here](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.atlasobscura.com%2Farticles%2Fthe-violent-ice-cream-wars-of-1980s-scotland&t=ODU2OTZhYTBmYTI2YWMzM2Q1YTIyNTUzNjQxODlhMjhhNTNmZDkwZCxjejVRZFFwcQ%3D%3D&b=t%3AYn7yeH6TFQHiTZbD-pYglw&p=https%3A%2F%2Fghoulboyboos.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F179317641755%2Fbased-off-a-misha-collins-con-video-shane-and&m=0) and the story of Nicholas Girod is over [here](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=https%3A%2F%2Fgonola.com%2Fthings-to-do-in-new-orleans%2Fhistory%2Fnola-history-nicholas-girod-and-the-plot-to-rescue-napoleon&t=Mjk0YTkyZDQ1NDgxMzk2MDU2ODlhN2VkZDY5MDM3MTkxZGEyMTZhZCxjejVRZFFwcQ%3D%3D&b=t%3AYn7yeH6TFQHiTZbD-pYglw&p=https%3A%2F%2Fghoulboyboos.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F179317641755%2Fbased-off-a-misha-collins-con-video-shane-and&m=0). History sure is fun…
> 
> Tags: Dirty Talk (not really), Established Relationship, Nerds, fluff  
> Rating: T

Shane stretches out all of his limbs and wraps his arms around Ryan’s middle, pulling him closer to his side of the bed. Ryan huffs a laugh, but lets him, eyes still trained on his phone, scrolling through the article he’s reading.

He seems determined not to get distracted, but Shane wants attention and starts slowly kissing up Ryan’s neck and jaw pressing his face against the other man’s cheek.

 

“You’re ignoring me.” He grumbles against Ryan’s stubbly skin. “I’m pretty sure that’s a big rule break as a husband.”

Ryan chuckles and takes one hand away from his phone to rub Shane’s thigh, patting it soothingly.

“Well, I’m still kind of new to being a husband. Maybe I haven’t studied all the rules yet.” His tone is teasing and he laughs as Shane grumbles next to him. Still, Ryan gives in a little and rolls over to wraps the arm holding the phone around Shane’s shoulders, tucking him close.

“On top of that, we got work to do, big guy. The honeymoon’s long over and it’s time to prepare for the new season.”

Shane’s fingers drag under the back of Ryan’s shirt and flex against his warm skin.

“On _Monday,_ yeah. It’s Saturday night. You’re ignoring me on Saturday night in our martial bed. That’s downright criminal.”

“Not really something for _Unsolved,_ though.” Ryan’s smile presses against the lobe of Shane’s ear and the taller man relaxes a bit into the hug. “It might be a crime to you but not to the world.”

“Yeah.” Shane says dryly. “And I already know who the horrid criminal is that lets his husband starve for affection.”

“Jesus. You’re so overdramatic.” Ryan sighs as if Shane is a huge pain, but he curls closer. For a minute or two, the room falls silent as they two relax in each other’s arms.

Then-

 

“Are you still reading that fucking article?” Shane asks suddenly, sounding affronted and Ryan starts to wheeze, barely able not to curl into himself.

“It’s really interesting! I’m trying to get behind this. Whole-”

“At least read it to me. If you’re not going to do anything with me, you could at least entertain me.”

“Nobody forced you to wrap your sixteen feet body around me. You could grab your phone as well,” Ryan chastises him, but he pulls his phone closer, rubs circles on Shane’s back with his free hand and starts to narrate.

 

Without meaning to, his voice drops a little, taking on the tiniest hint of a growl. It’s not quite his narration voice that he uses in the show. It’s more intimate and quiet because his mouth is right next to Shane’s ear. Because of that, it sounds like a soft rumble and Shane shivers a bit as Ryan’s breath tickles his ear.

 

“Let me tell you about the Violent Ice Cream Wars of Glasgow, Scotland in the 1970s and ‘80s…”

 

-

 

“You know,” Shane starts out of nowhere a couple weeks later while he’s leafing through a terrifyingly huge volume of historical dates. “The whole Ice Cream Wars thing is still somewhere in the back of my head. I mean sure, it’s ridiculous and fun – except for the whole… you know, drugs and murder – but I think it’s the way you told it to me. It was weirdly hot.”

Ryan looks up from his laptop, a confused frown in place.

“What?”

“I mean it! The way you whispered those stories about ice cream trucks and mafia-style family rivalries was kind of… good. Almost like dirty talk. Except you weren’t saying anything about us doing it, just talking about smugglers and the mob.”

Ryan is wheezing now, saving his project and shutting the laptop.

“You’re not actually serious. You’re shitting me!”

“I’m really not.”

Shane lifts an eyebrow at Ryan, before he glances down at the book still in his lap. A small grin draws over his face and he gets up from his cross legged position on the floor and carries the book over to Ryan on the sofa.

“Want me to test it with you?”

Ryan frowns, nose scrunching as Shane sits down next to him and pulls Ryan’s legs over his lap.

“I mean… I don’t think obscure history is going to get me hot and bothered but if you feel like this is an experiment you absolutely have to try-”

“Great.” Shane interrupts and throws an arm over the back of the couch, fingers brushing against the back of Ryan’s neck. “Then get comfortable, baby and let me talk history to you.”

 

This time, Ryan actually snorts, but he lets Shane maneuver him closer so Shane can place his chin on Ryan’s shoulder and murmur into his ear.

 

“I got an exciting story for you. It’s the story of Nicholas Girod, the man who hired a pirate to rescue Napoleon Bonaparte.”

Ryan suppresses a wheeze, not trying to ruin the mood right away. Shane’s voice isn’t like he narrates in _Ruining History,_ where he usually falls into a clear, (mostly) serious narration. Instead, it’s low and soft, much more like he would talk to Ryan when they are having a sleepover on location. His voice is a little darker than usual and there is the faintest hint of a growl in the back of his throat. Ryan’s skin starts to prickle.

 

“Nicholas Girod was a mayor of New Orleans. The fifth person to ever hold that position.” Shane’s voice spikes just a hint at the word “fifth” and his mouth brushes Ryan’s ear. “You should know that Louisiana and New Orleans were _very_ interested in what Napoleon was doing overseas and Girod was a big supporter of his. Of course, he didn’t like the notion that Napoleon was just exiled on a lonely island…” His voice trails off after almost hissing at the word “exiled” and Ryan glances over at Shane only to be greeted by an intense gaze at him.

“You see, Nicholas was French, but he knew how to deal under the Spanish system. He was smart. A merchant.” Shane’s eyebrow quirks. “And a friend to pirates and privateers.” His voice is somehow even lower and softer and Ryan realizes he can’t quite break eye contact or move away. In fact, when Shane moves more into his space, Ryan leans in as well.

“So after Waterloo, Napoleon sat on this island called St. Helena, which was off the coast of West Africa. In 1815, Girod resigned as mayor of New Orleans and hired the famous privateer Dominique Youx to assist some of Napoleon’s Imperial Guard with their move to the New World. He also prepared a house for Napoleon to live in once the Emperor was rescued.”

 

Ryan realizes he’s gaping and that he can feel Shane’s breath on his lips. His heart is beating a bit faster and for a moment he has to shake himself out of the effect Shane’s words had on him. Huh.

“That…” he starts. “Is weirdly kind of hot.” He lets out a nervous giggle at Shane’s grin. “What the fuck.”

Shane laughs and pulls back a little.

“Much better than talking about what we’re going to do in the bedroom, right?”

“Eeeh.” Ryan shrugs. “On par. Not better. You didn’t tell me the end of the story yet.”

Shane laughs.

“I’m afraid that’s gonna be a bit of a downer. Not quite as hot as privateers moving out to save the Emperor of France.”

Shane’s fingers trace the shell of Ryan’s ear and Ryan leans in again, running a hand up Shane’s arm.

“What happened?”

“Napoleon died before they could get him. The plan had already been well underway, but Girod couldn’t rescue his idol as it had been his dream.”

“Bummer.” Ryan murmurs against Shane’s lips before he’s pulled into a kiss.

“But he was remembered as a philanthropist and his donations to the city helped build the home that Louis Armstrong would start his musical career in one day.”

“Hot.” Ryan says dryly. “All that talk about dead people and long lost wars are really going to get you into my pants.”

Shane waggles his eyebrows and Ryan pulls him in again before he can say anything stupid.

 

His husband is bound to say stupid things sometimes.


	35. Ricky Goldsworth x Shane Madej

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Are u still taking prompts? How about Ricky Goldsworth asking a v flustered Shane out to dinner?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Ricky Goldsworth, Flirting, Flustered!Shane  
> Rating: G

Shane isn’t exactly proud of his current situation. Of course nearly everyone has a job to help pay for college at least somewhat, but Abercrombie isn’t what he had been rooting for deep in his heart.

He’s at film school for Christ’s sake. At the very least he had hoped for a job at a cinema, but sadly no such luck. He’s stuck at a shop that sells clothes worth more than what he’s paying for college all semester and the people are a pain in his posterior.

First his supervisor gets arrested for stealing clothes. That shouldn’t be his problem but somehow it is because Shane is now forced to supervise himself and the only other employee in the men’s section. Rich people are incredibly cheap, which doesn’t surprise Shane. In days like these he dreams of communism. The clothes he deals with every day lose their shine of being new and well made. Once someone yelled at him wearing one of the three piece suits Shane lugs around every day the sight leaves a sour taste in hos mouth. He tries not to be too affected by it but he can’t help himself. It’s getting him down.

Which is why his smile is very forced when twenty minutes before closing time a man enters Shane’s floor. Shane instantly spots him because he is literally the only person around and he is heading straight for him. Shane holds his breath. He’s gotten pretty good at reading customers by now and this guy is probably going to be terrible. He’s wearing a three piece suit with an ornamental vest and Shane can see the glimmering chain of an honest-to-god pocket watch dangling from the vest pocket. His shoes are shined and everything about his outfit screams money. Tasteful nuveau-riche, Shane guesses, which is at least better than tasteless nuveau-riche who only want the most expensive suit of the bunch.

 

Still, the man walks with confidence and pride, his hair is slicked back and as he comes closer Shane notices that the man is relatively short. Of course, even tje male models that sometimes come here are shorter than Shane, but this guy barely makes average. A touchy subject for most influencial people.

Shane already seed himself busy for the next hour, bending to the man’s whim only to have him walk away without buying anything-

When his train of thought gets interrupted.

“I’m so sorry, I know you’re about to close and I’m displaying terrible manners here, but I’m having a date tonight and I need something less pompous than this.” The man gestures to himself, but Shane stands there with his mouth open.

The man’s voice isn’t quite smooth, there is a certain roughness, but it’s dark and beautiful and sounds vaguely dangerous despite the kind words. From up close, the man’s eyes are huge and black and his brown skin glints in the usually unflattering lights of the store.

“Uh.” Shane manages, aware that he’s gaping like a fish. “Of course. What were you thinking of?”

After the initial stun, he manages to hide behind his rehearsed sale conversation and actually build complete sentences. The customer introduces himself as Ricky Goldsworth and when Shane says his own name and prepares to add “I’m happy to help you find your perfect suit.” the man interrupts with a small smirk that allows his canine to gleam and the murmured repetition of “Shane” with his lips and tongue curling around the name.

Shane curses his pale skin because he blushes so, so easily and he can hear Mr. Goldsworth’s chuckle as his ears and neck burn hot.

Even though Shane wouldn’t have minded Mr. Goldsworth to take longer, the man finds a dashing blue suit to his liking. It fits well and Shane is surprised as he notes the swell of the man’s bicep and chest under the jacket. The customer catches him staring and winks and Shane almost bursts into a rant of apologies, only to be silenced by a wave of the man’s hand.

“Don’t you worry. You almost saved my entire evening with this. And I don’t want to keep you here any longer and make you go overtime. I’ll take the suit and I’ll recommend your assistance warmly. There is only one little thing I have to ask of you.”

Shane doesn’t even check the time. He simply nods.

“Anything, Mr. Goldsworth.”

“Have dinner with me.”

Shane gapes again.

“What?! Sorry… I mean: Excuse me?”

“I said I have a date tonight but- silly me, I forgot to ask you if you’re even free. I hoped I might get lucky… I often get lucky, you see, but I should have asked first.”

“I- You- I-” Shane’s brain clearly has clocked out. Or the heat in his face has boiled it. “Do you… Are you serious?”

Ricky Goldsworth laughs. He throws his head back and laughs out loud and Shane’s heart sinks. Of course it was a practical joke. This guy probably made millions each year and Shane was a fucking clerk. But then the man in front of him takes his hand and curls his surprisingly calloused fingers around Shane’s long ones.

“I would be very happy if you had dinner with me. I have a reservation for two at a very beautiful Korean Grill place and I would be sad to have to go there alone.”

“Uh. Sir, I really am not anybody to take to a place like that.” Shane stammers before the guy gets the wrong idea. “I’m not a CEO or supervisor. I’m just a clerk-”

“Yes? So? You’re very handsome. I hve a thing for tall men and I also think you look delightfully delicate. All aspects I enjoy. I have seen you here before and thought that tonight, I would try my luck. But if you’re not interested, I want you to know that you’re not obligated to. I’ll still buy this and give you a great rating. I don’t want to force you-”

“You wouldn’t!” Shane clings to the other man’s hand. “I just… don’t know if I’m the company you want.”

“Well. I do know. And I also know that you should have enough time to finish and lock up before we have to go. I can wait in the car outside. I don’t mind.”

Shane swallows. This is getting intense. Or rather, the way this guy looks at him is getting intense. And Shane really doesn’t hate it.

“Okay.” He manages finally. “I would… love to.”

Mr. Goldsworth’s lips part into a pearly white, shark-like grin.

“Perfect.” He brings Shane’s hand to his lips and brushes a kiss over the knuckles. Shane is sure that if spontaneous human combustion is a thing, he is going to be the next victim.

“S-see you outside, Mr. Goldsworth.”

“Ricky. Please.”

And then he is strutting towards the checkout, his old suit over his arm. Shane checks his pulse and it’s rabbiting at a pace that should be concerning.

“What the fuck.” He thinks as he’s checking everything and closing the doors. “What the fuck.” His brain goes on as he locks up shop. “What the fuck,” he mutters as he slides in the back of an expensive black car, next to Mr. Goldsworth, well, Ricky.

The guy has a driver.

“What the fuck.”

“You alright, handsome?”

Shane flushes again, but he nods.

“Just wondering what is happening.”

“Well, first we’re going to have dinner. Then I was thinking maybe the movies… I love the cinema you see. And if you’re interested, a drink at my place.”

Shane rubs his hands together. He’s sweating up a storm.

“Okay. Cool. Sounds great.”

Ricky chuckles next to him and leans close to his ear.

“Don’t worry, handsome. I’ll take good care of you.”

“This is how I die,” Shane thinks as he takes the man’s hand again. “He’s gonna call me handsome one more time and my head will just explode.”

It doesn’t. Shane gets to hear it a lot more from that night on.


	36. Shyan + Standrew / Shane and Ryan get turned into kids

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Magic = bad. Now Steven and Andrew have to look after smol! Ryan and Shane who have a crush on each other, while trying to hide the fact that they also have a crush on each other (or vice versa)  
> I woke up on cold sweat I know you’ve done a smol!au before I meant child ksjfks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Kidfic, turned into kids, babysitting, banter  
> Rating: G

“Oh my God isn’t that a precious little guy!” Freddie exclaims, bending down to look into the face of the kid Steven’s carrying on his hip. The maybe five-year-old boy beams at Freddie with a huge, white smile before giving Steven a look she could almost interpret as smug and Steven rolls his eyes.

“A relative of yours?” She asks, when Steven doesn’t answer and the kid stays quiet. That question gets her offended glares, funnily enough from both Steven and the boy.

“Really, Freddie? Because we’re both Asian? I expected more of you.”

“Uh, no?” She gives him a judging look. “I’m asking because you’re carrying him around and I don’t assume you stole someone’s child. You also don’t strike me as someone who has a secret baby, so I figured he might be a cousin or something.

“Oh.” Steven deflates. The kid is giggling.

-

“You really didn’t have to make eyes at Freddie, you know.” Steven grumbles as he continues his way towards the Buzzfeed “Kiddie Corner” where employee’s with children can leave their kids in careful hands.

“I would have talked to her if you didn’t tell me to keep my mouth shut,” Ryan complains. It’s weird. The vocabulary and cadence is still the same, but Ryan has the voice of a little kid now and his tongue is clearly stumbling over a couple of words. He doesn’t have a lisp, but he sounds like he still has to get used to having a smaller mouth and less teeth and whatever other changes he went through when he got turned into a kid. Steven always told him not to mess around locations too much, but Shane was a bad influence on him. At least Shane got cursed as well. Steven briefly wonders how Andrew is doing. That thought makes him nervous, so he answers Ryan instead.

“I had to. You sound nothing like a little kid, Ryan. People would notice something’s up.”

“I doubt that. People usually are as stupidly dismissive as Shane is. They love to think up the dumbest of explanations.”

“Will you stop talking about Shane for five minutes, Jesus. You’ll see him again in a few.”

“I’m not- I didn’t-” Ryan starts stuttering and under normal circumstances, Steven would sit back and laugh at Ryan’s dumb crush on his co-host, but right now he is busy.

When he hands Ryan off to the caretaker and she asks for his name, Steven freezes. He can’t call the kid Ryan, people would notice how much he looks like Buzzfeed Unsolved’s Ryan Bergara. Ryan of all people saves his ass:

“I’m Ricky!” He calls out, childlike voice surprisingly believable as he holds out his hands towards the lady who just laughs and takes him out of Steven’s arms.

“He’s a cousin of mine…” Steven mumbles, but he is mostly ignored because the lady has started to chat with “Ricky” about the games they could play.

Not for the first time that day, Steven wishes that Andrew was with him.

-

Shane is a little bored. He likes kids, they are fun, but usually he is in some form of “authority” or at least intimidating in whatever way kids consider a very tall dude. Now, he is barely taller than the children around him. The other children because he is a child as well. It’s been a long time since he’s been one and he is sure he is acting suspicious. At least this places has Mega Bloks, even though Shane would have preferred Lego.

He is building aimlessly and without a real plan, when suddenly he’s tapped on the back. He squares his shoulders, preparing to discourage whatever kid is trying to join him when he spots a familiar face. It’s not quite as familiar as it used to be, but he can still see Ryan in this kid. Even if not, they woke up together on location yesterday, turned into little kids and panicking. Ryan looks a bit better now.

“Oh. Hey. Steven’s here, then?” Shane keeps his voice low so nobody listens in. Ryan nods.

TJ and Devon had transported the “kids” home and - in lieu of a better place - left one Ghoulboy each with one of the Worth It Boys. Adam was spared because he is currently assisting with another shoot for a couple of days. Andrew and Steven both thought they were being pranked for a Buzzfeed video, but eventually admitted that no child actor could reproduce Shane’s completely insane and off-track ramblings that well. Ryan had complained a lot about being handed off to Steven but Shane understood. They couldn’t just go home. Sure, they still had their adult minds so it wouldn’t be exactly like leaving children unsupervised, but a lot of things were way too dangerous to try alone and at their current height. Shane really doesn’t want to get smashed in the head with the microwave because he can’t reach it properly, so having Andrew for assistance had been really helpful. Shane made a point of telling him so.

He doesn’t know how Steven and Ryan spent their evening but he had a relatively normal night in with Andrew, except that Andrew insisted to bring him to bed at eight because at the moment, Shane looks to be about six and it eight is a normal time to go to bed for someone of that age. He had tried to protest, but realized that he was actually close to passing out when Andrew put him on the couch and tucked him in. That last part was so unnecessary, but Shane fell asleep before he could complain. Apparently, his body very much had the metabolism and inner clock of a little kid because he slept for ten hours and woke up feeling refreshed and energetic. He hadn’t felt like that in forever.

Ryan looks like he did yesterday. For someone who knows him well, it’s very obviously Ryan, just a little different. His hair is even messier than before and his cheeks are a little rounder, but his eyes and his smile are as big and as bright as before. Well, minus the constant bags Ryan usually has under his eyes. He looks a lot more fresh faced now.

“Wanna play?” Shane asks, indicating towards his half-finished whatever the hell he is building. Ryan looks at it before shrugging and dropping on his knees on the play mat, scooting closer. They are dressed in kid clothes now, thanks to Devon and TJ making a quick stop to buy them proper clothes yesterday. Until then, both he and Ryan and been wrapped in their ow (now way too big) shirts. Shane has to admit that Ryan looks adorable in his blue overalls. It’s a strange thought and it’s also weird to see such a close friend as a little kid. Well, weird and intrusive in a way that makes Shane uncomfortable.

“I’m glad I’m not alone in this.” He mutters, because he feels like he should say it. Ryan is looking at him but Shane keeps his eyes fixed on the blue block he puts on top of the little wall he set up. “Not that I want you in the same mess as I am in. Just… you know. Helps to keep sane when you’re not the only one.”

“Nah man, I get it.” Ryan looks around to make sure nobody is listening. “I just hope this isn’t permanent.”

“Otherwise we have to create “Buzzfeed: Kids” and milk this mess for all it’s worth.” Shane grumbles and he hears the first real wheeze from Ryan since they woke up in this mess. It turns into a full laugh and Shane finally looks over at his giggling friend. It makes Shane laugh as well. Sure, Ryan’s smile is still the same. But their laughs sound lighter, softer. More innocent, he thinks and immediately makes a face at that.

“What’s up?” Ryan rubs the corner of his eye as if he actually laughed himself to tears.

“This is weird.” Shane mumbles. “I feel like I shouldn’t see you this way. This is something that is kept to our childhoods and our family and stuff. Not your co-worker who probably got you into this mess.”

“I highly doubt it was just you.” Ryan rubs his nose. It’s kind of runny. Someone will probably make him blow it soon. “And… I don’t know. It’s kind of fun. We kept finding out about obscure stuff that we both did despite never meeting before. But now we kind of… get to be childhood friends. Because for some reason you don’t have five years on me now.”

“True.”

Shane sits back and looks at the building they made. It looks horrendous.

“We will never be architects.” He says sadly and Ryan laughs again.

-

Andrew and Steven pick them up after work and decide to just grab dinner together. It’s easier than cooking and being in public will force them to not rant and panic about what happened to Ryan and Shane. It’s supposed to be relaxing. _Really._

It’s only when the four of them are seated around a table in a nice little restaurant with Shane and Ryan placed on extra big cushions and the kiddie menu in front of them, that Steven realizes what this must look like. A sweet gay couple and their equally sweet little boys. Fuck. He only hopes Andrew hasn’t noticed. He glances over.

Andrew has his elbow on the table and his chin leaned into his palm. His gaze is on Ryan and Shane, who are playfully squabbling over the menu. Ryan tells Shane that he is ridiculous for wanting chicken nuggets in dinosaur shape while Shane fires back that if there ever was any time appropriate for that kind of stuff, it was now. Andrew is smiling softly and Steven stares, not realizing he does until Andrew’s gaze drags over to him and they both start, returning to their menus. Steven is sure he can hear muffled giggles from the “kids” but he won’t address it

The waitress is very fun and sweet and chitchats with the “children” about their favorite foods. Steven thinks that Ryan and Shane lay on the “cute little kid” stuff a little too thick but she seems completely enchanted by them, so he can’t really reprimand them in front of her.

“Oh he’s not my brother.” Shane says when Steven tunes back in. “He’s my best friend. My ghoulfriend!” With that, he takes Ryan’s hand, completely oblivious to Ryan’s face lighting up and turning red at the same time. The waitress giggles and mutters something about them being cute before she finishes taking their order and leaves. Shane seems fine with keeping Ryan’s hand, but the other boy winds his fingers free after a while, muttering something about Shane’s hands being sweaty.

Steven rolls his eyes and looks over at Andrew. Andrew is looking at him, a thoughtful expression on his face. The smile he’s directing at Steven is careful and soft and Steven is about to ask, but finds that he can’t. They all eat in a strangely awkward silence.

-

Shane sits on Steven’s couch while the “grown ups” are busy in the kitchen and looks at Ryan. They picked a Netflix movie to distract themselves and nearly got into a fight about it. Shane had seen no reason why they shouldn’t watch a horror movie as always but Ryan had insisted that it felt weird to him to watch one while he looked like he was five. Sure, he wasn’t actually that young, but still. Shane thought it was dumb, but he had conceded to watch Coco instead, which was more “age appropriate”.

“Did I overstep earlier?” He asks out of nowhere after staring at Ryan for a while.

“What?” Ryan blinks at him.

“When I took your hand, I mean. I didn’t… I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, I just felt like doing it.”

“I don’t know.” Ryan frowns at him as if he’s suspicious. “Do you always want to do that or just because I’m… I dunno, small and adorable right now?”

Shane laughs.

“You’re always small and adorable, Ryan.”

“Fuck off!”

“Language!” Andrew calls from the kitchen.

“Shut up, Andrew!” Ryan shouts back. “I’m not a little kid! Not really at least!”

Shane takes a deep breath when Ryan turns back to him.

“Would it be okay if I wanted to hold your hand sometimes? Or maybe… do other things?”

“What things?”

Ryan has leaned in a little. His hand is brushing the back of Shane’s hands and he seems a little apprehensive at what might happen. Shane can’t really tease him when he looks like this. A scared little kid, even more vulnerable than usual. So he shrugs.

“Once we figured this out, I mean. I would like to take you on a date or something.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I mean. I figured life is really weird.” He gestures to their situation. “And I’m not so scared about making things between us weird anymore.”

Ryan looks at him for a moment. His bottom lip is pushed forward as he is thinking and his brows slowly pull together. Then, as if he made a decision, he leans in and kisses Shane’s cheek. It’s just a quick peck, but Shane feels his face light up anyway.

“Okay, big guy. Once… once you’re a big guy again.”

They both wheeze.

-

When Steven and Andrew check on “the kids”, they find them asleep. Curled together on the sofa with Ryan’s head on Shane’s shoulder and Shane leaning against Ryan’s head, they snore. Andrew is smiling again, the soft, domestic expression that Steven has seen on him a lot the past few days. It makes his stomach flutter all funny and weird. They each carry one of the boys to bed and watch as they immediately curl on their sides, faces towards each other.

“I’m sure things will not be the same once this is all over.” Steven says, as he closes the door behind them.

“Yeah, I think the same. I don’t really mind, though.” Andrew is glancing at the floor when Steven looks at him.

“What do you mean?”

Andrew shrugs.

“It’s kind of… fun. Playing house with you and all.”

“Really? Playing house? That’s what you’re gonna call it.”

Andrew shrugs and chuckles to himself.

“Okay. What is so funny?” Steven puts his hands on his hips. “You keep smiling and laughing and looking at me all weird since we have this whole kid debacle. What in the world is going on?”

Andrew leans closer, almost caging Steven against the wall.

“I just think… you’re really sweet like this. Even though you and Ryan keep calling each other names and stuff, you’re really caring and you want to help them and I think that‘s admirable. And also really cute.”

“Oh.” Steven blinks. “Well, okay.” He doesn’t know how to deal with this information but he definitely knows that his face is warm and his heart is doing funny things in his chest. He kind of feels like he should take Andrew’s hand or something. So he does. Andrew links their fingers and smiles his weird little domestic smile again. Okay then.

-

Ryan and Shane wake up in Steven’s apartment, curled into each other and the stretched out versions of kid’s pajamas straining over their bodies.

“Thank fuck.” Ryan mutters as he tosses the too-small t-shirt aside. He’s about to get out of bed when an arm sneaks around his waist and Shane pulls him back against his chest.

“Shane!” Ryan hisses. “What if Steven checks on us or-”

“He’s busy.” Shane mumbles into Ryan’s hair, forcing the other man to settle into bed again. “Heard them talking last night. Stuff happened.”

“What stuff?” Ryan asks, but he lies down again, curling up against Shane’s side.

“Later.” Shane yawns and cuddles closer to Ryan, rubbing his back. “Sleep now. You’re much cuddlier like this.”

“Fine.” Ryan rolls his eyes.

He could ask later and mock Steven for whatever happened.


	37. Beetlejuice AU / Ghost Ryan and Shane adopt a little goth kid.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> haunted-gays asked:  
> Hey dude! Big fan of your work here. If you are taking prompts, I'd like to suggest a Beetlejuice AU where Shane and Ryan are a loveable ghost couple (bonus points if they adopt a neglected goth kid in the end). Thank you in advance! Spooky season, hell yeah

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Established Relationship, OFC, implied major character death, Ghost! Ryan, Ghost! Shane, references to Beetlejuice.  
> Ratings: T
> 
> This one took a lot longer than I anticipated! I apologize for making it kind of cheesy and feelsy instead of creepy but I figured that Ryan would be too scared and Shane too soft to summon fucking Beetlejuice on someone’s butt. ;D Hope you enjoy!

Meena squints up the outer wall of the house. It looks vaguely Victorian with the brick walls, pointed slate roofs and a porch that is really more of a gazebo. _Gothic Revival left its mark_ , she thinks as her parents and the movers take the trips to and fro to get everything inside. There is a large iron fence surrounding the house, but the bars are wide enough to not make it feel like a prison. She looks at the house again, taking in the small tower – _I think the term is “turret”?_ \- just left of the middle. Maybe if she got there first she could claim it as her room.

  


The stairs look new, but the sixth one still creaks loudly. Something to keep in mind if she wanted to sneak out some time. Usually Meena didn’t give her parents much trouble. They weren’t _terrible_ , they were just busy all the time and boring as dust. Her dad was in insurance and still in the mindset that he had to protect her from her first boyfriend. _Yeah good luck with that, Dad._ Meanwhile, Meena’s mother tried her best to turn her into a “respectable young woman” which didn’t really work out, considering she nearly screamed when Meena showed up with a black and purple undercut and refused to go back to her natural chocolate brown.

  


She was much happier alone and alone she would be once the tower was hers. _Turret. Whatever._

  


-

  


About a week after moving in, she notices something strange. Whenever her parents are out, things seem to be moving on their own. She has yet to catch it, but she is sure that someone is moving stuff around.

  


Her parents’ bedroom is one of the spaces. The house had been nearly completely empty when Meena moved here with her parents, but a couple of objects seem to have been forgotten by the original owners. On the wall, right above where a bed must have been for many, many years, was a wooden frame with a butterfly behind glass. It was a real one, very pretty in bright shades of blue. His mother considered it tasteless and put it in a drawer. When the butterfly somehow ended up on the wall again, Meena didn’t think much of it until her mother asked her not to put that horrendous thing back up and that it wasn’t a funny prank. Meena didn’t say anything, just nodded and rolled her eyes as always. But she had grown curious. She took the butterfly from the drawer and hid it under her bed, making sure that her parents didn’t see her take it away. The next day, some time in the afternoon while her dad was busy in his office and her mom was shopping, Meena checked under her bed. The butterfly was gone. She rushed down the stairs to the second floor and peeked into her parents’ bedroom. The encased butterfly hung above the bed as if it had always been there.

  


Meena chuckled and carefully took it down to tuck it under her arm.

  


“I’ll get you a new space. Otherwise my mom is going to throw you out.” She whispered to the frame, even though the butterfly was long dead and couldn’t hear her.

  


She drove a nail into the wall of her little room and hung the butterfly over her desk. Her mom was horrified but allowed it while her dad only shook her head when his wife told him.

The butterfly stayed put after that.

  


-

  


When Meena had opened the door to the room that would be hers for the first time, an old guitar had been sitting against the support beam in the middle of the room. Meena didn’t know how to play guitar, but she had brushed her fingertips over the strings anyway. Up here, the acoustics were nice. The tone of the instrument had echoed a little in her still empty room. She had put it behind the door when she made the room her own, not wanting to knock it over.

  


A few days after, Meena stirred from her sleep in the middle of the night because she could swear she could hear music. Just a couple of soft chords and something else, maybe a voice humming a song she didn’t know. When she opened her eyes, the room was empty and quiet. The guitar rested innocently in its original place against the support beam.

  


She screwed her eyes shut and counted to ten before pinching herself in the arm. It hurt. She wasn’t dreaming. Meena opened one eye and glanced over. The guitar still sat against the beam in the middle of her room.

  


Meena pulled the blanket over her head. Creepy.

  


-

  


She finds out about the source of the strange moving objects one night when she can’t sleep. The new school rubs her the wrong way, because the kids think she is weird and creepy – which is exactly what she is going for but there was no reason for them to be rude about it – and Meena lies awake thinking about what to do if the teacher reprimands her for her hair _again_ when she hears the shuffling of footsteps outside. At first she thinks her mother is going to check in on her, but then she hears muffled voices. Two male voices. She frowns. None of them sound like her dad. Is someone breaking in? How did they not trigger the alarm downstairs? The only window up here is in her room and she definitely would have noticed someone creeping in.

  


She freezes when the door to her room suddenly unlocks. The click is incredibly loud in the quiet of the night and her eyes are wide when the door slowly but surely swings open, creaking only a little bit. Her breath stops when she sees two shapes move in, slightly hard to make out in the bit of moonlight that’s falling in through the window.

  


“I think these people are alright, Shane. We should just leave and let them have their lives.”

“You know we can’t leave. We tried.”

  


Meena strains her eyes. She can make out the man that was addressed as Shane. He is really, really tall and it’s kind of freaky to see someone that tall in her little space. He is slim, too. _Lanky,_ Meena thinks. The moonlight falls on his face and her worries about burglars are calmed while the other, slowly growing worry in the back of her mind is confirmed:

  


_Ghosts._

  


The man called Shane looks younger than Meena’s parents, maybe in his early thirties and from what she can tell, he looks kind of pale. A big head full of fuzzy hair and kind of hard to see, a plaid flannel shirt and jeans. There are only hints of color to him, the red of the shirt and the blue of his jeans washed out like he’s a photograph left in the sun for too long. He’s a little bit see through and in the moonlight there is a silver glint to his outline. The other person steps closer. He’s about a head shorter than Shane and maybe a few years younger. His hair is dark and his skin, despite the ghostly pallor, is darker, more bronze. He’s clad in a t-shirt and a zipped up jacket, the mustard color of the jacket as washed out as the red of Shane’s flannel. He is wearing jeans as well and a pair of sneakers that Meena expects are the kind of shoes that the popular jocks at school would wear. The shorter guy seems to be a sporty guy, but she doesn’t get a jock vibe from him. Neither of the men seems to notice her.

  


“I know we can’t leave. But we could… you know, stay back. Let them have the space.”

“Ryan…” Shane looks at the other man with a look that Meena sometimes sees her mom give her dad when he’s overworking himself. Caring but exhausted. Loving, but with a hint of inner pain. She glances over at “Ryan”, who seems to deflate.

“I know, Shane. I don’t want to leave this place either…” His eyes are locked on something and Meena follows his gaze to the guitar that sits in the middle of the room. She looks back and watches as Shane curls an arm around Ryan’s neck and presses a kiss to his temple.

  


Suddenly, she feels like she’s intruding on a private moment, which is ridiculous because this is _her room_. So, Meena sits up and turns on her bedside lamp.

  


Ryan screams.

  


  


  


The scream echoes in the octagonal room. It’s how Meena finds out that her parents can’t hear these two at all, because the volume of Ryan’s scream causes the glass in the windows to vibrate and her dad wakes up at the slightest of sounds.

  


Everything stays quiet downstairs. Up in her room, however, Shane is howling with laughter while Meena and Ryan stare at each other. If she’s honest, she is a little afraid. Who wouldn’t be? But seeing Ryan that frightened just because she turned on her light helps a little. Shane’s laughter does, too. Finally, Ryan gathers himself and slaps the other man against the arm. Meena can see them connect and hears the smack, even though they look like they are not quite there.

  


“Will you stop laughing? You’re making me look like an idiot!”

“You managed to do that yourself, man, that’s not my fault!”

“Hey!” Meena interrupts, because she hates being ignored. Somewhere downstairs, her father snores really loud and she holds her breath for a moment. He can clearly still hear _her_. Not a dream, then. But there are no further noises so she looks at the two men again, who have stopped arguing and are staring at her.

  


“Wait…” Shane blinks, staring at Meena. He takes a step to the side and stops when she turns her head to follow his movement.

“You can see us?” Ryan’s voice is quiet and he still sounds weirdly scared. Meena looks at him and nods and the two look at each other.

“Holy crap.” Ryan whispers and Shane reaches out to take his hand. Meena can see how hard Ryan is squeezing it.

  


“Uh…” She blinks. “Who are you? I mean… I gathered your names-”

“We kind of… caught yours as well.” Ryan says quickly. “Through your parents. We’re around here a lot, you see. Sorry.”

“It’s fine.” Meena sits up more and pulls her cold feet under her to sit on them. “I kind of spied on you, you kind of spied on me. Seems like we’re even.”

  


Shane chuckles and Ryan breaks out into a surprised grin. They exchange a glance and Ryan wheezes.

Meena catches Shane murmuring “I like her.” before he squares his shoulders and holds out a hand towards her.

“Hello, Meena. I’m Shane. Sorry for invading your bedroom but you see, it used to be our shared office and we’re still kind of attached to it.”

Meena reaches out and takes Shane’s hand. Or rather, she tries to but her hand just passes through. A tingle brushes through her skin, as if her hand had fallen asleep for a second.

  


“Oh. Well. I could have seen that coming.” Shane laughs, clearly embarrassed as he rubs his nose. Ryan behind him is shaking his head.

“I keep telling you things about ghosts but you never listen to me.”

Shane turns his head and crosses his arms.

“You still didn’t give me a single good explanation why we’re still here, Ryan. We don’t have any regrets or unfinished business, right?”

Ryan bites his bottom lip and nods. Meena clears her throat, still feeling like she’s intruding and both men start and look at her.

  


“Sorry.” Ryan says, deflating. “We’re not used to… other people anymore.”

Meena looks from one to the other.

“How long…”

“I don’t know.” Shane sighs and sits down on the floor, folding his limbs into a cross-legged position. “Time is passing… weirdly. I don’t remember dates. Not years, at least. Sometimes I think we’re asleep-”

“Not asleep.” Ryan interrupts. But he sits down next to Shane. “More like… gone. For a while. We completely missed you guys moving in. For a while, we thought you were the ghosts.” He exchanges a slight smile with Shane and Meena bites her bottom lip.

Shane smiles slightly.

“I didn’t want to believe I was actually a ghost… you know, I never believed in this stuff when I was alive. And I might have gotten… a little angry when we noticed you guys. It wasn’t anything personal. I just felt like our home was being invaded.”

Meena remembers the fuse blowing when the movers put up the dining room lamp. She remembers the loud crash upstairs nobody could explain. The cold breezes her mother would complain about…

  


“I don’t know much about ghosts.” She finally says. “But maybe you still feel like you belong here because you two are so young…?”

Both seem surprised, but then smile. Ryan shakes his head slightly as he’s smiling, as if remembering something fondly and Shane’s eyes seem to glint in the moonlight.

“Oh no, don’t worry about us.” Shane chuckles. “We’re not… we didn’t die like this. We lived here together for a long time. Actually…” He frowns, glancing over at Ryan. “I think we were close to our Gold Anniversary when I passed.”

“We were.” Ryan’s voice is softer and the smile is slowly slipping from his face. Shane reaches out and takes his hand again, their fingers entwining.

  


“You were married?” Meena asks. She looks at their hands, expecting to see wedding bands, but there is nothing.

“Yeah.” Ryan rolls his eyes but he looks affectionate. “He beat me to the proposal, I remember.”

Shane shrugs, smirking.

“Not my problem if you fret so much about it. You postponed it one time too many and missed your chance.”

“I still did propose to you.” Ryan’s sidelong glance is softer than it seems at first. “The right way.”

“You cried when I proposed to you, babe. You loved Disney.”

“Shut up.”

  


Meena giggles. They were so different from how her parents interacted. Teasing, joking, but clearly affectionate. Her parents were quiet and their conversations and movements practiced and repeated to death. It was strange, but these two seemed much more alive than her parents.

  


Ryan smiles at her.

“I’m sorry if we creeped you out. And… sorry for screaming. I used to be terrified of ghosts my whole life and it’s a hard habit to break.”

Shane giggles a bit, but he shuts up when Ryan shoots him a glare.

“It’s alright.” Meena says. She has pulled her duvet around herself to keep warm and glances over to the guitar.

“I heard one of you play…”

Ryan flushes and Shane starts to grin widely.

“That was the one and only Bergara Guitara!” He is laughing when Ryan pushes at him. “No but really, he kept it to himself but he did play beautifully.”

“Shut up.”

“I mean it. You would play for me sometimes and it was _always_ beautiful.”

Ryan huffs.

“I kept it to myself. I liked to play to relax, you know.”

  


Meena nods.

“What about the butterfly from downstairs?”

Ryan groans and rolls his eyes.

“That’s Shane’s stupid thing.” He shakes his head when Shane grumbles “It’s not stupid” and holds up a hand to stop him. “It was a gift he got forever ago. The room your parents turned into their bedroom was ours long ago and he had to win a long, grueling trivia game against me to be allowed to put it there where it continued to creep me out for decades. So yeah, he’s used to it being there and wanted it to stay there.”

“I like it here, too.” Shane says, smiling. “This was our… workshop. I liked being here.”

Ryan snorts.

“That makes us sound like we were artists. We weren’t. We made Youtube videos about conspiracy theories and haunted houses and strange history.” He’s smiling, despite his dry tone and Shane grins widely, spreading out his hands as he turns to Meena.

“It was amazing. We were friends long before we got together and just butting heads on all of that stuff was so great. Sometimes we would talk for hours on end about all kinds of stupid stuff and then only stop because we were starving.”

Meena laughs and Ryan seems to mellow a bit.

“Maybe that’s why we can’t leave. We’re really attached to this place… And we found out that we can only touch the things we owned in our time… There isn’t much left of it, though.”

Meena nods and looks over at the wall where the butterfly is mounted.

  


“I’m sorry you’re stuck here.” She whispers. “But I’m glad I have someone to talk to, now.”

Both men pause at that and exchange glances.

“Your parents seem… busy.” Ryan says diplomatically. “They will probably be right back caring for you after the first stress of the move is over.”

Meena shakes her head.

“They are always like that. It’s fine. I’m comfortable with being left alone.” She swallows. “Most of the time.”

  


“You know,” Shane begins softly. “We’re not able to leave this place… and it’s been a long, long time since we had a visitor. A real one to talk to. I think it could be nice if we… hung out sometimes.”

“Really?” Meena sits up a bit. Ryan nods.

“Sure. We could tell you some history about the house. There are a lot of great things that happened here. If you want, that is.”

“Deal.”

Meena holds out her hand before she realizes that shaking Ryan’s hand will be as impossible as shaking Shane’s.

Shane saves the situation by giving her finger guns and a wink, causing his husband to roll his eyes and do the same. Meena giggles and points her fingers at them, adding a little click sound as she winks back.

  


Thus, a pact was made.

  


-

  


Meena starts to look forward to coming home after school, now. Her parents are usually not in, but Ryan and Shane will hang out in her little attic space, usually talking about some theory or another. Sometimes Meena will catch them talking about their situation and how to solve it. On rare occasion, she catches them talk about her. From what she can gather, they are worried about her. Not in the fussy, annoying way her mom is or in the distracted, serious fashion her dad “tries”.

Shane and Ryan ask how school has been, what subjects are her favorite. They catch on when she’s upset about the other kids. Shane talks her through re-dying her hair, revealing that he had a lifelong friend who loved to die her curls purple or turquoise.

  


Somehow, having Shane lazily float over the empty bathtub while she washes the rest of the dye out is reassuring.

  


“Looks pretty rockin’” Shane says, waggling his eyebrows and Meena is sure that “rockin” was already out of fashion when Shane was young, but she still appreciates it.

  


-

  


Ryan teaches her how to play the guitar.

  


Shane is usually banned from their sessions because he can’t stop talking about Ryan playing the guitar and while it’s always sweet, Meena is sure he does most of it to tease the other man.

It’s strange, having Ryan’s fingers pass through hers to connect with the frets and strings, pressing down to show Meena where to put her fingers. Still, she adores the sessions, because she is actually starting to like playing and because the glances her friends shoot the instrument when they think Meena isn’t looking become less pained.

Somehow, the guitar is starting to become hers. She can’t quite explain it. Ryan is still teaching her and encouraging her to practice, but he doesn’t have to lead her hands anymore. She is starting to remember the chords, or looks them up online. One night, she catches Ryan brushing his fingers across the strings.

  


There is no sound.

  


-

  


She gets in an argument with her mom. A bunch of kids chased after her after school, yelling about her having bats in her hair and rats in her clothes. She slams the door.

  


Her mother is home, which is a rare occasion and she is not pleased at Meena slamming the door.

  


“You know, darling, I just think that if you got dressed a little more… appropriate, the other kids would find you a bit more approachable.” Is all she says when Meena tells her.

It’s one of the rare occasions when Meena looses her cool.

“Mom! I’m being treated like shit because I’m being _myself_ and all you got to say to me to help is telling me not to be _me?_ Spoiler alert: You’re not helping.”

She runs up the stairs, ignoring her mother call after her as she runs up both flights and slams the door behind her, sliding down against it.

“Leave me alone!” She shouts when she hears shuffling steps, burying her face in her arms.

  


“Hey kid…” She can hear Shane’s slightly drawling voice and feels a tingle against her shoulder. “Come on, want to talk about it?”

  


-

  


Shane talks to her a lot. About a lot of strange subjects.

  


Meena loves his stories. Shane had delved a lot into history when he was still alive and he collected some of the weirdest, funniest and unbelievable tales on the way. Meena is glad that her parents are away on the afternoon when Shane tells her stories about Anne Bonnie, because it ends with the three of them racing around the old workshop, shouting things in overblown pirate impressions and laughing way too loud.

  


She starts reading more, borrowing books from the schools library and ignoring the other kids who call her a “weird gothy nerd”. Instead, Meena chats with the librarian and runs into a group of kids that meet after school to play Dungeons & Dragons in the library after school. She originally doesn’t want to get into it, but the illustration of the tiefling warlock is too cool to pass up and suddenly she’s knee deep in lore and holds a pencil smeared character sheet.

  


When she tells her ghost friends about it, Shane is laughing out loud. Meena learns that Shane would host D&D games for years, playing with his friends. Ryan never quite got into it, but he was comfortable sitting by and listening to the insane antics of his husband and their friends.

  


Ryan tells her about the basketball games he would play with his friends. Meena never really cared for sports, much to Ryan’s chagrin, but she does find some of the pictures from the charity games Ryan played at.

  


Both men become very quiet when they see Ryan pose with some of his old friends, grinning brightly with the gleam of the post-game flush on his cheeks.

  


Meena cheers them up with stories of her own D&D game and because Ryan can’t really teach her how to dribble without Meena driving her father insane, she buys a small hoop from her allowance, putting it over the trashcan. She’s getting better at tossing her crumpled pages of writing and doodling that don’t please her through the hoop. Ryan is keeping track of her points.

  


-

  


“What kind of butterfly is it?” She asks one evening when she’s sitting over her Biology homework.

Shane looks up from her book. He’s perched on her desk, watching her like a hawk so she will get her stuff done before dinner. They have begun to watch over her homework and eating habits and while it’s kind of annoying, Meena has to admit that it’s better than being shouted at to bring home better grades because she could embarrass her dad at the PTA meeting otherwise.

  


“I actually don’t know.” Shane admits, looking at it. “I never bothered to check.”

Ryan chuckles in the back, leaning against the support beam in the room while he watches both of them.

“He only had the terrible thing to annoy me anyway.” He quips. Shane sticks out his tongue at him.

  


While they were arguing, Meena has executed her best Google-fu.

  


“Morpho peleides!” She calls out, probably butchering the Latin. “Also called the emperor.”

“Huh.” Shane mutters, looking at the butterfly. “An emperor. Like Napoleon himself.”

“Guy also wore blue.” Ryan adds, only to get startled when Shane’s head whips around to him.

  


“So you do listen to me when I talk about history.”

Ryan seems annoyed for a moment, scoffing.

“Of course I do. Even if I don’t care about what you’re saying you’re… a good narrator.”

“Awh.” Shane starts to grin and Ryan rolls his eyes. “Likewise, babe.”

“Gross.” Ryan says and Meena starts to giggle.

  


Later that night, Shane tries to straighten the frame of the butterfly hanging on the wall. His fingers pass through the glass. Meena looks away when Shane pauses to frown at his fingertips.

  


-

  


They all know what is coming. Things have been changing.

  


Meena doesn’t always come home after school. She has friends to hang with outside of the library and D&D.

Shane’s little advice about being yourself with confidence that he gave Meena once in a while has helped at least a bit and the other kids have decided to give Meena a wide berth instead of honing down on her. Ryan was delighted to see pictures of Meena playing Lacrosse. She will never get into basketball, but she has to admit there is fun in playing team games with others. People who actually want her there.

  


She had a talk with her parents. Surprisingly, her mother had been harder to get to come around, but they had long, evening talks. It didn’t change _everything._ But it helped. They let her wear what she wants and buy her the books she wants for Christmas. When she talks about the girl she’s crushing on, there are no weird glances exchanged between her parents. In fact, her father stops her in the kitchen when they walk into each other one afternoon.

  


“I might not… be an expert on this kind of thing. But… I’m glad you get to be who you are, now.” His face is honest, even if Meena is sure he’s uncomfortable. They share a hug. It’s a start.

  


Her mother helps her re-dye her hair the next time. She comments about how she used to have blue streaks in her hair when she was a teen. She laughs when Meena suggests they could buy some dye for her.

  


-

  


They are fading. Meena hates it but she doesn’t know how to stop it. Ryan and Shane, however, seem mostly happy with it.

  


“Don’t worry about us.” Shane pets her hair and even though Meena can’t really feel it, it helps to soothe her. “We got these huge, long lives behind us. We have to move on at some point.”

“Yeah.” Ryan is sitting on her other side. “Also… Shane hates being a ghost. I just know it. Because it proves I’m right.”

Shane makes a mocking face at him but laughs.

“I was wrong about ghosts. I wonder if I was wrong about the afterlife as well. And… you know, this is your home now. Not ours anymore.”

Ryan smiles at him and shakes his head a bit.

“You know.” He turns to Meena. “When we were still upset about new people living here, another ghost gave us a slip of paper… contacts for a “Bio Exorcist”. A poltergeist to drive you all out.”

Shane puts an arm around Ryan and smiles at Meena.

“Ryan was against it from the start. He never was big on conjuring anything.”

Ryan takes his free hand and rubs his thumb over the back.

“Shane was tempted, but he’s a good guy.” He elbows Shane in the side when his husband waggles his eyebrows at him. “He thought it was too harsh and there were other ways.”

  


-

  


Meena wakes up and instantly knows they are gone.

She sits up, slowly, eyes still closed and hoping to see them when she opens them.

  


Ryan and Shane are gone.

  


She takes the time to curl up in bed for a while and cry over the loss of her two friends. It seems silly, since to everyone else Shane and Ryan didn’t exist, weren’t more than some strange imaginary friends, but Meena misses them anyway. She knows they had to go eventually, but it still hurts.

  


That afternoon, she packs some things and takes a trip to the local cemetery. It takes some time to find them, but eventually, she is standing in front of a double grave with a wide stone.

  


Shane Alexander and Ryan Steven Bergara-Madej. She runs her fingers over the engraving and looks at the dates. They grew old, very old. Ryan outlived Shane by two years, which meant that both lived into their late eighties. Meena can’t help it. She giggles a little. The two of them didn’t sound like old men at all. The line under their dates makes her tilt her head in confusion. She isn’t sure what “Apple Taters” are, but apparently the two of them loved that.

  


There are fresh flowers on the graves and she remembers them talking about their adopted kids, about how Ryan had always been a father and how they eventually moved but still visited on the weekend.

Meena takes the guitar from her back. She has her own by now and she’s getting good. This was Ryan’s anyway and she thinks it’s time to hand it back.

Carefully, she leans the instrument against Ryan’s side of the stone, making sure it doesn’t fall over. Next, she pulls the mounted butterfly from her bag and puts it under Shane’s name. The light catches on it and causes the blue wings to shimmer.

  


“Thank you. Both of you.” She puts a hand on the stone, smiling down at it.

  


“I think I cracked it. You two were still stuck there because I needed to figure some stuff out. Sorry for taking so long getting my shit in line.”

She chuckles and takes a step back, looking over the grave one more time before turning and leaving. Meena has only taking a couple of steps before she thinks about something.

  


“Oh right. If you guys want to come to my Halloween party and haunt some of my friends and I, that is absolutely cool. You’re invited.”

She turns and gives the graves double finger pistols and a wink. She clicks her tongue when she winks.

  


“Smell ya later.”


	38. Shyan Dancing / Getting together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> unsolvedxboogara asked:  
> Promt: the boys learning to dance waltz for a video, wearing elegant suits because I'm a sucker for elegant dudes. It can evolve to sexyness or kisses ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Fluff, Dancing, First Kiss, Getting together  
> Rating: T

_Buzzfeed sometimes just likes to humiliate people,_ Shane thinks as he’s getting help from the costume designer to tie his bowtie. He hasn’t done ballroom dancing for more than a decade and he assumes that most of the people who got roped into this are in a similar situation. The video is probably going to be called “People Dance the Waltz Ten Years after Prom” or something. At least they are going to look gorgeous while making themselves look like idiots, because they are all dressed to the nines. He has already seen Kelsey I. and she’s wearing a beautiful, long, green dress with an actual boa around her shoulders. 

“I’m totally going to steal this for a Poison Ivy cosplay.” She whispered when Shane was carted off to put on his tuxedo. Wing collar and bowtie (at least that’s what the department told him) are the appropriate ballroom attire and he really has no idea what the hell he’s doing. He looks weird. He kind of misses the Clark Gable mustache because if this was a costume, at least he could have fun with it. But no. He’s supposed to be fancy. Shane is bad at being fancy.

When he enters the ballroom, there is already music playing. It’s the one with the long-ass German title that says something about being at this nice blue river but he forgot what the actual title is. Shane sighs and works a thumb under the stupid cummerbund. It’s warm and he’s already getting sweaty.

He throws a glance around at the other “victims”. Most look overwhelmed and overheated. The women all wear long gowns, some bare-shouldered, some not and the men seem to either share Shane’s bowtie-and-cummerbund horror or sweat even worse in a waistcoat under their tuxedo jacket. One of the waistcoat guys is Ryan, who Shane hasn’t seen before. He’s pleasantly surprised to have his ghoulfriend on his side and when Ryan looks up and spots Shane, he seems to feel the same. Ryan’s expression morphs from surprise into a wry smile and when Shane walks up to him he asks: 

“So they got you, too, huh?”

Shane laughs and wants to put his hands in his pants pockets but they are sewed shut. Of course.

“They did. I feel… weird. Overdressed.”

“I feel like I’m right back at prom. Which isn’t exactly a relaxing thought.”

Ryan’s eyes are wide and he looks a bit terrified and Shane reaches out to touch his shoulder for a moment.

“Bad times?” He’s not feeling like making fun of Ryan for it. His own prom had been pretty boring. He asked a friend to go with him and they had kind of split after the first dance, each of them hanging with their own friends and eventually leaving.

“Yeah.” Ryan laughs but he doesn’t sound so happy. “The girl I went with got together with her ex-boyfriend over the course of the night and dumped me.”

“Holy shit.” Shane has trouble keeping his voice down. Before he can try and cheer Ryan up, however, the dancing instructor calls to attention.

-

Over the course of the next two hours, Shane, Ryan and their co-workers stumble across the dancefloor, more or less in three-four time. There is a lot of laughing and cursing and apologizing for stepping on people’s feet. Shane is dancing with Freddie once the instructions are over and luckily doesn’t step on her feet. She nearly pierces his shoe with her stiletto but he instantly forgives her because he’s tried heels and he’s tried dancing and he really doesn’t want to imagine what both in combination would do to him. Forwards or backwards.

He trades glances with Ryan who is dancing with Kelsey. They make a good pair, laughing a lot more than doing actual dancing because they keep forgetting where to put their hands and that it’s right foot forward, not left foot and most of the group ends up laughing at their antics. It’s sweet, but Shane feels a little annoying sting of jealousy at the sight. Of course, the pair-ups were super heteronormative as it’s common for ballroom dancing, but he still entertains the dream of dancing with Ryan and laughing and joking while they move across the dance floor. He has to abandon the thought soon, because it quickly morphs into him thinking about kissing Ryan in the middle of the dancefloor while the music fades and he’s scared that someone somehow could read his thoughts by looking at him. Instead he starts a conversation with Freddie about how most well known Waltz “songs” are German and they are still laughing about their tries of pronouncing “Blumenwalzer” correctly when the instructor calls to a stop.

-

Once the cameras are carted off, the dancers slowly trickle out, chatting about how fun it was to get back into dancing. Shane doesn’t really feel that, but he doesn’t want to take off the tuxedo yet, either. He feels fancy. Even the stupid cummerbund has its charme. Maybe it had helped that a couple of the others had said that he cut a good figure in the suit, but his eyes stray towards Ryan again.

Ryan looks drop dead gorgeous in his suit. He’s a little flushed from the dancing, his hair is sticking up and there is a sheen of sweat on his brow and Shane thinks he looks absolutely stunning in the black tuxedo and the grey vest.

Now with everyone else gone, Shane has no distractions to draw his gaze away from Ryan and he prompty gets caught as Ryan looks up from his phone.

“What’s up? Do I got something on my face?” He instinctively swipes at his temple and nose and Shane almost laughs.

“No. No. Just… thinking.” 

“About what?”

“About what you said earlier. I thought my promp was bad but… yours really sucked and I’m sorry you went through that.”

“Are you still thinking about that?” Ryan seems surprised. “It’s alright, it really is. It’s been forever and it was not like… I don’t know. It wasn’t a _Carrie_ experience.”

Shane chuckles at that. 

“Okay, fair. Could have been worse. But still.”

Ryan grins up at him.

“It’s really fine. I got some fun memories of dancing now.” With that, he gestures to the dance floor and Shane can’t take it anymore.

“Want to dance with me?” He blurts out. Immediately he wants to smack himself. That’s not something you ask your friend who you don’t want to make uncomfortable over your slightly-too-obvious crush. Especially if said friend tends to get a bit nervous about touching guys here and there.

Ryan seems surprised. His eyes are wide and his mouth is slightly open and for a moment, Shane could laugh because he looks just when he hears a weird noise on a “haunted” location. Before Shane can take it back or make a joke, however, Ryan speaks.

“I… None of knows the girl steps.”

Shane’s heart is in his throat but he decides to speak anyway.

“You heard the instructor, right? It’s the same steps, you just start with the second box. Left foot backwards. And… we did this before, remember. By the hotel pool?”

Ryan’s throat moves and Shane can see his eyes dart over the dancefloor, back to Shane’s face, down to the ground-

“We don’t really have music, do we?”

Shane holds up his phone and does a quick Spotify search and soon, the room is filled with music again.

“Never realized that “Breakaway” by Kelly Clarkson is technically a waltz. It’s in three-four time.” He says conversationally so he doesn’t have to look in Ryan’s wide, surprised eyes.

“You’re… actually serious?” Ryan mutters, almost too quiet under the music.

Shane decides to give himself a push and holds out his hand.

“You had a shitty prom experience. I would like you to have a fun time dancing. And… I kind of…” He takes a deep breath. “I kind of want to dance with you. Hope that’s not too weird.”

Ryan blinks and stares at Shane’s hand, then up into his face. He squints and his brow furrows just a little bit as if he’s trying to determine if Shane is mocking him. Shane looks at him, earnestly and lowers his hand a bit so it’s about the height of Ryan’s chest.

Finally, after what feels like an eternity, Ryan raises his hand and places his fingers into Shane’s palm. They shift and step closer. Shane’s hand settles on Ryan’s arm and Ryan’s hand on Shane’s ribs. They don’t quite go for the “waist and shoulder” hold. This way feels closer, more intimate. 

By now, “Breakaway” has finished and another of the unpronouncable German pieces start and Shane only has to tug a little on their joined hands for Ryan to get the message. They both count under their breaths, wheezing slightly when they get to “three” and then Ryan moves forward, guiding Shane into a backwards step.

It’s a bit blocky. They don’t float the same way a waltzing pair is supposed to, but after the first few rounds of just moving in their little boxes, they do start to spin slightly. Shane allows his steps to get a bit bouncier when a brighter, happier piece starts to play and Ryan is right there with him. The dancing gets them breathless pretty quickly, even Ryan who is used to workouts and probably has better cardio than Shane. They also start to giggle all the time, mostly when their eyes meet and Shane is delighted when he sees Ryan’s eyes shine and his face flushing again. He himself feels like he’s probably beet red, from both the dancing and being so close to Ryan. He’s also sure than his affection is now definitely visible to even the densest person and he never considered Ryan dense at all.

And indeed. Ryan’s eyes rest on Shane’s face as they spin to the orchestra music and Shane feels his palm get sweaty in Ryan’s hand. Then, suddenly, out of nowhere, Ryan stops and Shane falters in his step, nearly moving out of Ryan’s hold as he steps backwards alone without Ryan following him.

Ryan’s staring at Shane while the orchestral music swells to a finale and then teeters out. When the room falls silent, Shane realizes how much he tipped his hand and he reaches into his pocket to stop the music on his phone, lowering his gaze to Ryan’s shoes.

He wants to tell Ryan. Wants to talk about how long he has been nursing a crush on him, how it sometimes hurt to be shrugged off when Shane is initiating a simple touch, how weird it feels to see someone share something intimate with Ryan, like the way he and Kesley danced, how Shane isn’t the jealous type but that it sometimes makes him feel tender and unhappy when Ryan will share hugs and dance with others but not with Shane.

But he can’t really speak. He feels his mouth pull down into a frown and it sucks because he had so much fun dancing with Ryan and it could have been just some friends goofing off but now Ryan caught on about how Shane feels and that could make things too awkward for Ryan to stay Shane’s close friend.

Before Shane can let that thought break him, however, he sees Ryan’s feet shuffle closer and looks up to see the same scrutinizing gaze from earlier when he had offered Ryan his hand.

“Are you…” Ryan purses his lips as if trying to determine how to continue.

“Am I insinuating that I absolutely would have asked you to prom and definitely not have abandoned you over the course of the evening?” Shane asks, because he can’t put anything about this out in the open without wrapping it in some form of parable. “I guess that’s what I’m saying.”

“Shane…”

“Listen. It’s fine. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable. This wasn’t what I was going at I just thought it would be fun and I would like this memory not to be stained with some emotional bullshit just because I can’t keep-”

Ryan touches Shane’s face and stops his rambling. They’re standing close now, closer than they had while dancing and the “ballroom” looks too big and too empty from Shane’s perspective as he glances over Ryan’s shoulder, not really understanding what’s going on.

“Come here, you big dingus.” Ryan says quietly and seems to be holding back a laugh as he pulls Shane’s face down and pushes up on his tiptoes to give him a kiss. Shane’s eyes widen as Ryan’s mouth moves against him and he needs a second or two before his brain catches on what’s happening and he can kiss Ryan back. His hands settle on the other’s waist, tracing the edge of the waistcoat with his thumbs as Ryan carefully winds a hand in his hair.

Kissing Ryan in the middle of the dancefloor for real and not in his imagination is a lot to take in and Shane’s mind is reeling a little as he clutches onto Ryan and kisses him with all the pent up emotions he’s been carrying with him for months. Ryan seems not to mind in the least, grabbing onto Shane’s shoulders as he’s nearly dipped backwards but held securely by Shane’s arms. He huffs a breathy laugh against Shane’s mouth as they straighten up again and Shane finally realizes that this isn’t just some moment that Ryan will shrug off later or will turn out to be a dream. This is real. He’s danced with Ryan and now Ryan is kissing him _holy shit._

Finally, they part with another laugh and Shane realizes he’s actually kind of breathless and lightheaded. It’s probably not the dancing this time.

“We have to get back to work, big guy.” Ryan reminds him, but Shane tightens his fingers in Ryan’s tuxedo jacket, making him laugh.

“Easy with the suit, it’s not mine.” Ryan untangles Shane’s fingers but keeps hold of his hands. “Listen. Why don’t we change back into our normal outfits and go to the air conditioned office and then we can discuss in better climate where we could go for dinner. I think this should be talked out over dinner.”

Shane blinks. This sounds awfully like a date.

“Are you asking me out on a date?”

Ryan clears his throat, suddenly looking embarassed.

“I just figured it would be appropriate…”

“Yeah.” Shane says before he can say anything stupid. “Sounds good.”

“Cool.” Ryan chuckles. “Maybe let’s not go dancing until we actually get good at it.”

“Speak for yourself, man.” Shane waggles his eyebrows, feeling emboldened again. “I think I’m spectacular.”

“It is a spectacle to dance with you, that’s true,” Ryan says dryly and Shane’s heart picks up speed at the teasing smirk. Seems like his fear had been for nothing. It didn’t seem to change much between them at all. Perfect.


	39. Ryan is fascinated by Shane's hands

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This wasn't quite prompted.  
> It's a little Shyan drabble born from an idea I had and a talk in the Discord about how handsome Shane looked in the cooking video with the apron and all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags: Hands, not quite worship or fetish, just Fluff, pre-Slash, Baking  
> Rating: G or T, no dirty stuff

Ryan just wanted to steal a glance on his co-host and friend struggling with delicate sweets, that’s all. Someone had invited Shane earlier this week to guest star in a Tasty kitchen video. In the spirit of the slowly nearing holiday season, Rie had picked a recipie for relatively simple sugar cookies but with a twist: She wanted to try out several possible ways of decorating them, or “sprucing up your plain little cookies” as Shane put it.

Sure, out of the two of them, Shane was probably the one who did actually cook once in a while, but Ryan didn’t really expect him to be very good at baking. He missed the first half of the video where Shane helped Rie mixing the dough, chatting about holiday traditions and sweets, but Ryan made it just in time to join the small audience behind the cameras that wanted to watch Shane trying his best with delicate little decorations.

Surprisingly, he managed pretty well. Ryan had expected his “tall, idiotic counterpart“ to struggle with little, delicate things like dabbing tiny dots of liquid sugar on the cookies. But Shane was surprisingly dextrous. Even… _distractingly_ dextrous. Ryan didn’t even realize he was staring until someone next to him giggled and nudged him in the side. Mortified, he closes his mouth, but doesn’t drag his eyes away from Shane’s handiwork.

Ryan would be lying if he claimed that he never noticed Shane’s hands. Of course he did. The way Shane would check the fastened straps of his chest gear when they put on their GoPro’s for the Unsolved shoots, when he swiped his way through social media on the rides to and fro they had to take when they filmed on location. Or Shane blowing warm air into them when they were around snow, refusing to put on gloves like Ryan did because he couldn’t work his camera the way he liked to if his fingertips were covered.

But now Ryan was physically incapable of looking away. Shane carefully tipping the little tray with the cookies so Rie could use the squeeze bag of frosting to put little pink clouds on them, His fingertip pressing on the back of the little knife they used to cut fondant into small shapes to put on the baked goods. Or how his fingers carefully adjusted the cookie cutter they used to softly press a pattern into the still warm food. Rie and Shane kept chatting and whenever Rie praised Shane’s careful attitude, the tall man laughed and mentioned how he usually is very lumbering and clumsy. Ryan almost wants to but in from behind the camera and call him out. Sure, Shane looks ridiculously big and floppy, but Ryan has rarely met anyone more in check of his body and more careful with it. Shane knows he’s tall and that it could unnerve some people, which is why his movements are usually careful and slow and why he falls back when walking in a group or posing in pictures with many people. Shane is the type to fall into the background despite his height and he definitely is the kind of person to be surprisingly delicate with things.

Ryan flushes at the thought, eyes focused on Shane carefully rolling out the fondant and then folding it over to cut out little green trees. He stares as Shane picks up one of the pieces and lays them out on a cookie, applying just the slightest bit of pressure to flatten it before moving away and letting Rie add little red sugar drops to decorate the tree. He’s so completely taken in by Shane’s hands that he barely notices that Rie is wrapping up the video. The moment the cameras are lowered and turned off and Rie and Shane are joking about something, Ryan is moving. Thankfully, the rest of the audience is also closing in on the Tasty set, lured by the sweet treats that Shane and Rie spent the last thirty minutes decorating. Ryan, however, doesn’t really care about cookies. He looks on while Shane rubs off his hands on a small hand towel, eyes on Rie who is talking about the baking she did with her mother as a child. Ryan feels weird. He wants to reach out and hold Shane’s hand, curl his shorter but broader fingers around Shane’s long ones, entwine them. Maybe even bring Shane’s hands closer to his mouth to press a kiss to them. Ryan flushes. Of course he thought about Shane that way before. They are close, their minds are on the same wavelength, they spend a lot of time together. You’re not really friends if you don’t sometimes question if there is a bit of an attraction there. But Ryan never really expected to have a thing for hands, Shane’s or anyone elses. And yet here he stands, shifting because he feels like he’s doing something he’s not entitled to as he looks at Shane’s hand, splayed on the countertop because Shane is leaning against it, listening to Rie’s story. Ryan wants to reach out and take it, but there are too many people around and he also doesn’t want Shane to feel uncomfortable. So instead, he fiddles with the little round knife they used to cut the fondant. It’s almost shaped like a pizza cutter, but a lot sharper as Ryan learns the hard way. As he runs his thumb over it, absentmindedly flicking against the little metal disk, the edge catches on his skin and slides into the pad of his thumb, cutting deep. He curses, dropping the cutter and grabbing his hand. He watches as a bead of blood rises through the small cut, cradled in his other hand but before he can even look for anything, a paper towel is carefully wrapped around it. He hears somewhere far off that Rie gasps and asks if he is okay but he keeps staring at his hand, because Shane’s long, bony fingers are softly cradling his hand, pulling it up as he presses the paper to the cut. It stings and Ryan hisses and the pressure immediately lets up a little. Shane’s hands are cool, but not cold and his hold is so careful and soft that Ryan could easily pull his hand away. He doesn’t, though.

Instead he looks up. Shane’s eyes are focused on Ryan’s hand, still busy with applying the slightest pressure to the small wound. He shakes his head a little and then finally opens his mouth.

“Ryan I know you’re not used to kitchens but please watch those hands.”

“Shut up.” Ryan answers automatically but Shane’s fingers are now curled around his hand. The cut stopped bleeding already, but Shane is still holding Ryan’s hand in both of his, fingertips carefully caressing skin and Ryan isn’t sure if he’s imagining it, but he could almost swear that Shane is pulling him a little closer. Either way, Ryan takes a half-step towards Shane and is surprised to find Shane mirroring him. His “injured” hand is cradled against Shane’s chest, almost protectively and Ryan stares as his broader but smaller hand is hidden away by Shane’s slim ones.

“You need your hands to hunt ghouls, so keep them in good condition.”

Shane sounds like he usually does when he’s joking, but his voice is softer. Ryan glances past him and notices that Rie is leaving them to it, only looking back for a moment to give Ryan a knowing smile. He looks up at Shane and is surprised to catch the other man inspect Ryan’s hand. He turns it in his long, cool fingers, passing the pad of his forefinger over Ryan’s thumb. The cut is barely visible now, but Shane still stares at it. Ryan ducks his head and tries to catch Shane’s eyes, only to watch Shane dodge him.

“Hey.” He finally says. “Thank you.”

Shane wraps the paper towel around Ryan’s thumb again and merely hums. He’s still holding Ryan’s hand closer.

“Good work. Here, I mean.” Ryan clears his throat. “I didn’t know you could do… that kind of delicate work, I guess.”

Shane hums.

They look at each other. Shane’s thumb is stroking over the back of Ryan’s hand and it sends little electric pulses down Ryan’s arm and spine. Before he can say anything else, Shane drops one hand, closing the other carefully around Ryan’s fingers.

“Come on, we’ll get you a bandaid.”

He doesn’t even have to tug to get Ryan to fall into step next to him. Despite that, he keeps hold of Ryan’s hand and Ryan, still a little stunned, curls his fingers around Shane’s hand in return. He hears Shane exhale next to him, their palms are sliding together and Ryan is sure he hears wolf-whistles behind them as his cheeks and ears grow warm. Shane doesn’t let go of his hand as they walk away from the set and Ryan doesn’t either, enjoying the sensation of Shane’s digits curled around the back of his hand.

**Author's Note:**

> If you liked this, consider leaving me a comment :D


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